to hope my DD is a lesbian?

[foreverastudent]

I've just read yet another F*ing awful relationship thread on here. OMG!

If the relationships it seems that these Mumsnetter have, are typical of relationships then I hope my DD is a lesbian!

The though of her growing up and ending up with one of these w*s/b**s is seriously depressing me.

Were men always this bad? Will our sons be any different.

Examples of behaviour:
attempted murder
physical abuse
controlling behaviour
lying
cheating
not pulling weight re: chores and childcare
not sharing money evenly
not respecting partner
emotional abuse
blackmail
verbal abuse
rape
acting like a child
not taking responsibility for actions
running up secret debts
drink+drug abuse
addiction to porn
'using' lapdancing clubs

foreverastudent, you don't seem to like men very much.

All the the "crimes" you list can also be perpetrated by women.

yabu
although there is nothing wrong with being a lesbian, to wish your child was one just because you have some weird view on men is rather odd.
all men are not bad.

People don't come on saying 'My partners ok' , and feel smug saying their partners great, so the sample is completley skewed.

I know loads of abusive, violent, cheating lesbians. the bitches

AFAICT, one of the things women like to do is complain about men.

I tell my DP that the local womens group will not take her seriously if the worst thing she can moan about is that I leave the kitchen cabinet doors open while I am cooking

You asked "Were men always this bad". Sadly I suspect there were worse, or perhaps just a larger proportion of the male population, in times gone by... When wives and children had no vote, limited or no income/savings (except what the husband allowed), and where, entering marriage, a woman's property was passed into the husband's ownership.

Some men were perhaps even worse bs, namely the sons in rich families, who 'took advantage' of the maids, left them with children and out of a job, destined to look after a child with limited opportunities to regain employment, no rights, no legal redress (because they had no funds to pay for a lawyer), and even if they had some money to 'shut them up', the magistrate might well be the father of the same b who made her pregnant.

I would not wish my daughter was a lesbian for the reason you have given, OP.

But I do think that, despite the challenges thrown at lesbians by wider society, women with certain character types and interests are going to be accommodated and feel much more at home in the gay community than they are in straight society.

And for those reasons I hope that even if DD is not a lesbian, she gets the opportunity to live in an area where the gay community is flourishing so that she can get the benefits of that even if she is heterosexual.

PS We're not all that bad, you know

ummmmmmmmmmmm its all getting weird. you just get bad people somtimes! not just bad men or bad women! end of

i do think though some guys just dont get enough praise, and they should!!!

YABU. everyone is different. As others have said you get bad and good people of both sexes. you cant tell until you get to know someone what they're going to be like, but cant just presume everyone is nasty, otherwise you'd be a very lonely person.

So concentrate on teaching your daughter her own value, teaching her to be independant spirited so she doesn't "need to be part of a couple", ensuring she gets a good enough education that she can support herself to a decent standard.

Then when her time comes, she will be able to make her own choices from a position of strength.

Most men aren't arseholes. Most men. Quite frankly, all the man bashing on MN gets very tedious. As the mother of sons, I hope that my DS's don't end up with MIL's who are constantly waiting for them to put a foot wrong.

exactly, my brother is 22 and such a good chap, he treats his girlfriend so well, does everything for her, we never see him! she says jump he says how high, and yet when i go for a drink with her, all she does is slag him off and moan about this and that about him, piss's me right off!! hes a good boy and dosnt deserve the way she makes him out to be. shes lucky to have him!

From time to time someone will open up a "say something nice about your DH" thread - it's very telling that this has to be done before people will volunteer the info en masse, but moaning is done with little or no prompting.

(What is the female equivalent of "tosser" anyway? There isn't really one, apart from "bitch", and that's a bit too loaded in other ways...)

Good question UQD - beanflicker perhaps?

I use 'tosser' for both genders. I'm an equal opportunity insulterer.

lol!!!

Oh dear no man is perfect nor is all women either. Some of those on the list is an absoulte no no and there will be absoultly no compromise but others are a bit

My dh and I have an old fashioned set up which works for us, he goes to work, and i look after dd and do household chores. He can get a bit lazy with the chores though so can women. That is an extensive list and some are quite petty, in that case live on your own.

Dh can act like a child, then again i can too. Dh is lazy with the chores, I am too when having a lazy day.

of course YABU.

Not all men are bastards and not all relationships end in abuse.

In the same respect i have known Lesbain and gay couples who have also split due to DV/abuse and many of the items on your list.

sexuality offers no safety net

Well, the one and only incident of DV I've ever witnessed was between 2 women and the one poor girl got the crap beaten out of her.

Have not idea why I'm wasting my time on this rather nasty concept you have, but:

a) I'm glad you are 'forever a student', because you clearly have an awful lot to learn

b) See a)

Oh, and YABprofoundlyU

My D sis is a lesbian and I wouldn't wish it on my DD. Women can be just as bad as men, - manipulative, bitchy, moody.

Its up to us to make sure our sons are different! My DS (4) asked me how to get a girl in his nursery to be his girlfriend - I said to be nice to her.... he is learning early.