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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

SIL took my baby name and I can't get over it! Help!

50 replies

UsedToBeASize10 · 01/06/2015 21:00

This may sound ridiculous but honestly, I am losing sleep over this situation and am seeking some advice/support/empathy from other mums who might have been in a similar situation.

Here it is, on a plate: my fave name for DD1 (Rosie) was vetoed by DH as he couldn't get along with it. I ended up using it in the middle, 'just in case' I never had another girl. At least in some way, it had been used. I was sad, and never really came to terms with my decision to back down. I made a mental note to use an adaptation of Rosie (Rose or Rosa) for a future DD. Well, I got pregnant again and guess what? So did SIL. I think you can guess where this is going. At the very last minute, after announcing 'she' was going to be called Seren, they chose Rosalie! And guess what? They call her Rosa like ALL the time! And they (SIL and my brother) KNEW how I felt about Rosie. So I feel quite let down about it all actually - especially as they have tried to 'disguise' what they've done and left me unable to use a variation of my absolute favourite name. Their DD arrived a few months earlier than my DD2, so there was nothing I could really say or do. So, I plumped for Rowan, which is nothing like what I wanted really. Now, I just feel burning resentment towards them and I really don't want to as they are actually both real nice people (if not a tiny bit smug). Please tell me if you have ever been through this, and if it gets better with time....anyone? At this moment in time, I don't feel like I will ever get over it. P.S. It might also be worth mentioning that my mum liked the name too and my brother had always been a bit of a kiss ar£e - this annoys me even more!!

Thanks for reading.

OP posts:

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Methe · 01/06/2015 21:03

Rowan is a beautiful name and rose and variations of rose are rather dull.

Look on the bright side :)

Stoppissingonthefloor · 01/06/2015 21:04

My cousin named her dog the same name (willow) as my baby a week after she was born.. That was annoying..
I'm sorry they ripped off your name, not cool.. If it's any consolation I like Rowan is gorgeous and a name that grows better iykwim. X

StrawberryMojito · 01/06/2015 21:04

You're going to have to let it go, there's no solution as such. If it's any consolation, I think Rowan is a much nicer name than Rosalie, Rosa or Rosie.

Orange6358 · 01/06/2015 21:05

You should have stuck with rosa and said to her 'congrats on the birth and stunning name. I really don't mind you calling your DD rosa too, great minds think a like'

Impala77 · 01/06/2015 21:10

My mum was carrying my sister and a pregnant friend asked what name she had if it was a girl, so she told her "Stacy", the friends baby arrived a week before my sister and she called her Stacy, my mum still called my sister Stacy as her heart was set on it but she still talks about it now 36 years later! It's not cool to pinch names.
As others have said though Rowan is a lovely name.

DrankSangriaInThePark · 01/06/2015 21:17

She probably thought that as you had already used it as a middle name, you had no intention of using it again as a first name.

You need to let it go.

wreckingball · 01/06/2015 21:23

Use the name anyway if you love it so much, I have two cousins called John, their Fathers are brothers, I don't know if Auntie of the eldest one was miffed at the time but they all seem to get on just fine.

wreckingball · 01/06/2015 21:25

What about Rosalind?

wreckingball · 01/06/2015 21:26

Oh sorry, didn't rtft properly, Rowan is a nice name too.

Flingingmelon · 01/06/2015 21:27

This happened totally by accident with me and my sister. I picked a better name

September60b · 02/06/2015 07:13

My friend gave birth to her daughter 2 weeks before I had mine, and unknowingly called her the name that me and my dh has fallen in love with way before I got pregnant. We had no other names picked out - it was the only name I liked! I know how you feel. I was really upset.

I picked another name and guess what? It suited my daughter so much more than the first name and I loved it as soon as she was born. Now I can't imagine her being called anything else. It will get better

CactusAnnie · 02/06/2015 07:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mehitabel6 · 02/06/2015 07:25

Since your DH didn't like it the first time I can't see why it had changed the second time. I also can't see why you wanted it when you had already used a variation as a second name. I expect your SIL thought the same.
Rowan is a lovely name- I assume your DH preferred it anyway.
All our names are compromise ones as we couldn't agree on our first choices. I think it unfair to press for a name that you like and your DH doesn't- or vice versa.

MuttonCadet · 02/06/2015 07:28

I know it's not the point, but Rowan is so much nicer than Rosalie.

Grumpyoldbiddy · 02/06/2015 07:34

You had already used the name for your first even though your husband hated it. Why would anyone think that you would give your second child the same name as your first? (Or is this a thing now?)

Did your husband stop hating it?

Rowan is much nicer.

Let it go

PuppyMonkey · 02/06/2015 07:35

I think you're going way OTT about what is after all a rather boring name. I mean this in a loving way.

Isn't it weird to use it on a second DD when you've already used it as a second name anyway???

Rowan is nice.

00100001 · 02/06/2015 07:36

Good Lord, you could have just called your DD Rosie/Rosa/whatever... Who cares if they have the same name???
They would just get called slight ly different banes when I each others company

HolgerDanske · 02/06/2015 07:37

Tbh I would think it was a bit odd to have a variation of the same name for both your DDs.

Sorry it's upset you so much, though.

00100001 · 02/06/2015 07:38

George foreman called all five of his sons George

BathshebaDarkstone · 02/06/2015 07:45

It's never happened to me, the closest was that I really wanted a particular name for DS but with DH's surname it would have given kids a good excuse for name-calling, so we researched another Anglo-Saxon name.

MamaLazarou · 02/06/2015 07:48

Sorry but you are being over sensitive, OP. There are billions of names!

Mehitabel6 · 02/06/2015 07:49

Nothing to stop cousins having the same name anyway. My mother's favourite cousin has the same name- it has never been thought odd.
I think the fact that your DH didn't like it, and you had already used it, were more to the point.

YonicScrewdriver · 02/06/2015 07:50

Rosalie is a different name to Rosa though. It's horrible to say your brother picked it to kiss your mum's arse. Presumably he and his wife loved it.

YonicScrewdriver · 02/06/2015 07:53

And you made a "mental note" about your next DD's name - did you ever say you might use Rose or Rosa? They know that you liked Rosie and used it as a middle name. They might have thought you'd be pleased a family member was using a similar name - I had boys and I'd've been dead chuffed if my niece was called one of my fave girl names.

diddl · 02/06/2015 08:17

Well if your husband still doesn't like it, it was never going to be used by you anyway, was it?

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