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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Partner won't even discuss my No. 1 choice

60 replies

user1486667116 · 09/02/2017 19:15

I'm not even pregnant yet, we are trying, but we were chatting about baby names. I always loved the name Peregrine either for a boy or a girl. I know it's a boy's name, but I think it would be nice as a girl's name too. I'm obviously not dead set on this, very much up for discussion and have some other names I like too, but my partner wouldn't even consider it. He just says that it's a stupid name.

My question is, is it really that stupid? I'm basically trying to counter his 'it's stupid' argument with 'but other people think it's nice too'.

I have some other, more common names I like too, so I'm sure we will be able to agree on something.

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FellOutOfBed2wice · 09/02/2017 19:40

It is what it is. Some names you like for years and your partner hates them/it doesn't go with surnames/a celebrity has the name or uses it and they're a twat. Fwiw neither of my children have the names I loved growing up- but their names are ones me and DH came up with together and I love them just as much, if not more, than the names I thought they'd have when I was 15.

vitaminC · 09/02/2017 19:42

I'm not a huge fan of Peregrine, but I've known a few people called Perry, both male and female, which I quite like for either sex.

It's moot, though, if your husband doesn't like it. Baby naming is all about compromise, IME, and often neither parent gets to use his/her favourite name, but end up agreeing on one that is acceptable to both.

greeeen · 09/02/2017 19:44

That name usually gets a hard time on here so I don't think you'll get the responses you want but I know two (both boys) and I really like it on both of them. I don't personally think it works for a girl.

strawberrypenguin · 09/02/2017 19:44

But he has discussed it. You said you like it, he said he doesn't. End of discussion I'm not sure what else you want him to say

SuperBeagle · 09/02/2017 19:47

I don't like it, sorry, OP.

FWIW, I automatically vetoed my DH's favourite name: Enzo. It sounds like a cleaning agent. I couldn't have it. There was no room for negotiation. However, we also chose (albeit together) not to use my favourite girl's name.

PurpleDaisies · 09/02/2017 19:48

Getting pregnant isn't a given. Why don't you wait until you've definitely got a baby to name first?

For what it's worth, there would be some names that would get an instant veto from me, and I'm sure dh feels the same about others. There's no point discussing further if something's a definite no. Peregrine is a marmite name. I can understand him hating it.

reuset · 09/02/2017 21:01

My question is, is it really that stupid?

Yes it is. It's either very old aristocracy or a Middle Earth character.

CactusFred · 09/02/2017 21:05

It's an awful name and if he doesn't like it he doesn't like it!

You both need to agree on a name as you'll be making the baby together!

selfishcrab · 09/02/2017 21:07

I was given a 'unusual' name.
I hated it when growing up, I still hate it, I've changed my name to something that I find I don't have to repeat every time I say my damn name.
I really do dislike this need for having a unusual name, it singles you out and I was teased about mine!

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 09/02/2017 21:41

There's no discussion to be had. If either of you hate a name, then it needs to be vetoed. If I got all upset whenever DH thought my suggestions were crap, I'd be upset all the time.

RortyCrankle · 09/02/2017 21:53

What a very sensible DH you have OP

BastardGoDarkly · 09/02/2017 22:01

Meh, unfortunately/fortunately, you both get to say... You're fucking joking right?.... Until you agree on a name.

I wanted Ripley, dh just went pfffffft, and that was that. I was disappointed, but we ended up with a name we both like.

Waterfeature · 09/02/2017 22:14

It's fine if you're extremely rich, and posh. Otherwise, no. And definitely not a girls' name.

Ordinarily · 09/02/2017 22:17

How about Perita (a Hebrew name) or Perdita, with Peri as nickname?

Crunchyside · 09/02/2017 22:24

Why would you want him to discuss it? I feel that baby names are a matter personal taste, like music, not really something you can talk someone into liking or disliking.

If my husband disliked a name I'd lose enthusiasm for it because I want my baby to have a name his father likes... Just move on - think how happy you'll be to have one you both like!

TheEdgeofSeventeen · 09/02/2017 22:29

likeacrow - sorry but your husband was right to veto cherry - Its a prostitute name :/ do you want kids yelling 'cherry lost her cherry' at your kid in HS ?
OP I think its interesting and kind of like it but like others have pointed out - Perrie from Little Mix ( ew) and isn't there that new film out last year ? ' Miss Peregrine's home for Peculiar Children' .... not sure you want to imply an association with being peculiar.

TheEdgeofSeventeen · 09/02/2017 22:31

Then again I like Tobias and Cornelius for boys and Violet/ Ava for girls so who am I to have a say :')

likeacrow · 09/02/2017 23:10

TheEdgeofSeventeen apology accepted.

AmysTiara · 09/02/2017 23:12

I agree with him tbh

Buntysoven · 10/02/2017 00:49

Likeacrow I love the name Cherry too. It sounds so happy. Where did this prostitute thing come from?! Peregrine on the other hand ...sorry OP...is truly yuk especially for a girl

nooka · 10/02/2017 02:23

The issue with Cherry is that 'popping your cherry' is a euphemism for losing your virginity.

I don't think that there is anything particularly wrong with saying that you think a name is stupid/silly/ridiculous etc when it is for a completely hypothetical baby.

Lochan · 10/02/2017 03:22

He doesn't have to have a good reason for disliking it - he just doesn't.

Both parents have an absolute veto on baby names. No reasons required.

I have given unusual names to my DC but I agree with your DH, Peregrine is not a name I'd use.

isagrey64 · 10/02/2017 04:12

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

DirtyBlonde · 10/02/2017 06:53

I don't see what there is to discuss. He doesn't like it, thinks the name is stupid (blunt, but I don't see it as rude in the way others do). Do you just want to hear all that over again?

Or were you hoping to browbeat persuade him to call his DC a name he despises?

SaorAlbaGuBrath · 10/02/2017 07:00

You can't force your DP into a name he hates, just as he couldn't force you into a name you hate. You both have to agree.

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