Help me convince DH of my name choice please!

[TerrysNo3]

DS2 was born on Tuesday evening, we already have DS1 and DD who have short (4 letter) names which are quite unusual.

The name I like is Xavier (pronounced with a Z) as my dad's family are Portuguese so I'd like a link to that. I think it sounds nice in its full form but also shortened to Zave when he's older.

DH thinks it's too out there and that no one will pronounce it right. Oh and he thinks everyone will think he's an X Man

What do you think?

Xavier was our second choice name for DS1, who is called Xander. One of our concerns was the pronunciation of Xavier (and the fact that we both loved Xander as a name).

DS2 is called Penn, which might be a bit American for you but again we love, love, love. We didn't put any names on our lists unless we both loved them so, although I do like Xavier, I think it's a little bit unreasonable to use it unless your DH is totally on board.

Congrats on DS2!

Xavier was traditionally pronounced with a Z in English, it's only since X-men that some people have thought it should be pronounced the other way, and possibly through the influence of other languages. I think older people would automatically get it right and everybody else will get it once you've told them. If anyone thinks it's strange, just explain about the Portuguese connection and say they've always done it that way there.

I don't love the name myself, but I like the fact that it is traditional, with a long history behind it, yet not too common.

I instantly thought x men, sorry

It's a great name and no one I know would pronounce the X as ex. Even the ones who know about the X men. Including DC who still know that real people are pronounced With the z sound .

Doesn't Xavier crop up in a school french text book? It did when I was at school. And I know two round here but both are from French families. Sounds a bit old fashioned to me, probably because of the text book, but then lots of old names are popular again now.
However I'm a bit stunned that you're just going to grind down your dh til he agrees with you. I can just imagine the reaction on here if someone's dh had the same strategy. You may have given birth to it but surely you're both the parents? Strange example to give your children too. "Your friend doesn't like something? Never mind, grind them down and they'll like it eventually."

I figure once we choose it he will learn to love it because once a child has a name that name becomes them!

What utter nonsense! You need to find names you both like. Or is that too weird an idea. I think it's very unreasonable for you to be forcing your preference.

That's bullshit trexing - she may have grown him but they'll both parent him for the next 18 years (and more!).

Agree reuset.

A little plea from someone with a more (shall we say) unusual name in real life - don't do it. Please don't do it! Give him a cutesy home nickname instead but this sticks with him his whole life and your DH isn't wrong either...

(Sorry, that's an unusual spelling name which is not far off from a film hero at the time. Drives me mad.)

That's bullshit trexing - she may have grown him but they'll both parent him for the next 18 years

Well thanks for getting your crystal ball out for us, that's handy. But just in case you're not actually psychic, and given they have to name the baby now, not in 18 years, I'd probably name him whatever the fuck I wanted, if Id pushed him out of my vagina, unless there was a name that both parties agree on.

I agree with your DH.

Sorry

Xavier (and not X-avier) is a fine name.

However! I'm not gong to persuade your DH of anything because if he doesn't like it, he doesn't like it and it isn't fair to "bully" him into it.

I'd probably name him whatever the fuck I wanted, if Id pushed him out of my vagina

IMO that makes you a nasty bully. It's not like the father has the option of being pregnant or giving birth.

The child has TWO parents and both should agree on what they are called.

I have a three month old Xavier, it was DHs choice. We call him Xavi. Some people do say ex-ay-vyer.. But mostly zavi/ zayv-yer. I know of one more where we live. It's grown on me and it suits him!

Oh and he thinks everyone will think he's an X Man hmm

1. he will be Zavier not X-ayvier
2. there are worse things for a boy to be mistaken for

Agree with soup - every name has a link to something.

I wasn't that keen on Xavier, but I like it a whole lot more than your dh's choices

I would know it was pronounced "zaviere" as, well, that's just how you pronounce it. I taught one back in the 1980s, but it's the same for words like xylophone - that's how you do pronounce a word with X at the beginning. If it is 'Ex' sound, then it's a word that has an E at the start.

That's still bullshit trexing, and nasty to boot. For all you know the father could end up raising the baby on his own, anything could happen.
So let's look at the circumstances rather than inventing scenarios, eh?
As squoosh says, the father doesn't have an option to be pregnant or give birth, it's ridiculous to then go "na na ne na nah, I did it so your vote doesn't count".

God forbid both parents get a say, amirite?

What is it with the name Jaxon, all of a sudden? New baby round here called that - I'd never heard of the spelling before.

Jackson is perfectly acceptable but Jaxon makes me recoil in horror.

I love Xavier and it was on our list for DS2 - however, we decided it was probably a bit too unusual for where we live so went with something simpler that we also loved.

What I mean by that is we didn't want him having to constantly explain that the X is a Z sound.

Hi all, we have a name and its one we both love but DH couldn't come round to Xavier.

For the record my DH is not one to be coerced into anything and neither would I force him to agree, I was only asking if anyone had any ideas which might make him see the name in a different light.

But I do love some of the melodramatic comments :)

Glad you have found a perfect name, OP - and CONGRATULATIONS on the birth of your baby!