to be crying my eyes out in front of my children

[TheFatOwlOfTheRemove]

I just found out today that I will have to look for a new job from September

This is the only job I have ever had which meant anything (everything, in fact) to me and I have worked my arse off, started as a volunteer sweeping floors etc and worked my way up to doing inclusion work 1-2-1 with children with SN

I have put far more into the job than is actually required and everyone has always said how well I do it and how dedicated I am

there were two of us doing the same job with different children and we had both been wondering what would happen when the children we work with move on to school

today I asked the other worker what her plans were and she smiled and said "Oh I'm OK, they've asked me to work with X" - X is the remaining child with needs for a 1-2-1 worker in the nusery after September

nobody was going to bother to tell me

I have done far more work with this child than she has, and I have put so much more into the job. I don't mean to be bitchy but it's just true - I have put more into it. I liaise with prtage and Ed Psych, I have attended meetings out of centre for transitions and assessments, I keep a detailed diary of the child's progress and language development etc, I take photos, I write up observations and give them to the child's key teacher

the other worker does NONE of these things

but her dh is the centre's handyman and they have all known each other for years

I feel heartbroken, hurt and frankly just can't stop crying

the children haven't noticed luckily, but if they do I won't be able to just say I'm fine, because I'm not

and dh is out all evening

Oh, and I found this out at lunch time so have had to put a brave face on all the way through the afternoon - being upbeat and positive towards my key teacher and boss etc even though I just feel so let down and undervalued by them

followed by a governor's meeting where we had to approve the SEN inclusion policy

I can't remember when I last felt so upset

don't make assumptions

there are processes that have to be gone through, notice to be given to you by school etc etc

also don't put more into a job than you are paid for, that's just making yourself a martyr

no, no notice or anything like that, I have been on casual monthly time sheets since I started there (three years now)

the other woprker had a temporary contract and they have just extended it for 7 months to cover this other child

I know the processes and protocols like the back of my hand, I've been there for years and I'm a governor as well

I am Greensleeves by the way

I don't see it as being a martyr, I see it as doing my very best for the child I work with using all the skills I have

but thanks

I thought all positions had to be advertised these days - it's not good policy to just give the post to someone. I'm wondering how this works with equal opportunities etc.

And you are not being unreasonable at all!

Could you not ask the head why you haven't been picked? These casual temp posts piss me off, why can't they just give permanent contracts?

Sorry you feel so bad

Am so so sorry to hear this.

Have no wise words for you, just want to say that your hurt and anguish leap off the page.

It seems dreadfully unfair - is there any chance at all that you will be kept on in any capacity?

Then start looking for another job where you can do what you love and feel valued for it. Go on to your LA website, and look at vacancies. I can see why you are upset, and I am sorry for you, but you will feel better and stronger if you take control of the situation now.

oh gosh a bummer because of the temp thing, much sympathy

I can't coco, I would just cry

really I just want someone to be kind to me

came home to post on MN about it and found a frosty message from Justine in my inbox, apparently I need to "cool it" when it comes to retaliating when posters make vile ignorant remarks about children with ASD (like my son)

really, today, I could just jump off a fucking bridge

honestly

I have clawed my way back up to a tolerable life by my fucking fingernails after a complete breakdown and a totally ruined life not so many years ago

I have made the mistake of being happy in what I have achieved and allowing myself to believe that I am not just destined to fail at everything

what a dickhead

Greensleeves, I am so sorry for the blow you got today. You have done so much for this child, I'd say he/she's much better off for all the hard work you put into his/her time at school. This child was very lucky.

I'm sure this has been recognised by your employer, and that you will be given a good reference. It's so sad your contract could not be extended.

haven't cried like this in years

when she told me it hurt, I have been walking around all afternoon feeling like I have toothache in my stomach

Even casual workers acquire employment rights the same as permanent workers once they have been employed by the same employer for more than a year. So you have the right not to be unfairly dismissed.

This looks like a redundancy situation, with two of you in the pool. If they have just decided to give this job to the other woman without going through a proper process you would be unfairly dismissed if they do get rid of you.

Have they said anything to you? You only have this woman's word for all this. Is it possible that they have other work lined up for you that you do not know about?

have you asked any of your bosses yet what is going to happen come september? it might be worth doing... maybe another child who needs your help might be starting then?

sorry you are upset and it does seem very unfair, especially that you've worked so hard

no there is nothing else

I asked my boss in a sort of "bear me in mind if any more inclusion work comes up" kind of way

she pulled a sad face and said "hmm, well, maybe"

Greeny I'm so sorry. It was a shit thing to do not even letting you know.

I work in a S School and we haven't had any positions advertised for ages they are bringing temps in so they don't have to pay holiday and sick pay.

Where I work if you've worked for a full school year you get a contract if you phone the board. Maybe you could look into it?

Greensleeves - If you have been there for three years doing the same job, I think you have legally earned the right to be treated in the same way as permanent staff, whatever contract you are on.

Why dont you copy this thread into legal/employment?

I don't want to take them on legally, I want them to WANT me there

I was starting to feel like part of the team, it's a feeling I have never had before and I just feel like I have been punched in the stomach

don't even want to go back in tomorrow tbh

I felt very similar recently and it was so hard to get through the day and the weeks that followed so I can understand why you are so gutted.

It really hurts when you have done your best, gone over and above what you needed to do and it's taken for granted and you are treated like you don't matter one bit.

You will move on and find something else but allow yourself some time to get over it first.

I'm still a bit sad about the situation I had but I have to get on with it because there is no other option and you will too because we are the type of people who keep giving and getting stronger every time we get shat upon from a great height.

Oh greeny, so sorry. How bloody hurtful, I completely get why you feel so bad.

I dont know what to say, Sometimes really crappy unfair stuff happens. There;s no answer to it, it's just utterly shit.

Wish I could pour you a big glass of wine and provide a box of tissues.

And btw your retaliations are the bloody best, Justine is very much mistaken. (plebby cuntbubble made me snort earlier!)

Chin up lovely x

Don't go in tomorrow, call in sick and take a day to try and recover.

I don't want to find something else

I just want to cancel the whole idea of having a normal life and just go back to hiding behind my closed curtains like I did for 4 years before

That is so so shit and they have handled it appallingly!

You sound like the kind of inclusion worker I would love love love to work with and would sing your praises to the highest rooftops if I worked with you.

I would feel just the same as you, and be so upset.

I would collate everything you have done, work examples, reports, lesson plans and take it all with you, ditto resources you can copy. If you have made things and used them in school, take them too.

I would then ask for a formal meeting with your Line Manager, and perhaps ask for an advocate from your LA to be there for you, and ask them for feedback on your post and any input as to why you were not the chosen one. Ask them what they feel you could do for your CPD.

It is shabby how this has unfolded.

Of course you feel like that.

The question you have to ask yourself is which gave you a greater experience.....

A. doing a job you loved and allowed you to help children

B. staying behind closed doors for years.

it's played into my stupid sensitivities

I feel hated, excluded, sneered at

and then I come to offload and find out that MNHQ think I'm an asshole as well

fuck it all