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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that as I was formula-fed....

64 replies

Snobear4000 · 01/07/2010 01:05

...um... actually I don't have anything to say about that as it's really not very important what I ate decades ago and for how long.

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 01/07/2010 08:37

ok i'll leave it that while for any individual there are many factors that dictate their health in adulthood, obviously, at a population level there are differences between bf and ff.

otchayaniye · 01/07/2010 08:38

gobsmackedetal

You are right, and I feel ashamed of myself that I even bothered to answer. I don't actually care that much.

Sometimes I think these threads are created by a mumsnet algorithm, designed to boost post count on slow days.

pommedeterre · 01/07/2010 08:39

chicken - I love the taste of cow and gate, always put a little more on my hand than necessary so I get a good slurp too!

StealthPolarBear · 01/07/2010 08:39

ooh conspiracy theories....

DuelingFanjo · 01/07/2010 08:41

"as it's really not very important"

important enough for a thread?

TrillianAstra · 01/07/2010 08:47

What SPB said.

DF I think the point is that she wants to have a thread saying 'BF/FF is not important'

sunny2010 · 01/07/2010 08:50

At the end of the day what does it matter? Once they hit 18 the vast majority will be eating junk food and binge drinking! There are bigger things in life to worry about to me than bf/ff.

thatsnotmymonkey · 01/07/2010 08:52

I don't think anyone here is judging their mums at all, in fact I can see nothing but a sense of slight sadness that the advice given to some posters mums was poor.

BF/FF, it does matter, and it is complex and heated and emotional. Am I less of a person because I was FF, well how the flip will I ever know? But given the masses of scientific evidence out there, I am pleased that I have been able to BF my DS and am continuing to do so into his toddler hood.

mamatomany · 01/07/2010 08:55

My sister and I were placed on our stomachs to sleep and didn't die from cot death, our mother also smoked whilst holding us but i shall not be doing either it's called progress.

MathsMadMummy · 01/07/2010 08:58

I don't think anyone is blaming mums - at least they shouldn't be. people do the best they can with the information/support they are given - or in many cases, the lack of it

thesecondcoming · 01/07/2010 09:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

slouchingtowardswaitrose · 01/07/2010 10:03

I am not happy I was FF.

I am not happy my mother was bullied by my grandfather who told her I must have colic because her milk was bad.

I am not happy no one told her that spraying during letdown was not a sign of too much milk.

I am not happy that she was unable to feed me in public.

I am not happy that she didn't know my feeding pattern would become more regular and less frequent after 6 weeks, and that her engorgement/leaking would soon resolve.

I am not happy that my childhood health, current health and future health will be affected by my mother's 'choice' to FF.

I am not happy that my mother's risk of certain cancers is increased because she only BF me for a few weeks and didn't BF my sister even once.

I am grateful as hell I was able to have her colostrum.

I do care. Very, very much.

slouchingtowardswaitrose · 01/07/2010 10:06

Do I blame or resent my mother? Of course not.

Does she regret not having BF me for longer?

Of course she does. Does she beat herself up about it? No, and shouldn't.

Would she BF another child? Yes. Did she support me to BF, because she had learned more (mainly from me)? Yes. Despite giving me a negative view of BFing for my whole life until I gave birth and did it myself.

Her own mother BF for years, but my mother wasn't living there when I was born, so didn't receive the right support.

It's sad.

tutusare4 · 01/07/2010 10:14

I was FF.
I am overweight, have oodles of allergies and asthma.
Is it the fault of FF?
Who knows, as my twin was also FF, and is thin as a rake and has no health problems.

Do I care? Not really. Life is too short to beat yourself up about something you can't do anything about.

When it comes down to it, adults today put themselves at risk by smoking and drinking too much. So why consider the fact that being FF has put anyone at risk, when everyday living is probably far more dangerous.

Mingg · 01/07/2010 10:14

YANBU at all - main thing is you got fed.

honeydragon · 01/07/2010 10:17

hang on a minute,weren't we all weaned early too? Does that mean we are all obese with allergies?

My mum read the daily mail when my brother was born, but had moved onto to the telegaraph by the time I was 9 years later. Did this affect our early childhood? He was ff I was bf. We both have successfully managed to drive her bonkers over the last 40 years .

In 20 years time will our children be blaming Mumsnet for neglect in the early years,and swear they would never join a parenting cult forum?

wahwah · 01/07/2010 10:19

Plumm I'm not claiming poor health as a result of formula feeding, but I do have terminal cancer!!!! I suspect it's not related unless I got a poisoned batch! I
Don't really have an axe to grind about how people feed their children, it's good that there are choices and alternatives, but I just feel a bit sorry for my Mum feeling like a failure.

Original poster
Snobear4000 · 01/07/2010 10:47

Good God, they all took the bait.

OP posts:
thatsnotmymonkey · 01/07/2010 10:55

What did you expect Snobear?

JuicyLips · 01/07/2010 11:01

Im a triplet and very premature when born. We were FF and im just thankful we were fed.

wahwah · 01/07/2010 11:03

Aren't you clever? Perhaps you have little sense of a generation of mothers who were treated badly and upset, but as long as you get a nice warm feeling of superiority, then it's all good. Please let me know if I misunderstood your comments as I wouldn't want to be horrible if if wasn't your intention to be patronising

thesecondcoming · 01/07/2010 11:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thatsnotmymonkey · 01/07/2010 11:12

snobear all the threads you are on at the mo are in AIBU?, I think he is spoiling for a bun fight or something?

This is rather unusual, to start such a thread, and be so invested in it, when apparently it matters not a jot to you.

MathsMadMummy · 01/07/2010 11:15

I am very confused...

and there was me being impressed at a FF/BF thread which didn't get ratty. Oops.

wahwah · 01/07/2010 11:15

Someone needs a big hug. Snobear, sorry for your pain. Go for a nice walk and think happy thoughts.

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