in thinking that an 8month old shouldn't have a suntan

[NarabugHitWindscreen]

I was out with some friends today at the park (making the most of the wonderful weather), some mums there I didn't know. We were sitting in the shade of a tree with the little ones exploring (most of the crawlers including my 1yr old DD were in and out of the sun, but she was smothered in factor 50 and had a ridiculously wide brimmed sun hat on).

There was one mum (friend of a friend) who had her 8month old DD (not a crawler) sitting out in the sun, wearing a short sleeveless dress and small hat. I was sitting near to the mum and decided to strike up a conversation, I'd recently been thrilled to find some more baby sun cream on offer and used this as an icebreaker. The mum says "oh I don't buy that, I use this on DD" (shows bottle of factor 8). I offer her some of mine and she declines, saying "I want her to get some colour on her, I dont want her looking pasty all summer". She then calls over to DD and says "you want a tan dont you so you can look pretty like mummy?". She then went on to complain that she couldn't find any fake tan for babies, and it took ages to get a tan in the sun.

The mum was a bit bronzed, but the daughter was fair skinned (not olive skinned or anything). I was a bit worried as I've been told that babies should be well covered in the sun. I asked the mum if she'd heard this (in a 'oh, I heard that.....' kinda way, not a bossy interfering way!). The mum says that its ok, as "babies can't catch skin cancer". Subject was changed.

I know its none of my business but I can't help but worry that the baby was going to burn to a crisp, it was brutally hot this morning. Later the baby had gone to sleep and the mum had laid her down on a blanket with her head in the shade and her body in the sun, and was saying "look! She's sunbathing!" to her friends.

WIBU? Or was I being a nosy cow? I'm socially rubbish for the record, but spent the morning fighting the urge to cover the poor mite up!

YANBU

That's horrific. Poor baby

The mum sounds pretty dense. I think I would have reiterated my point several times....

I have never, ever heard anything like that before.

I did try to mistress, but she seemed pretty set in, if you know what I mean. She thought what she thought and wasn't budging

aack .
I am pretty lax and prefer DC to catch some colour not because it looks good, but because (all the research I have done strongly suggests that) it better protects them from skin cancer to have mild-moderate sun exposure but sheesh, that's awful, OP, YANBU.

Yanbu in that it is a bit pathetic to want the children to have a suntan.

But, my 2 eldest have skin that turns brown at the drop of a hat, lotion or not - it's very olive skin, and I'm sure people are critical of me (also because they have ash blond hair, it is more noticeable).

Sounds like you did your best, you can't force people even if they are complete boneheads misguided

oh god - I was about to come and offer a possible explanation for tanned baby - as I have mixed race boys who despite covering in high factor sun cream have always become darker in the sun as more of their pigments have come out.......

But what you describe is !

I didn't know that shine, and I agree that covering up is better for protection than slathering in cream and letting them be exposed. I do both, slather then cover...... then keep out of the sun as much as anyway......

yes but shineon - not all children (or adults) are that lucky. Some burn very quickly without a high factor sun cream on

shineon - my mum used to try the same on me..........but any exposed bits used to burn (and I never left the UK until I was 18)

Interesting in my much laxer late teens I hardly ever wore suncream in Zim and only burnt once in 2 1/2yrs out there - on a cool, cloudy day and it was drizzling the whole time - I went kayaking, woke up the next morning to find my whole face blistered and peeling >>

another
YANBU - babies should be kept out of the sun as much as possible. Poor child - the Mum sounds impossibly stupid.

My daughter is mixed race, but was quite fair as a baby. When she was very young she got a 'tan'. I never used sunblock on her at that age, but also she never went into the sun. She got colour just from the brief moments of going from house to car etc - not really a tan, but just a tiny bit of sun exposure bringing out her natural colour. I had endless people (not knowing that her Dad is black) comment "Oh your baby has a tan - how cute" - and could never tell if they were joking, horrified at the thought I might be tanning the baby & feeling that they must comment, or actually thinking she looked cute with a tan and I would tan the baby!

BTW re factor 50+ suncream there was an earlier thread on this. In Australia is illegal to label suncream as being higher than factor 30+. This is because it is impossible for any cream to stay on your skin long enough to provide 50+ protection (it is sweated or rubbed off for example) and labelling it 50+ actually gives the consumer false information as they are thinking it will protect them more than say an SPF 30 product. I believe the EU are going to change the law here in a similar way. 50+ products are often more expensive but offer no more protection than 30+ or possibly even 20+. The most important thing is to reapply them especially on kids who tend to be very active. I find the natural ones with zinc in them work really well - use them when we go to NZ where the sun is fierce!.

I put sun cream on the DC if they are going to be in the sun for a longer period of time. Other than that they use hats/loose clothes. Some of my friends put factor 50 on their DC at the slightest hint of sunshine. DD often reacts to suncream so I avoid it unless it is absolutely necessary.

Btw, SPF of 25 to 30 is sufficient, it blocks 98% of the sun's rays so using SPF 50 is not necessary.

Last summer I took my twins on a day out to see an airshow, they were just over a year old and in the buggy, both had hats on etc but no sun cream as it was overcast, the next day I was in a&e with my little boys who had huge blisters on his cheeks because of the sunburn. I was so upset and mortified that I had been so bloody stupid.

My advice put suncream on them, I would rather put some chemicals on them than they suffer what my DS suffered last year.

Wanting a baby with a suntan sounds really silly.

However, it never occurred to me to apply sun lotion to my children when we were in the UK, unless we were at the beach on a (very) rare sunny day.

yes but how are you going to know (until youre child has burnt) whether they're going to be more sensitive or not?

TO be fair I only put cream on the dcs when it is blazing hot as they both have quite sensitive skin.... however they are both paper white and burn very easily.

They love spending time out doors so im just going to get a garden gazebo so the can have the best of both worlds wehn they are in the garden.

My niece is mixed race.... you only need to mention the word sun and she has a tan. Am very jealous! She has the most fabulously soft olive skin ever and thick dark eye lashes! she could go out in a bin bag and still look amazing. Lucky thing!

Was going to say exactly what MmeLindt says and also agree with shineon.
It is absolutely trre that factor 25/30 is more than adequate and often people get a false sense of security from higher factors. They offer no more protection than factor 30.

I have also read research that it is better for children to be covered and get a little sun exposure than to be slathered in sun cream, there has been research to suggest that children these days are not getting enough sun exposure due to too much sun block and the constant panic of skin cancer.

Also babies under 1 should be shaded as much as possible anyway and suncream not generally recommended for them if you read a lot of the bottles.

This mother however does sound bonkers purposly trying to give her baby a tan but I do agree you can go too far the other way as well.

Do you think she was winding you up cos you were being nosey and doing that sideways questioning not really getting to the point thing?

I always used suncream on mine when little but ds at 10 months got burnt at the beach despite using factor 25 [highest you could get] a hat and a parasol eldest always tans as she has an olive skin but she still uses suncream and youngest can't really go out in the hot sun without being totally covered up as she developed a sun allergy 2 years ago at the age of 12.last may she looked like she'd been in a boxing ring it was that bad.