Does my son have an awful name?

[tabithamay]

I’ve done a similar thread on Nameberry but wanted other people’s opinions. I have a 17-year-old DS who’s started his second year at college, and we chose Ernest Leopold as a first and middle, after my DH’s great-grandfather. Recently, he’s become very aware of it as people are telling him how ugly/old-fashioned/frumpy/strange it is. What do you think?

Oh, children can be so cruel. His both names actually are very original and beautiful.

I don't like the name but then I come from an area where all names are fairly "mainstream". Anything unusual would really stick out.

To me it's a very "posh" sounding name. Similar to Jonty etc

Kids will always pick on something and it's only a name isn't it? If that's all they can think of to pick on him for by the age of 17 then he's doing pretty well!

He’s really into the Victorian period, and wants to pursue a career in history, so I told him that his name matches the period perfectly, and that was some consolation I think.

Yes.

I LOVE the name...but then again both my boys have "old man" names.

Can't beat the classic names imo!

OP this is definitely a time for building up his confidence, talking about respect, being non-plussed and nonchalant about it. They go low, we go high.

It’s not a time for stressing about a choice you made 17 years ago.

Do not advise him to change his name (as pp have suggested). What message is that? Someone says one sarky thing and you capitulate? If he brings up changing it say it’s his choice but he got through secondary ok and he’s never disliked it so while he should do as he likes he should think carefully before folding at the slightest pressure from others.

Do college students still act so immature even in year 2 They really need to grow up.
I was bullied for my surname A LOT in high school so when I went on to have my children I swore I would just stick to really common names so they wouldn’t have to go through what I did.
But it all sort of came to an end at college as most of us had grown up and had better things to do then make fun of names.
His name is different and cool.

I like it but ultimately the only person whose opinion matters is your ds.
He’s almost an adult. He can change his name if he wants to but he shouldn’t rush into it & he shouldn’t do it because he has a few months to spend wearing it on a badge, with some immature teens. He will probably never have to have his full name around his neck again.
If you acknowledge that he could change it, when he’s older, if he still doesn’t like it, it might help him relax & see these comments for what they are - temporary & irrelevant. His own opinion matters.

I much prefer Ernest to Ernie

I think he should totally “own” his name.

This is a good lesson in resilience and respect. He needs to own his name and the people who are teasing him will see there is no mileage in it and drop it pretty fast.

“He’s really into the Victorian period, and wants to pursue a career in history, so I told him that his name matches the period perfectly, and that was some consolation I think.”

Because everyone wants to be named after Leopold ll of Belgium, right?

I would ask him what he wants to do: take the moral high ground and front it out, laugh it off, say “I know, my parents featured on Crimewatch for this “ or change to Leo.

Actually I think the whole point of middle names is to give the bearer of the name some options as to what they get called.

'Ernie' is a bit dated though - reminds me of that old song by Benny Hill about a milkman who drove the fastest milkcart in the west

I think it's the Leopold that's harsh.

Could you suggest he 'lose' his ID badge then pay for another to be printed with Ernest Leo on it?

Or even Leo Ernest?

...so I told him that his name matches the period perfectly, and that was some consolation I think

Seriously?

“I think he should totally “own” his name.

This is a good lesson in resilience and respect. “

If he likes his name, fine.

But why ‘should’ he do anything other than deal with it in the way he most wants to deal with it? It’s up to him. Making your own choices also builds resilient. My cousin changed a name her parents gave her and that she didn’t like and it was if a weight had been lifted.

The OP can discuss options with her DS, but in the end, he’s already had her choice imposed in him (as we all do with our kids names), and she should now suppprt him whichever way he chooses.

It’s absolutely dreadful and I completely understand why he has a problem with it. If I was him I would go by Leo and a message to people trying to be clever, you don’t have to live with the daft name, your kids do

I like it. Why would you want him to change his name to a common one? Ignore negative comments.

But why ‘should’ he do anything other than deal with it in the way he most wants to deal with it?

Your advice was "Tell him to change his ‘everyday’ name to Leo.". How is that anything other than telling him what he should do?

bit late to be worrying now?

I echo Soupdragon’s ‘Seriously?’.
Is this a wind-up?

Sorry but I think both names are awful. Ernest sounds like a really old man and Ernie is even worse and just makes me think of the awful Benny Hill song.

Leo is nice although I only now dogs with the name.

Ernest is fine but not Leopold but then do people broadcast their middle name, mine is very common for my age group but I doubt if anyone knows or cares what it is.

Atalane
I think he should totally “own” his name. This is a good lesson in resilience and respect. He needs to own his name and the people who are teasing him will see there is no mileage in it and drop it pretty fast

Completely agree, love your post.
And as for Ernest/ Ernie, I like it OP!

“Your advice was "Tell him to change his ‘everyday’ name to Leo.". How is that anything other than telling him what he should do?”

True! Guilty as charged.

I retract to “you could suggest that one of his options would be to.”
Or “if he wants to use Leo, support him”