to think I will never be able to live in Cornwall again unless we live in a tent and clean toilets for a living?

[livethedream]

(Have name changed for this one as am currently bleating on a lot about this in real life.)

I used to live in Cornwall when I was in my twenties but I accidentally moved away, met DH, had children and am now stranded in the town I grew up in anD I hate it.

I dream of going back to Cornwall and bringing up the DSs there, and decided to focus on making it happen and we have been looking for a job there for DH who does IT support. There is nothing advertised, ever and we've been looking for nearly two years.

He could take a lesser job and pay he was on 15 years ago, which would then put us in a rubbish position to get a mortgage, or we could resign ourselves to never buying and rent something very cheap whilst we both do random minimum wage work to make ends meet.

I dunno, on the one hand I feel like if we want it enough we could make it happen, but then in reality I just don't see how. Shoudl I just accept this and go and live somewhere I like much less but where employment isn't nigh on impossible?

literally on the path?!!

I can't go, dd is not in a good place at mo so can't make plans. Sounds great tho, really love Doves, and have heard enough of M + Sons to know i'd like them live too.

Excellent life for children in the south west. Absolutely.

Not so good for teenagers. Don't underestimate the drug problem. I live in the middle of Gloucester, unbelievable there are less issues re drugs here than there were in coastal Devon. DD goes there to spend hols with my mum, she came back with tales of loads of her mates who are on mephadrone, E and pot. because it is classed as a 'safe' area, people are a lot more lax with where their teenagers go and what they do. There are no provisions for teenagers where I used to live, all amenities were miles away, with no public transort. Drugs were bad when I was a kid in Devon however it seems a lot worse now. You can buy an E for a quid, by all accounts.

Drugs are everywhere, though. I grew up in the 4th largest city in the US and, even in the mid-80s, it was awash with drugs.

Some people are inclined to do drugs, others aren't.

But it's all over the place no matter where you go, sadly.

The teenagers I know, in the Exeter area and the villages around, seem to have a great time. Lots of surfing and outdoor pursuits, also the, ahem, cultural and social highights of Exeter.

If it was that bad for teenagers in the SW then they wouldn't all be complaining about having to move away to get jobs etc as young adults. you don't get anyone complaining about moving away from where I grew up (Wiltshire - growing up in a cornfield miles from anywhere makes Devon look very happening).

You can obtain drugs almost anywhere, that's for sure, but your inclination to do drugs will be highly dependent on the other opportunities available to you.

I am also a bit dubious of the "great for children, not so great for teens" thing. If you prepare your primary-aged children (and that requires amenities), they should have enough occupations and skills to see them through the teenage years. It's all very well bringing children up in the countryside, where they can dam streams, have picnics, swim in the sea etc. But they also really need to be learning the foundations for sports, dance, drama, music, art etc that will occupy them as teenagers.

lol, you can do those arty things too you know, it's not all Swallows and Amazons. There are many many facets of life and many locations in the south west. One needs to choose appropriately.

the SW is stuffed full of artists and writers and musicians. it's like a magnet for them. That's another thing I like about it. you can't move for tripping over artists' studios. our local farm is an arts commune too with loads of activities for children. I know it's a bit different from hanging out at the major national art galleries (which we go to big cities to do) but there's certainly no shortage of people who spend their lives being artists/musicians/writers.

There is probably a great difference in moving to a small rural town when you are an adult, as opposed to growing up there where you are always regarded as someone's granddaughter/daughter/sister/whatever, and everyone knows (and insists on knowing) your business.

I like the anonmyty of living in a city tbh.

people who keep mentioning the cinema...there are alternatives. we have a village film club and a village children's cinema using a projector and huge sceen in the village hall. I've never been to the film club but the kids one is brilliant - there's a little sweet stall and the kids all sit on mats at the front and share their sweets. The adults sit at the back drinking tea and eating cake sold by the local Guide group. it costs £3 and they have a raffle for charity. it's less than 5 mins walk from my house - and from virtually everyone's in the village. and if people have got jobs to get on with and don't want to stay we keep an eye on each others' kids. you see...when things aren't there on a plate people get a bit creative and work out interesting - and often better - ways of getting them.

Become a traveller. We were down Cornwall last month and it seemed most lay-bys and council car parks had traveller camps.
They get the lifestyle without any worries about mortgages.
Not the ethnic gypsies or Irish travellers, just people who live in big buses.

Boiled Egg - Tavi is hellishly expensive compared with just over the border though. My house in the Tamar Valley would be worth an extra £50k if it was up Whitchurch Road.

Bonsoir - an ipod can be used anywhere, as can a pad and a pencil to draw. Can't see ds going for dance really, and the electronic gadgets are pretty transportable too.I find school work occupies ds greatly as well; and I think too many after school activities are counter productive as teens need down time where they can just read or chat to their families.

Drugs are everywhere, so that depends on how the kids are brought up and how much pocket money they get!

scary, you might be right about Tavi, it seems a nice place relative to the average cost of rent for a family home, and it's so close to the moor. Some friends are moving to that area very soon from a more expensive area of Devon and they looked at Cornwall but decided they weren't sure if they could face the toll bridge over to Plymouth and back twice a day.

There's so much to consider isn't there? Exciting though...

Don't know waht to suggest but just had to have a quick LOL at 'moved away accidentally'.

Yep, reminds me that line in Withnail and I...

"Help! We've gone on holiday by mistake!"

Evening!

Mila - have emailed you DH's CV, thank you!

Orm no work developments as yet - the really good job in St Austell did not seem to come up when DH clicked the link so he'll have to contact the agency direct. He's seen a job in Taunton, which sounds alright and would mean we could live in some wild and lovely bit of Somerset and much closer to Cornwall than we are now?

I'm just gettign so impatient = we've been working on this for over a year and it's all such slow going. Really don't want to get DS settled into school and then have to move him. Really hope all this putting thoughts and threads out into the ether pays off soon!

santimoanyarse- we love wales -wd like to re locate thee in a few years - cant think re near 3 cities -were are you .we thinking of pembrokeshire ..maybe you higher up..

Lived and grew up in and around Penzance-miss Cornwall terribly and would loved to have had the opportunity for my DD to grow up down there.

Sadly it's not to be hubby has an engineering career and theres just nothing down there without a ball achingly long commute.

I spend a lot of time down there in the winter and you have to remeber how utterly desolate it can be.

Boiled Egg - the bridge isn't too bad, I did it every day for 8 years; if they lived Tamar Valley way they could chose the bridge or the road in from Tavi, and if Torpoint, use the ferry.

Tavi is expensive for buying at least - that's the reason we bought in the Tamar Valley - 10 minutes from Tavi in the car, and at the time around £100k cheaper!

£100k is a massive saving Scary and if it was me I would def consider it. The Tamar valley is very pretty. My friends aren't in a position to buy at the moment though unfortunately.

It is pretty, and I miss it. I bounce in the car when we go back, and see the hills (Belgium is flat where we live) and the moor and my Mum.

OOOh, Dh has finally found an agency who have some suitable vacancies - he's applied for 2 in ST Austell and one in Taunton. FIngers crossed for us everyone!

Hey excellent, crossing fingers and toes for you.

Livethedream...dont forget if you need any advice on employers in that area (ST A)I have local knowledge and can tell you if they have a good reputation.

dietcoke - thank you! That's really kind - I'll find out who the jobs are with on Monday hopefully so I will be picking your brains...

I like this thread. It's making me feel positive and spurring me on.

Well - just to update, it is taking an agonising amount of time to get any feedback from the angency DH has just applied with. But hoping to hear something today at least (even just confirmation that he'll be put forward!)