to query the suggestion that breast milk should be the main part of DS's diet from 6-12 months?

[FionaSH]

to query the suggestion that breast milk should be the main part of DS's diet from 6-12 months?

lal123 I agree - why can't it just be all other dairy products to give the calcium?

Thanks chil1234 I'm sure if i ever have another baby (shudder) I'll be more confident about it all.

Somewhere on the WHO site there is a graph which says (from memory so might be a bit wrong) that 6-8 months solids should make up around 200 cals of their daily intake, 8-10mnths 400cals and 10-12mnths 800cals - or something similar to those figures

Fiona, all your responses to posters suggest you're after a bit of argy-bargy. Why be so sarcastic?

I didn't read OPs responses like that

Time for bed!

Just because the feeds are tailing off now doesn't mean the need for milk won't suddenly return or the interest in solids won't wane temporarily while teething or whatever. If one thing's for sure, with babies nothing's for sure!

I think Rindercella that it may be you wanting to start the argy bargy with your post??

Seeing as there is quite a bit of animosity to bf posts I shall tell you where I'm coming from, so that you may see that I really do just want opinions/advice etc. I am a new mum with an anxiety disorder (so I'm told). Apparently other people don't see danger and risk in everything like I do! Wow that would be so nice, not to be constantly worrying about DS carking it from this that or the other. So when I'm worrying about something I have to find out if Im being daft, or whether it's something joe bloggs would worry about. I'm a joy to live with! My poor DH!!!

Anyway, that's the reason for all the bf posts this week- going through a shocker of a time and am desperately trying to cling on to some vestige of sanity. I know these things queries seem silly but in
my mind it goes from "he's not having enough milk" to "he's going to die" in about 0.5seconds.

Sorry for the long post!

Oh and if I was going to be sarcastic, you'd know about it!!!

Its not just about the calcium though. Breast milk (and formula as it is designed to mimic BM) is the perfect food for baby humans. A piece of cheese or a petit filous aren't quite the same.

Yes, milk should be the main part of the diet from 6 months to about 12 months - this doesn't mean though that they absolutely have to drink as much milk at a year as they did at 6 months - it just means, don't let food replace milk at first, let the food be an exploration until they are showing clear signs of wanting more, if that makes sense. By 12 months it should be roughly 50/50 I think, and then over the next year the milk intake tails off. But all babies are different and don't follow a timetable.

I believe if you are following a routine rather than demand feeding it's best not to drop any milk feeds until 9 months.

" I am a new mum with an anxiety disorder (so I'm told)"

If you struggle with anxiety, (and god knows if anything is going to make us anxious, babies are gold medallists.... ) then be selective about who you express your concerns to.

By which I mean that for any and every aspect of child development, if you ask a question to a lot of random people on a message board you're likely to get a range of different answers and this will - if anything - make you more confused and anxious about the best thing to do rather than less so

So, if you're in two minds about what to do for the best, pick someone who's opinion you trust... a HV, a doctor, a friend, your mother... and use them as your sounding board. The fewer opinions you get, the easier it is to decide.

Obviously, talk to your GP if anxiety starts to become overwhelming or gets in the way of you leading a normal life.

To be honest chil1234, that is where I started, my hv, midwife, breastfeeding counsellor, mum, mil.... They all say different
which the rational side of my brain tells me it really doesn't matter that much, everyone does it differently and their kids are just fine.
The irrational side of my brain made me throw the question open on here to a load of people I font know from Adam, to confuse me further

have put my name down for CBT. I don't want my ds to grow up like me!!!

Follow your LOs lead. If he is refusing the breast when you are offering it then you don't need to worry, he's obviously having enough. If he is pulling at your top and screaming and you are saying 'no you have to eat solids' then you do need to worry (about yourself).

All LOs are different. DD1 stopped asking for feeds when she was 7 months old but would take a feed if offered. I'm sure she was getting most of her calories from food a long time before she was one. On the other hand DD2 demanded 7 (!!!) feeds the day after her first birthday. I doubt she'll be stopping any time soon and milk is still her main source of calories.

"hv, midwife, breastfeeding counsellor, mum, mil.... They all say different"

Just pick one of those people, the one who's opinion you value most, and work with that. Generally speaking, babies are very tough, adaptable little things. Hope the CBT helps you to trust yourself more.

I too have problems with anxiety and depression and can understand exactly where you are coming from with regard to leaping from "he's not getting enough milk to he's going to die in 0.5 seconds" I had many similar concerns with all 3 of my children over lots of issues over the last 8 years. With meds, counselling and a lot of support I am becoming a lot more relaxed and am able rationalise it all.

I hope you get the CBT, don't take no for an answer it took me a couple of years to finally get my course and although I am finding it hard work it is helping me a great deal.

Hi fiona I've seen your posts elsewhere. I hope your DS is better!

