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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

If you waited until after baby had arrived to name them...

52 replies

Dreamer100 · 28/09/2016 23:42

...well, what happens if you still can't choose a name even when the baby is in your arms?! I'm due soon and can't decide. I am indecisive by nature and just know that whatever I choose I'll regret and want to change again the next day! Posters often say you'll just know when you see the baby - really?

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DeputyPecksBentBeak · 30/09/2016 11:03

We didn't find out with either of the DC's. For our first we had a girls name decided early on. Not intentional we just fell in love when it was mentioned and nothing else matched. We had nothing for a boy, really struggled. Eventually settled on a name a week before due date. We had a girl and I'm so glad we didn't have a boy because we just weren't keen on the name that we'd chosen. We didn't even consider the names when I was pregnant with dc2 and it was only just over a year later.

Second pregnancy we had a boys name that we loved and we couldn't agree on a girls name. I'd loved loads of girls names when pregnant with my first, just none had compared, so I thought I'd find it easy. We still hadn't decided when DS was born. We had a boys name picked out at around 16 weeks but as time passed it just didn't feel right. We didn't want to have our DC's names match or really go together as that just wasn't important to us but when I said all our names out loud it just didn't fit or seem right somehow and I still can't put my finger on why. Then when I was around 34/35 weeks DH mentioned a name in passing and it just clicked and the name we had previously decided on became his middle name.

I think it's one thing reading names and putting them with your surname, it's another thing saying them out loud. Sometimes it can change how the name 'feels' if that makes any sense

Now pg with dc3 now and we won't find out again. Fuck knows what we're going to decide on, but it's early days yet so we've got plenty of time.

chinlo · 30/09/2016 11:33

Where we live, it's highly unusual not to have chosen a name before the baby is born. Parents want to talk to their unborn child by name, and they inform their family and friends, etc. It's totally normal.

I don't mind it. I don't see any reason to wait (I think babies take on the look of whatever name you give them, rather than looking like a specific name) and I don't really see any reason to keep it a secret or surprise, once you've decided.

MrsCharlesBrandon · 30/09/2016 17:24

We had 2 girls names and one boy for dd1, dh looked at her after she was born and said "she looks like a 1st name". Dd2 was named not long after the 20wk scan, and there's no way she could be anything else. Ds was named pre-birth but it didn't suit him. Tried our several names for 5 days until Dh suggested one that stuck!

spnfan · 30/09/2016 17:27

DH and I both had separate lists of names we liked and had about 5 that were on both lists.

I was getting really nervous in the final weeks because it really felt like one of us was going to have to give in and agree to a name we weren't sure on.

As soon as I laid eyes on DD I knew which name was right for her. Which, incidentally, I wasn't sure about before she was born.

(If you go in for the 'woo' stuff - when I was pregnant we used to read our lists out loud to my bump and she would only kick when we read her name )

Derry76 · 30/09/2016 17:35

All this 'the baby doesn't look like a such and such' is a load of crap. Babies look like babies! They change day by day.
We had names for both of ours weeks before the due dates and stuck to them. Did they look like their name when they were born? Probably not,but their names grow with them and become loved because that's who they are

Samdensham88 · 30/09/2016 17:39

I named to son way before I got pregnant!!! I always wanted a George and that's what I had! And it suits him very well 😍

If you waited until after baby had arrived to name them...

Offred2 · 30/09/2016 17:50

When our daughter was born we couldn't decide between two names - a traditional though not overly popular name, and a more 'out there' name, which we were a bit worried was a bit of a 'marmite' name.

Chatting with the midwife we mentioned our indecision and told her the two names. Her reaction to the 'out there' name was a long silence followed by "hmmm, is that a family name?". We went with the other name!

The 'out there' name was Ingrid.

Lancelottie · 30/09/2016 17:57

The older two were named pre-birth. The third one had a middle name ready, picked by the older two. Then we spent about two weeks trying out first names in front of that until we found one nobody hated.

donajimena · 30/09/2016 17:57

My son didn't have a name for 3 weeks. He probably wouldn't have one now if it hadn't been for the sad passing of my grandmother. We were putting an obituary in the paper and we couldn't really put great grandmother of Charles and his brother.. so I just picked a name and luckily I don't regret it. I really did pick it out of thin air and I didn't have it on any 'list'

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 30/09/2016 18:04

Ds3 didn't have a name. We'd used our 6 favourites names on ds1 and ds2, so were a bit stuck. I don't love his name - the one we kind of said "that'll do" in all but words, and wish we had taken more care over it. Altgough it's fine. I am pleased however that I said no to DH's dream name Hector. !

