Cruel names

[milnthorpegirl]

When it comes to childrens names, can a name be cruel?
Trying to decide on a name for our baby, and came across Aubrey Willow as the name for a girl. I always thought Aubrey was a boys name? So can the name you choose be cruel to your unborn child?
I am trying to think ahead when they start school, after all other children can bully over names.

Cruella wouldn't be a good choice.

There's a young American actress called Aubrey Plaza. I think it might well be more common in the States as a girl's name than a boy's these days.

If someone living in or planning to move to Scotland called their child Joby, that would be very stupid cruel.

Aubrey or Aubree is a very common girls name in the US. My goddaughter is called Aubree and there are another 2 in her Kindergarten class (South Carolina).

Yes, children do get teased mercilessly about their names - parents should really consider that before using some of the bizarre names that you see - even on Mumsnet .

My ds is an Aubrey, and we only ever get compliments on it. A lot of elderly also mention that they had a relative with the name as it is very old.

When I hear Aubrey, I automatically think it's a girls name and can't imagine it as a boys name tbh…but the only ones I know of are girls in the US so as Profondo and Jabber say, think it is more common as a girls name over there

Children will have no idea if Aubrey is a boys' or girls' name FGS. We have known little boys called Dennis and Terence, for example, and a little girl called Sharday, and another little boy called Zeus, and my children have no idea that those names usually belong to older people, or are usually spelled differently, or are a bit bonkers unusual, and why would they? I suspect there is much, much less bullying by children about names than a lot of people on MN think. I'm a teacher and I've seen a lot of bullying but I'm struggling to think of a single example that was about a name.

I quite like Aubrey. Do you not like Audrey? Willow is gorgeous.

(Sorry, no offence to the names I used for examples by the way!)

Names can be cruel but I wouldn't say your choice. I think using very overtly gendered names is cruel such as a boy called Louise but lots of names fall into the unisex category. I recently met a little girl called James which I think is very sweet.

Certain names are cruel by association, although sometimes this can only be apparent after naming. Adolph is clearly not a good choice but less obviously, amongst my friends and family Toby would be horrendous.

Also you can predict kids. They will tease over anything and you can't predict the future. Amelia is a perfectly normal name but you don't know in the future if something could happen to give it lots of alternate connotations. Go with what you like if it isn't obviously ridiculous.

I like Aubrey for a girl, it's an updated Audrey.

I don't think Aubrey is cruel, unusual but definitely not cruel.

I think names can be though and people should think carefully, I saw a thread on here recently where the woman was planning to call her baby Bunty and with the surname she said I did think that would be very mean if not cruel.

Kids are much more accepting and open minded about names than we think. They generally couldn't care less if their mates are called Aubrey, Adam or Abraham imo.

Sure, if you name your child Poohead, Willy or Cruella, they're likely to get teased. But other than than names are generally accepted.

And if a child becomes the target for teasing, then the name doesn't matter - the bullies will find something regardless!

I hate Aubrey and Rory as girls names, I know they're popular in America, but it sounds so wrong.

I can think of lots of silly names and ugly names but cruel I'm thinking of those white supremacists who called their kids Adolf Hitler and Aryan Nation. Declaring your bigotry through your choice of kids names is backward and cruel.

I think Aubrey sounds nice and not cruel. It is becoming more of a unisex name I think. If you are still struggling with it, how about Audrey or Avery, both of which go well with Willow. Avery was originally a boys name, especially in the US, but is commonly accepted as a girls name now. I love it and would like to use it for DD two if we have one, but for various reasons we can't.

Aubrey was the 15th most popular girls name in the US in 2012, with 8,006 girls given the name. It hasn't ranked as a top 1000 boys name in the US since 2002, and even then it barely made the rankings, with only 171 boys in the whole country that year named Aubrey. (It came in at number 938.) That same year Aubrey was ranked at 196 - for girls - and its been doing handsprings up the charts ever since.

So if you were living or planning to live in the US and named your baby boy Aubrey, that would be rather cruel. (Or at the very least, difficult for him.)

My eldest dd has been teased about her name but only after a teacher mentioned it was a sports stadium in NY. It wasn't relentless or nasty and hasn't done her any harm as she already knew as a few days beforehand she had discovered tge meaning behind her sisters name so we had spent a while going through what the names in our family meant.

A friend of mine recently wanted to call her son David, she was adamant that it was her chosen name and her ds was going to be a happy baby... Until someone pointed out that her last name was Cameron. She changed her mind pretty dam quick!! (I've changed some details including the name of the prime minister!)

Sometimes it's the combination of name and surname which is the problem. So for example, if the policewoman Cressida Dick had a son, she shouldn't call him Issac, or a daughter Ophelia.

I know an Aubrey, he is a very lovely elderly gentleman. I've never heard it used as a girl's name in England.

Yes you don't see many Adolfs or Myras.

I think Aubrey sound more feminine than masculine. I really like it for a girl but DH hated it. I have only known one male Aubrey and he was very effeminate, he was an Pantomime Dame for the local theatre.

I know someone called Chris Peacock, and a Phil McCracken which seem a bit thoughtless, but I suppose they were Christopher and Phillip when they were named.

Someone from college named their baby boy Baby Blue which seems a ridiculous for a Man.

But Aubrey is a male name, historically. It just is.

Some Americans have a tendency to choose very strange names for their children. The use of surnames as first names, particularly for girls. Why, there are so many actual proper names out there, so just why?

Aubrey is the traditional nn for Auberon, King of the Fairies.

I know a couple who called their new born son "Grim".
There was so much shock, horror, refusal to say the name by friends.
He was blonde with lovely blue eyes. Beautiful.
They changed it after a while to Cameron.
He's probably at least 20 now!

Aubrey is certainly a man's name and is not used for women in the uk. Please choose something else.