To think BF-ing a 2yr old is, um, weird?

[Lucy85]

Well what do you think? I know it's a very emotive subject, but I've seen it a couple of times and it makes me come over all strange.
I BFed my baby exclusively until 7 months when I went back to work, but the thought of doing it now is just plain odd, - not wrong, it's just I can't imagine doing it to someone who can walk, talk, get their own drinks, eats proper food and is too big to lie sideways on my lap.

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Mingg, seriously? That was the ONLY reason she chose to carry on? I find that hard to believe.

Even then I doubt she forced her ds to feed in which case it wasn't only for the mother. yes there are benefits to every mum otherwise why would we do it because we like to be martyrs.

I am very sorry about your loss Sassy.

I think it is lovely she pitied the other children who were forced to "go with out"

Bertie - yes, she was quite happy telling everyone who wanted to know (or not) how much extra she could eat and not gain any weight "all because of breastfeeding". Her husband eventually gave their son a milkshake and that was the end of it as the son then refused breast milk.

Slushy - no, she did not force her son but she did not offer him any alternatives either.

I think many people's gut reaction (including my own before i had a child) is a conditioned response to how British society expects women's breasts to be sexualised and children to be independent from the mother as soon as possible.

It's sad that a very natural and healthy act is treated with hostility in Britain.

I hope the OP feels wierd enough about it to do some of her own research about Bf and maybe she'll no longer feel that way.

I saw your other thread to sassy and for what it is worth, I am very sorry for your loss.

Really mingg well I certainly would not do that to my dc.

Force breastfeeding. It must involve rope and a complicated rope and pulley mechanism, twinned with a Tongue depressor and pump.

patents

You find it weird that a two year old is breastfed? Really? Two is so little, I find it weird that you think that bfing a 2 year old is weird.

"no, she did not force her son but she did not offer him any alternatives either."

So she offered him no solid foods or drink at all? Ever?

AIBU to find it selfish and drone like when mothers don't BF their toddlers?

yikes....this is one of those issues where the viewer/public/bystander/whatever feels uncomfortable about witnessing extended bf and so feels they have to do this transference thing where they have to criticise the mother to take attention away from the fact they feel squeamish and therefore embarrassed about it.

Unfortunately comments from mothers like Minshu - getting teary eyed at the thought of stopping b/f don't help the cause that it is not about the mother.

Because Minshu is not saying I want all the benefits for the child, or it's convenient or it's free or anything, it's how she feels, it's her feelings not the child.

Also the argument that it is not anyone else's business what anyone else does with their child isn't strictly true. If a child is clinically obese due to diet, and the mother is sat their feeding it muffins, fast food etc, I would not think ooh look at that mother, she has the child's best interest at heart.

If a parent was repremanding their child by seriously berating it, I would not think nothing to do with me it's up to the parent how the child is raised.

I'm not saying this is the case with b/f but I do not think the argument, as long as its not your child, someone can do as they please is the right argument.

"Slushy - no, she did not force her son but she did not offer him any alternatives either"
why should she offer alternatives? breastfeeding is GOOD for children and there isn't anything wrong with it, there isn't any need to offer alternatives unless the mother or the child want to stop

we aren't saying the mother gets NOTHING from it - that would be a shame really - personally i enjoy the peaceful feeling and the oxyticin is definitely nice
i also love seeing ds2's sleepy happy face with his eyes closing at the end of the day - he's doing it right now
i am sure some mothers do enjoy the extra calories they can eat - the protection against breast cancer - the extra cuddles and the good feeling that you are providing something wonderful for your child - i hope every mother gets SOMETHING from it
what we are arguing against is the bizarre proposition that it is "all for the mother"

so she has found a way to bf without getting any nutrients into the child? without cuddling and comforting him with her skin and her smell and the sweet taste? without any of the many many emotional and physical benefits that breastfeeding a baby, and later a toddler, conveys?

Sassysusan - what a lovely post about your precious DD.

OP - if you had asked AIBU to stop bfing my child at 7 months? the answer would be no, just as I am not being unreasonable to bf my 2yo, and my SIL was not being unreasonable to bottle feed her baby from 2 weeks. There is nothing weird about bfing an older child, and how you feed your child is a matter of individual choice.

Haven't bothered reading all these posts - but I bf my DD until she was 2.5 yrs old and it was my choice to stop. I thought she would have happily carried on and surprised me a bit a few days ago by asking if she could have a feed again.
Its not for everyone, but its sad to call it weird.

rainbowfizz i was sad when ds1 chose to stop breastfeeding
it was a beautiful thing that we both enjoyed very much and i felt sad that this lovely phase of my life was over
i posted about it on here and received nothing but kindness and understanding from many posters, some of whom i know would never take the choice to bf an older child themselves as it would not be something they felt comfortable with
they showed me compassion and i will not forget it
i know they got what i was feeling - sadness for a part of motherhood that was ending - they didn't twist it into something derogatory about me carrying on for my own purposes

ming do you actually know that person? because that exact same thing was on desperate housewives a few yrs back, a work college was bf an older child to lose the calories then lynette (i think it was..) gave a chocolate milk and he didnt bf again...
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i dont think bf til 2 or around that age is weird, many of my friends have done it. but i only bf mine as quite young babies, so think of bf my toddler would be really weird, but for others who do it then good for them

when people say they think its for the mums benefit i dont think they mean in a sexual way, thats a really gross suggestion! i always took it as like they mean the mum doesnt want to let them grow up, wants to feel needed or something like that. not that i think thats always the case, maybe a few people not the majority

Fair enough, everyone is entitled to their veiws, why are people swearing and being rude to the op, a simple YABVU would do and explain yourself properly. I do feel like that when I hear or see children who are 3+ being bf. Those who are being rude about it have something to be about me thinks.

I had my first child in Spain where it was and is completely normal to bf children until they self-wean. My office at work (in a v male-dominated finance firm) was full of breastmilk expressed by working mothers. When I had my second child in UK I couldn't believe people's abhorrence at bfing in general and extended bfing in particular.

I still cannot see why anyone would bother having an opinion on how long you choose to bf your child for (unless they are feeling particular insecure about their own feeding choices).