To send my 9 year old to bed at 8.30?

[Mowgli1970]

If she could manage on little sleep, get up on time and be as fresh as a daisy I wouldn't mind sending her later. But if she doesn't get 10 hours sleep, she's moody and tearful. She's moaning all her friends go to bed later than she does. She's not asleep at 8.30, I do allow her to read for 20 minutes or so. AIBU?

DS 3 1/2 has alredy started complaining that other children are playing at the park when he goes to bed (8pm) You know how much sleep your daughter needs so stick to your guns. FWIW I think your bedtime sounds good and is probably what I will do with ds & dd when the time comes.

My 9 year old at boarding school goes to bed at 7.40 with reading until lights out at 8, by which time it seems that most of them (without the option of claiming that everyone else goes to bed later) are exhausted. YADNBU.

When he's at home he gets spoiled: supper with us, bed at 9 and maybe a story after that.

Dd 7 is in bed at 8pm,stories until 8.30pm and then she reads for a while before going to sleep when she is ready usually around 9pm. At weekends it's much more relaxed and she generally goes to bed sometime before 10pm.

10 year old & 8 year old in room at 7:30 lights off 8-8:30. They do stay up later at the weekend. Dd1 is complaining about it being early but she is the one who can't get up in the morning.

My toddler DD and 6 year old DS go at 7.30pm, 9 year old DS at 8-8.30pm.

All three need woken in the mornings so they obviously need the sleep!

Let's face it, VERY few kids actually want to go to bed at their prescribed time. I remember being a right moany pants when I was a kid. But it's your job as a parent to enforce the rules that are good for them, and this is clearly one of them. Stick to being the good parent that you are - she will perform better in school, be happier and healthier. And thank you for it in the long-run.

Did you see that program a few weeks back where they did the experiment on kids (seem to think it was on kids around the age of 7-10) re sleep? Amazing. For the first week, they let the kids go to bed whenever they liked, but all still had to get up as usual for school etc. All of them chose to go to bed really late - after 10pm and some as late as their "maximum" time of midnight. Then the next week, they all had to go at the prescribed time (e.g. 8pm etc).

They measured the children's abilities in both weeks - intellectual, social and so on.

The first week, they all performed several years UNDER the average for their age. The second week, several years OVER - the difference was immediately measurable and significant.
More children also behaved badly, lied more and were ruder the first week. It's not rocket science.
Then of course there's the eating - we all eat more (and usually more "bad" stuff) when we're tired.

Stick to your guns. You're doing the right thing.

Agree with rewardgirl. My 9 yo DTs go to bed at 8 pm on weeknights, though they read for ages, play with the cat etc. Lights off by 9. Even so I think my DTD doesn't get enough sleep.. I need to wake her up for school more and more these days.

My 9 year old is in bed and with the light off 9and a story tape on if he likes any time between 8.30 and about 10.00 depending on how tired he is, what after school activities there are, what time dp gets home and whether Outnumbered is on the TV. But usually it's about 9.00.

Dd is 14 and her light is out sometime between 9.30 and 10.15 - also depending on what's going on. But she does have to be up at 6.30.

My 9 year old DDs go up about 8ish on a school night, and usually read for about 20 minutes. Weekends are 9ish if we are at home, can be anything up to midnight if we are out. They need their sleep in the week or I can't get them up for school.

My 10 yr old charge (I do 2 overnights with her per week) has to be in bed by 845pm - I normally let her read for 15mins or so if she wants to. She has to be up at 645am, so its just under 10hrs sleep. I think she would be better off with the 10hrs - as in lights out at 845pm but I virtually never get her in by then haha - she always chooses 830pm for remembering things she needs to do for the next morning but I now send her off to get into pjs, sort her bag and water bottle etc etc at 830pm and its beginning to sink in I think