Redesul · 30/09/2016 18:04

My partner and I had once discussed what we'd call a dog if we got one. I hated the name he would have chosen. Then I got pregnant, still hated it. Half way through it really started growing on me. Then I just loved it. It's a very strong name, if you like meanings, it means "bear". Had a few names picked out, but when my 9lb 9 oz son was bundled into my arms, I just knew his name. He's a very big built, tall boy and it still suits well now.

Redesul · 30/09/2016 18:14

Forgot to add, his name is Arthur. His middle name was simple . My partner is Paul, my dad is Paul, my step-dad is Paul, partners dad is also called Paul. We wanted some sort of nod to family

Tiredqueen87 · 30/09/2016 18:16

Took us 2 weeks to name DD, annoyed other people more than us

ample · 30/09/2016 18:19

Had a few names for DD, nothing set in stone.
We went with a name we both loved. It's not a twee girls name, more a mature one and she grew into it (didn't take long).
I didn't believe babies could do that but they really do.

I say always go with a name you love. You will be calling it out and writing it down for the rest of your life so whether it's by meaning or tradition, or just the sound of it - go with the name you love.

eurochick · 30/09/2016 18:21

We had a shortlist of three for each sex and figured we would decide when the baby arrived. But she didn't look like anything (was prem so looked mostly like ET). We tried out our names for a day each and found one worked so went with that. It took us about a week to decide. Other people nag a lot though! The nurses in the hospital made a few jokey/narky comments. I had a baby in nicu and was recovering from a CS. Her name was not my top priority!

meganorks · 30/09/2016 20:07

Dd1 had two names. When she was born I just started calling her one whilst still off my face so that was that. Dd2 had a long list. After she was born read through them and Dp just said 'no,no,no' until 1 was yes. We both liked it so that was that.
Should point out we didn't know if we were having girls or boys and were pretty screwed on boys names - names one of us loved the other hated, or ones we both though were OK but not great.

I would suggest have a few ready and see when they come. And don't discuss any names with anyone other than dp or they will all get poo pooed by someone or other!

Purple52 · 30/09/2016 20:47

Baby number one had a boys name and a girls name. He's a boy!

Baby number 2 had No1's girls name and a list of 3/4 boys names - none of which we could confirm on - mostly because DH wouldn't discuss it as he was so convinced I was having a girl! (I wasn't!).

Thankfully baby 2 was a girl - so we never carried the conversation on!

Happyhippy45 · 30/09/2016 20:50

We waited until DD and ds were born until we named them. Took 4 days to be sure about dds name but ds name was an instant decision.
The spelling of dds name wasn't decided until registrars

Summerlovin24 · 30/09/2016 20:54

First one when we were in hospital, went back to one of the first names we picked. Second one had 2 girls names sorted. Heard a midwife running down corridor shouting a name and decided to have that. One of original names we had chosen became her middle name

Nospringflower · 30/09/2016 20:54

We named all our boys before they were born. I think you become your name so it doesn't really matter what you look like.

DT2000 · 30/09/2016 20:55

DD was named by DP while I was asleep (emergency c-section), we had a choice each and he went with his! DS didn't have a name for 2 days as all the ones we'd chosen didn't suit him, we also struggled as he looked exactly like his DS. My mum didn't name me for 5 days and got my name from an American TV show she watched in hospital .
Just pick the ones you like then see what suits baby when they're born

BeanyGodkin · 30/09/2016 22:21

Bonded with boy baby as Rufus for last 15 weeks of pregnancy in spite of close friend and relatives dislike of the name. When he was born he was still Rufus. Not the posh sort of Rufus: just a little monkey with a funny baby face. Him. He could be no other person and sometimes you just have to go with who you feel they are.

dentydown · 01/10/2016 09:35

My girl was known as Cheetara-mae throughout the pregnancy. Then became Emily. We decided on emily pretty earlier in the pregnancy. My choices were a bit rubbish!

Cathaka15 · 01/10/2016 09:58

We had a list of names both me and Dh loved. Then when baby was born we knew exactly which name would suit him.

EwanWhosearmy · 01/10/2016 10:56

We had names for the first 3 before they were born. The next 2, DH vetoed the name towards the end of the pregnancy. DC4 got a panicked can't think of anything else name after 4 weeks of being known as The New Baby. DC5 was nameless about 2 weeks.

I still love the names of the first 3 (DC1 is 30!), but still don't think 4 & 5 are right (25 and 9).

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