right to be fed up or being a paranoid jealous girlfriend?

[digggers]

Been with my dp 2 1/2 years, we met at festivals and parties, being hedonistic together. I was always his party girl. Got pregnant really quick, both our lives changed. We now have a one year old, the last year or so has been amazing, we're happy, in love and love our son. Things are good.

Since ds has been born, neither of us has been out much, and haven't really been able to let our hair totally down. DP has been brilliant, totally there for me and ds and gave up his friends, moved cities, barely goes out anymore. He's had maybe a dozen nights out without us. We still go to festivals, but take the baby so don't party at them like we did. I don't really go out atall anymore, breastfeeding, so have decided to not indulge like I did until not feeding my son anymore. He's also been sensitive to dairy so I've not been able to leave him with formula.

This weekend just gone Lots of dp's best friends, his brother were going to a festival he loves, so I suggested he go alone and I'd stay home and look after bambino, so he could really party for the first time in a year. I love him, I want him to have fun.

In the end he also had to go away for work for the week before, so he was away 7 nights in total. So I've found the last week tiring and stressful, managing work, childcare and baby alone. Am knackered. But wanted him to have fun. He got back last night, had an ace time.

I'm hurt though, because when he was telling me about it , it became apparent he spent alot of the festival hanging out with a girl I know he fancies and was into before we got together. Despite there being a dozen other close friends and his brother there, he apparently hung out with her and her friends all Saturday night , through to Sunday morning, crashed in her tent and sat around with her in her tent (and a couple of her friends) all Sunday until he left at teatime. His phone was out of battery all day, i was trying to ring him and was worried. Our son was poorly, nothing serious top teeth coming in and a cold, but very draining me. I'd texted him about it on saturday night and he'd just replied "oh dear, i'm doing great, give him a kiss from me"He didn't even ring on sunday to see how me and ds were. Just sat around on this girl's tent. Apparently he "couldn't be bothered" going to the car to charge it.

Now I trust him, am not thinking that anything happened with this girl. He came home when he said he would, and hasn't tried to hide anything from me. Was my idea he went in first place. And am aware he was wrecked on saturday, and hungover Sunday and that was part of the experience.

But am hurt that out of everyone he could of hung out with, he hung out with the lass he fancied. Also the prettiest, singlest girl there. Yesterday when I was trying to get hold of him o rang his brother and lots of his friends and none of them had seen him since Saturday. Aibu to be hurt? I don't think he's cheated, or was even intending too. But am fed up. Why couldn't he have just hung out with all his friends or brother, and sat around in their tents all sunday? why did he have to be with this lass? I will admit i'm jealous. I was always his festival girlfriend.

He says he feels like I'm grilling him, being paranoid ad jealous, and making him feel like he has to hide stuff from me in the future in order not to hurt me!

Wrong or not?

Cheers, that's good to hear. And thank you fir the empathy.

We're taking ds to Glastonbury next week, umpteenth time at Glastonbury, but first time in family field. Ds's fifth festival and first Glastonbury. We've already decided to give each other a night off. Need to think it thru a bit now, make sure I don't get upset there, some chat about what is and isn't cool.

Anytips for taking a one year old to Glastonbury Jen? Already giddy with excitement about bodger and badger!

By the way, just to say that I'm well chugged to find such excellent advice and empathy from folk on my wavelength! Thank you xx maybe see some of yous at a festival some day x

Haha, I have found festivals are a great place to have massive fallings out with your DP, whether you have kiddies or not (and I know a lot of other people share the same sentiment!). There should be a festival relationship survival guide!

Well your DS maybe a bit young to fully appreciate the kids field but the Green Kids field is a lush place to hang out with really little kids (just up past the Tiny Tea Tent on the right, above the Greenpeace tent). They have a sandpit there and lots of pretty things to look at, and the Rinky Dink goes round once in a while which little kids love. I've always met some really nice people to chat to there. In that same area is the Cat in the Hat cafe which sells really kiddy friendly food at very reasonable prices.

Make sure you take a 3 wheeler pram (preferably a jogger one if you can get hold of one), as if it's muddy the stroller types are cack. Also DS is young enough that you should both be able to go wandering about at night if he will sleep in his buggy, put him in his jimmy jammies and make him all snuggly and then all you have to do is put him in bed when you get back. I used to have fairy lights with a battery pack that I would put around DD's pram so that muntered people didn't crash into it in the dark.

It's funny you should mention bodger and badger, I have a funny story to tell about bodger. I used to work in a festival office for 3 years (all pre DD), and the bookings for performers etc were all dealt with months in advance. Then about a week before the festival, bodger phoned up to see if him and badger could come and do a show! I nearly fell off my chair as I couldn't believe I was talking to one of my childhood heroes! So anyway, even though I had been saying a flat no to people for months, I wangled it so that he could come. He was very grateful and told me to come and say hello to him at the festival. It turned out that he was camping next to some friends of mine who also work in the kids field, and they knew him quite well. So he came out partying with us and without going into too much detail as I don't want a scandalous headline appearing in tomorrow's Sun, let's just say he knows how to party! Shattered a few childhood illusions I can tell you! Eventually, whilst walking through a dark field, he suddenly disappeared, he was there one minute then gone the next. Think he might have fallen in the ditch but not too sure. I gather he turned up again at some point the next day!

You'll have a ball, just make sure with DP that the 'night off' extends to at least 12pm the next day, otherwise it's not a night off it's a bloody wind up.

Kind of wish I was going now! It's my first year off ever, but I did Glastonbury when 8 months pg with DD and it was bloody hard work! Now that I am 6 years older I think it would kill me!

Oh, and one more thing, get one of those all in one waterproof suits and then if it does get muddy DS won't be confined to his buggy, they have been a godsend for DD the last few years. Usually got mine quite cheap on ebay.