As for milk - as someone has said it's not just calcium. It has the right balance of carbs, proteins and fats. As months 6-12 months are about establishing babies onto solids (so there may be setbacks), milk should be given as well.

I think its because the foods we tend to first wean our babies onto are not massively calorific ,like fruit /vegetable puree's and baby rice . If you just ate fruit and veg and a bit of rice you would probably lose weight ,however if you also drank 5 pints of full fat milk ,you would probably gain weight ,do you see what i mean ?
My DS is nearly 7 months and has breakfast which consists of baby rice made up with formula ,plus some fruit puree . He has about 6 oz of milk when he first wakes up , and then he finishes the bottle of formula that i used to make up the baby rice ,but not till about half an hour after breakfast . Lunch he isnt as keen on , he tends to see this time less as a meal and more of a channel for his artistic energies !! Tea is veggie puree and fruit puree ,sometimes i mix the veggie puree with milk and baby rice . My friends baby is slightly younger and has 3 meals a day happily ,another friends baby is a few weeks older and is still very happy with milk and doesnt want any of that mush thankyou very much . All the babies are happy ,healthy and gaining weight ,although i have to admit that i havent had mine weighed since he was about 12 weeks !! shameful mother that i am .

I always found that advice reassuring - my formula fed daughter really didn't get on with solids until at least 10 - 11 months and people like my mum would often suggest I was doing something wrong in not pressing the issue. Knowing that milk provides the main source of nutrition (or: food for fun until they're one, as I was told) helped me to relax about it all.

Havent put in the other milk feeds because i demand feed formula ,having moved onto it from breast feeding ,so there are alot of 3-4 oz snacks ,especially when its been so warm

To me, breast (or formula) milk is much more calorific and much more digestible for babies than alternatives (solids or straight dairy) - so its a way to guarantee they're getting what they need while their systems work out how to cope with solid food. Being willing to shovel lots of food in doesn't necessarily mean a baby is getting much nutrition out of it (just look in the nappy and see what comes out the other end - especially if you do finger food rather than mush!)

If your DS is asking for milk then let him have it - DD was still asking for milk at 2 somedays. For her I think there was a very strong association between milk and drowsiness - she'd never nap if I didn't feed her - and although she'd pretty well stopped napping by 2, a feed was a good chance to have some downtime and a nice cuddle. I also figured BM was still nutritious for her so all in all it worked well for us.

I don't think milk was the main part of ds's diet at that age. He took to weaning very quickly and was on three meals a day from about 7 months, I made him lots of meals containing milk and he ate lots of yoghurt, cheeses etc so was getting his required calcuim. From memory I think he was having a mik feed first thing, the same again in the afternoon and a milk feed before bed. The amount of milk he was having was within the recommended guidelines but the bulk of his calories came from his meals. I just followed his lead, he was much more interested in food at that age than milk.

Brilliant OP, Fiona, thanks - I was wondering this too as I am in the same boat; 8mo ds has gone right off boob, and when he does latch on only stays there for 5mins total (both sides)

I'm just hoping he gets more than I think. I did wonder about cutting back on solids to get him to feed more, but it feels 'wrong'

He has about 3 feeds a day, sometimes more (but then they'll be little ones)

I think you'd know if there was a problem (that's what I tell myself) - they'd be fussing etc

It's sad but I find myself longing for a year to be up so I don't have to worry about it so much; which is silly as they still need milk!

Well, from that list... there was a whole heap of nonsense spouted in the 70s from what I can gather. From weaning at 8 weeks to formula feeding so you could be sure exactly what they drank, to feeding 4-hourly which made your milk supply drop off, to putting your 2-minute old baby down so s/he wouldn't become "clingy" to all sorts of stuff.

So the nearer your sources of info are to those glory days, the more I would bear that in mind.

Which isn't before I get jumped on - to say that people who were doing their job / mothering around those times can't now give excellent advice - just that if their experience / training started and stopped around then, they may tell you things that current information refutes.

And re. the anxiety - babies won't starve themselves when food is readily available. They don't feed intellectually, as adults do "I'm busy, I'll drink later" or "I'd better not have that, I had a big lunch" they just do what comes naturally. Trust your baby. And yourself.

The only thing you need to be slightly wary of is your baby's salt intake (1g a day). I only mention this because bacon is quite salty.

One thing that it took me a long time to realise is how quickly and efficiently babies can feed once they are bigger and more practiced at it. I worried constantly about my ds (pfb) and he was rubbish at eating solids and spent hours of wasted time fretting about this big bonny boy he is still fussy at nearly 6 yrs but a healthy lad nonetheless.

Experience with my two further children has taught me that a healthy child won't starve herself. So I stopped going to the HV stopped asking for advice, no longer look up guidelines and am much more relaxed as a result.
Breastmilk is still a large part of dd2 diet at 20 months other children wean earlier as long as the diet is Balanced there is nowt to worry about