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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Help, I think I chose the wrong name!

93 replies

MissusBea · 07/02/2016 14:20

DD is ten months old now and I have never felt quite settled about her name. DH admits that it niggles him too. When I say her name to people over the age of 50 (and some younger) I sometimes get a reaction or slightly negative comments even. I am thinking about getting it changed - is it too late?

We called her Martha, but I am afraid that its not pretty and maybe even a little frumpy (servants name?). She's a beautiful, bright little thing. Thinking of adding the name Eleanor to the birth certificate as that seems so much more elegant and beautiful (means 'shining light', name of several Queens etc)

Honest thoughts / opinions pls! Am I overthinking this? Is it too late?

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banff82 · 08/02/2016 17:38

but Martha is much more feminine/energetic/pretty/unique to me than Eleanor which sounds rigid, old fashioned and not particularly pretty.

See, for me this would be completely the other way around. I'm really not keen on the 'old lady' names like Martha, Maude, Mabel etc. although I know they're very popular on MN. Eleanor on the other hand is a beautiful name and personally I would change it if I were you OP.

Jinglebells99 · 08/02/2016 17:45

I like Eleanor. I don't really like Martha. It does sound frumpy to me whereas Eleanor sounds pretty and sophisticated. I would change it, if I were you. Eleanor Martha Ann has a nice ring to it.

harryhausen · 08/02/2016 17:45

Omg Martha! Like, coolest Dr Who companion ever. She saved the world several times over

I love the name Martha. My friend has a 7 year old Martha and she's quirky, beautiful and very bright.

I like Eleanor too but all the ones I know are shortened to Ellie and there are dozens at my dd's school so I'm put of.

MrBensMrs · 08/02/2016 20:44

I love the name Martha and know a Martha who is very clever with a great job, lovely husband, lovely house in the country and just had a baby, and she's pretty to boot. I would keep it as its unusual and lovely!

Canyouforgiveher · 09/02/2016 01:24

I love Martha. Like others it reminds me of the Tom Waits song "and those were days of roses, poetry and prose and Martha all I had was you and all you had was me" Lovely.

I also think your grandmother just made that comment about the bible for something to say. My mother and her generation (probably your grandmother's generation) were great for "something to say". They also didn't give as much mind to naming as we did in many cases ((which is why half my cousins have the same names) so wouldn't understand that you would be expecting a "That's a lovely name" when you announced it.

And Martha of Martha and Mary in the bible ... I think she was very very hard done by and I consider her a feminist heroine in some ways. She got reprimanded by Jesus for feeding him - I bet he wouldn't have been long complaining if there was no food that night. BUT she managed to get out of him a statement that it is better for women to forget about the food and cleaning and generally clearing up after men and participate in life instead (while actually feeding everyone at the same time and having the balls to complain about being ignored). Way to go Martha!

susurration · 10/02/2016 11:00

I adore the name Martha, I think it's really beautiful. I think the meaning of Martha is 'Lady' so equally as elegant as Eleanor?

tomatodizzy · 10/02/2016 11:04

I like Martha, I prefer it to Eleanor actually. I've known a couple of frumpy Eleanors but never met a Martha.

CottonFrock · 10/02/2016 11:18

Absolutely, Canyou. Martha in the Bible gets pissed off when her sister sits lazily listening to Jesus, leaving Martha to do all the cooking and serving, and quite rightly appeals to Jesus to suggest her sister gets off her ass and helps. The fact that Jesus's reply is monumentally irritating doesn't change the fact that Martha is cool, assertive and ballsy, and not afraid to enlist the son of God in her complaints about being stuck with all the work. Also, she has a brother who gets raised from the dead.

It's a lovely name. You sound as if you've let yourself be overly rattled by a few negative comments. All four grandparents loathed my son's unusual Biblical name, but that is because they think all children should be called John or Mary. I wouldn't take the slightest notice of criticisms other people are rude enough to express. If you dislike the name yourself, it's another matter, of course.

SpecialStains · 10/02/2016 13:21

I love the name Martha! When I worked with reception kids there was a lovely little girl called that in my class. Name suited her so much!

sidonie1 · 10/02/2016 13:48

Late to the discussion, but I love 'Martha' too! A really beautiful name.

EnriqueTheRingBearingLizard · 10/02/2016 14:08

Personally I much prefer Martha. There's nothing wrong with Eleanor but all my life it's been very well used, nearly always shortened to Ellie.

I don't have any knowledge of the Biblical character, but can comment on the 'frumpy' aspect. There are lots of names back in fashion now that haven't been used for a long time, Evelyn is a case in point, widely loved by MNers but until seeing that here, the only other one I know is nearly 90 now.

It's hard to imagine a new wave of Christine, Lyndsey, Barbara, Diane, Jane or Janets, but never say never, Each generation forges their own favourites

The important thing for me is that your little DD knows and identifies with her name and she'll make it her own and provide people with totally new associations

AmpersandRea · 10/02/2016 14:13

I have a Martha! We haven't had any negative remarks about her name (she's a teenager now and we have met very few Marthas)
I like the name Eleanor as well, but I bet it would be shortened to Ellie - much more common name.

MummaGiles · 10/02/2016 14:20

I love the name Martha, and think it's really pretty. No real advice only to say it must be tough if the name you chose doesn't quite stick.

HeyNonnyMaybe · 10/02/2016 14:27

I much prefer Martha to Eleanor, although they're both in the 'servant name' camp to me, along with names like Honor, Mary, Bridget. That's not a negative, I just mean that to me they have a similar vibe. I really dislike Ellie though, which would definitely rule out Eleanor.

I do like the earthiness of Martha, and in a non-rhotic accent the ah sound in the middle is lovely. And it looks nice written down.

I love Marnie, would that be any good as a NN?

Cinnamon2013 · 10/02/2016 14:30

I love it.

brookeberry · 10/02/2016 14:33

I love the name Martha. I hate that people comment negatively on a baby's name. We've picked a name for DC1 that I'm sure not everyone will like. I'm going to do my very best to ignore any negative reactions. It's so rude and thoughtless! Martha is a beautiful name, no question.

HeyNonnyMaybe · 10/02/2016 14:50

brooke, I don't think there are any names that everyone will like. People are indeed rude and thoughtless to comment negatively on a name that a child has already been given.

itsmaddieeexoxo1115 · 11/02/2016 22:49

Martha is gorgeous!!

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