Cheers Jen! Yep we have the three wheeler, fairy lights and all on one waterproofs from previous outings. He's been to plenty festivals now, and has so far obliged with taking his night time sleeps on the pram. Good call on the cat in the hat and pirate ship! And I love the rinky dink! I often spend an afternoon chasing them round myself!

I know how you feel about missing it, I felt the same last year when ds was 8 weeks. It was just too far and too expensive last year. But we're on for a glorious return I hope. Hope you don't miss it to much, I'll have a pear cider for you and wish your bambino a safe arrival.

Whereabouts in cockmill meadow is best do you think. And do you think tis cool for a couple of friends to camp with us even tho they don't have kids?

Excited!!!!

Hilarious about bodger! Reminds me of the story I could tell about trev and simon!

Hey diggers, why not both go to Guilfest? We took our DS 1 there and had a blast!

You may even concieve digger junior mark 2!

gosh i hope not. no conceiving going on round here for a while i can tell you. guilfest is on my list, not been there yet. We've a few lined up this summer!

just seen the tent girl's photo's on facebook, she looks very pretty and good fun to be around, but there are no photos of my DP in her set. Which is good, I think.

Glastonbury excitement has cheered us both up no end. Got our new double sleeping bag this afternoon, which is so cosy! Feeling much better. I hate arguments.

You've all helped me feel much better through this little wobble. thank you ! x

I've always had a caravan or truck in crew camping but I think anywhere in the Family Camping is fine, though personally I wouldn't want to be right next to the main drag as it's quite busy all day and night. I noticed last year that it filled up really quickly in the family area, so you may want to get there on Weds if you can to bagsy a space. By Weds eve it was pretty full. It will be fine for your friends to camp with you, lots of people do this (and lots of people who don't even have anything to do with anyone with kids also camp there as they know it will be quieter and safer - prob why it fills up so quick).

Hope you have a wicked time!

diggers you sound great and so does your dp

Yeah it is kind of cliquey, it's the same old heads there year after year on the crew, and it seems a lot easier to get in if you live locally (I am in Somerset). Ex DP is the guy who does the big chainsaw carvings (like the griffin in the stone circle field, the scorpion at the entrance to the green fields a few years ago etc). He used to get on site in April and work his nuts off right until the show and all he would get is free meals and passes! But his carvings would be one of the most talked about things of the festival, doesn't seem fair when Banksy got hundreds of thousands of pounds for chopping up a few portaloos! So now he just does crew work on the infrastructure side of things as at least he gets paid.

If you can come up with a really original idea and submit it to the festival office in the new year, you stand a chance of getting in but so many people apply so it's hard. They are always looking for unique stuff though so it's worth a try. Another option is volunteering for bin painting/flag pole painting/bench painting, but you have to do 10 days work and all you get is meals and a ticket so it's slave labour really, and hard if you have DC! You would also need to be able to get on site early June.

You're right, the build up is the best bit, me and ex DP would literally be the first on site in April, the grass would still be knee high and the cows were still in the fields! And would get better and better over the weeks as more friends who we hadn't seen for ages turned up and the festival started to take shape. It was always a bit of an annoyance when the punters turned up!

Spa day - excellent idea and great start

And bubble bath and blow job combo? My OH would think I'd had my meds adjusted if he got such an enthusiastic reception after he'd been on a bender lol Cup of tea and a couple of anadin maybe he he

Can't wait til our wee one is big enough to take to a festival - we were all set for Glasto this year (my first time there!) and now I'm 30 weeks preg so we decided to sell tickets. Boo!! Summer 2012 tho, hopefully. Hopefully!!

Boundary chat sounds like a good idea as well, at least if you have some boundaries established then it's easier for you both to know what's expected and where you both stand. Glad you've been able to chat it through, hope you have a lovely, chilled summer ahead

hey, i withdrew my post up there as I realised I wrote something in it that could easily indentify me to folk I know read this forum, and I didn;t want to embaress my DP. I was just saying thanks for the compliment, and saying how much I loved working at glastonbury and that I'd love to work there again, but be more involved creatively,

Jen, I think I emailed your ex DP a couple of years ago when I was looking for advice on how to break into making art for festivals! I love his stuff, amazing. Must be such hard work though, and although there's payment in passion alone, i can see how the banksy thing must have been galling.

Think I've probably been in touch with everyone arty at glastonbury at some point though.. haha. Yes, I was on that trip before getting pregnant, trying to build up contacts and submit proposals.Then have been distracted somewhat, I'll get into again, feeling the sap rising.
I'd love to do anything really, bin painting would be a fine start. I'd love to work in the kids field too, I teach art in galleries for a living, so i'd be in my element. I'll jus need to get onto it again later in the year and keep trying. Cliques are only cliques until you break into them :-)

And yes I know what you mean, I remember watching the punters spread across all the lush green space on wednesday morning with a bit of sadness. Are you going to take the wee one to any festivals at the end of the summer?

Thanks Little miss! Yes, looking forward to the spa day too. DP bought me it last year for my birthday, but I've not got round to taking it yet. Now is the perfect time. How old is your wee one? It's obviously a personal thing as to what your comfortable with, but DS came with us to his first at 17 days old. And it was so easy as he was so sleepy and portable and adored by all! Thanks for all the nice sentiment, hope you have a lovely summer too!

"I still greeted him at the front door when he got back with a cup of tea, bubblebAth and blowjob"

Maybe he thought you were seeing how much spunk was left in the tank incase you thought he'd been banging the tent lady.

:-) what can I say, I hadn't seen him in a week. I love him! (and he's damn sexy)

hope he reciprocated - seeing as you let him go to the festival and all. fair's fair!!