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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wish you could buy father's day cards that say...

80 replies

bintofbohemia · 14/06/2010 13:59

"Thanks for screwing me up big time and not giving the faintest shit about me, but here's a card anyway because if I don't send one there will be hell."

I wouldn't bother but he did cut the lawn recently so it wouldn't be fair to say he never does a thing for me.

I could do without stressing my head over this every year.

OP posts:
AlaskaNebraska · 14/06/2010 14:37

lol at AFs last line.

dont think he wil be rushing to the phone

HowAnnoying · 14/06/2010 14:37

Dear Dad

You're a cunt. The sooner you drink yourself six foot under the better.

AnyFucker · 14/06/2010 14:38

Hey, I made up that heartwarming little ditty in 2 minutes flat !!

JackBauerDeservedAHappyEnding · 14/06/2010 14:39

Yes laugh at my misfortune AN

Seriously though, I am tempted to send it...except I have no clue where he is!

AnyFucker · 14/06/2010 14:42

HA...yes, so with you on that one

Unfortunately he has decided to live a healthier life recently

He is doing that just to fucking wind me up!

I hope no-one who has lost a lovely dad comes onto this thread (as would be very upsetting)...but seriously, some father's do not deserve the children they were blessed with

JackBauerDeservedAHappyEnding · 14/06/2010 14:42

Oh no, now I want HA's

Do you think he woudl be confused if I hunt him down just to send him fatehr's day cards like this though?
Maybe a fathers day book of poetry.

A father like you
would be hard to replicate
well thank fuck for that.

teaandcakeplease · 14/06/2010 14:42

Ahh yes been struggling over buying a card for my H from the DCs and not wanting to, here's what I'd like to say:

Dear Dad

Happy Fathers Day, thanks for leaving us and mum for a 21 year old slapper. No present obviously, just a card. Mum couldn't bring herself to buy anything saying "Brilliant, Wonderful, Great" on it as you're not; leaving us for a 21 yr old is none of those.

Love DCs x

Could you improve it AF?

JackBauerDeservedAHappyEnding · 14/06/2010 14:45

Oh but isn't it nice to be able to vent a bit?
I don't like to talk to my mum about him as it upsets us both.

If anyone with a lovely father does end up on the thread, hopefully it wil make you appreciate them even more!

AnyFucker · 14/06/2010 14:45

oh, goody, I am laughing now

thanks for starting this thread, BOB

was feeling a bit shit (like I do every year towards the middle of June)

I certainly would like to work on that, tea but gotta head off in a minute

Yours says what it needs to say though, very succintly

Will you buy him a card from the kids ?

JackBauerDeservedAHappyEnding · 14/06/2010 14:51

I don't think that needs improvement tea, sounds just about right.

I am so lucky in that my FIL is fantastic so I do buy him a fathers day card, but always have a twinge that I only need one.

thanks a lot dear dad
for spending all our money
on foreign rent boys

ShirleyKnot · 14/06/2010 14:51

Got the ideal one for you OP

you could change the dad to arsehat if you wanted to?

ShirleyKnot · 14/06/2010 14:52

boo, it didn't work.

SagacityNell · 14/06/2010 14:53

i wat one that says "fuck off you nobber"

JackBauerDeservedAHappyEnding · 14/06/2010 14:54

Short sweet and to the point, like it sn

JuicyLips · 14/06/2010 14:57

my dad isnt bad, but he was distant when we were growing up, and now he lives in Tasmania so see him once or twice a year. Sent him a card with a pick of the dgc's on it. Lets face it, he could do with a reminder of what they look like.

SomeGuy · 14/06/2010 14:59

My Dad says Father's Day is a modern commercialised concotion and that we should ignore it entirely.

JackBauerDeservedAHappyEnding · 14/06/2010 15:03

Dear Father.
I hope you feel special on Father's day, it must be exhausting being a cunt 364 days of the year, you deserve a day off.

Poledra · 14/06/2010 15:10

God, some of these are funny (though I realise that that is not the main point of the thread).

I do have a great dad who also never expects a Fathers' Day card as he think it's a lot of shite ("save yer money and buy me a decent bottle of wine next time I'm visiting, Pol." He gleefully ignores the price difference between a card and a decent bottle of wine.......)

And yes, I am now appreciating my dad more.

Original poster
bintofbohemia · 14/06/2010 15:28

SagacityNell - the beauty of Moonpig is I bet you could get one. And if you do, show me!

(Feelign much cheerier now!)

OP posts:
Aeschylus · 14/06/2010 15:37

I have the upmost sympathy for you guys here, my DW every year has the tears and heart break of a fuck wit dad who would quite honestly rather she did not exist, seen our DC once despite living 12 miles away.

Yet everyyear she sends him a card, why I have no Idea.

My Father who is fantastic just asks for a quid! instead of a card

Eglu · 14/06/2010 15:43

This year I have decided not to send my Dad a fathers day card because, he can't be bothered to contact me. He always forgets my birthday. Was just recently.

If I send him a card it will remind him to contact me again and I really don't want that. For some stupid reason I still feel guilty about it though.

ItsAllTurnedToShit · 14/06/2010 15:48

I sent my dad one once which was a black and white retro picture of two kids looking at a broken car:
"piston broke"
"my dad's the same"
Plucked up the courage to send it, never mentioned it. Some jokes are just wasted (s'cuse the pun). Bit too close to home me thinks.

SomeGuy · 14/06/2010 16:10

cards cost about as much as a crap bottle of wine, it's outrageous!

SagacityNell · 14/06/2010 18:06

testing

clpsmum · 14/06/2010 18:30

Go to www.moonpig.com and personalise your cards with that wording i dare you, i would love to see his reaction when he opened it, am pmsl just thinking of it!!!!