in thinking that an 8month old shouldn't have a suntan

[NarabugHitWindscreen]

I was out with some friends today at the park (making the most of the wonderful weather), some mums there I didn't know. We were sitting in the shade of a tree with the little ones exploring (most of the crawlers including my 1yr old DD were in and out of the sun, but she was smothered in factor 50 and had a ridiculously wide brimmed sun hat on).

There was one mum (friend of a friend) who had her 8month old DD (not a crawler) sitting out in the sun, wearing a short sleeveless dress and small hat. I was sitting near to the mum and decided to strike up a conversation, I'd recently been thrilled to find some more baby sun cream on offer and used this as an icebreaker. The mum says "oh I don't buy that, I use this on DD" (shows bottle of factor 8). I offer her some of mine and she declines, saying "I want her to get some colour on her, I dont want her looking pasty all summer". She then calls over to DD and says "you want a tan dont you so you can look pretty like mummy?". She then went on to complain that she couldn't find any fake tan for babies, and it took ages to get a tan in the sun.

The mum was a bit bronzed, but the daughter was fair skinned (not olive skinned or anything). I was a bit worried as I've been told that babies should be well covered in the sun. I asked the mum if she'd heard this (in a 'oh, I heard that.....' kinda way, not a bossy interfering way!). The mum says that its ok, as "babies can't catch skin cancer". Subject was changed.

I know its none of my business but I can't help but worry that the baby was going to burn to a crisp, it was brutally hot this morning. Later the baby had gone to sleep and the mum had laid her down on a blanket with her head in the shade and her body in the sun, and was saying "look! She's sunbathing!" to her friends.

WIBU? Or was I being a nosy cow? I'm socially rubbish for the record, but spent the morning fighting the urge to cover the poor mite up!

One of my friends (and i use that term loosely) pointed her two year old towards the uk sun whilst asleep in her pushchair, to get some colour. By the night she was in hospital with sun stroke and still has scars on her face from the sun burn, poor baby.

we only use suncream on the DC abroad

some degree of colour actually protects them from burning later on in summer when it gets really really hot

out of the sun between 12-2, cotton t-shirt if they are spending ages in the pool or the sea (where most people tend to burn) and a stripe of zinc over their cheeks/nost/shoulders if the sun is really beating down

no sunburn ever

I lived in Tenerife and DS was born there. Always used an unbrella, stayed in during hottest part of the day and he wore an all-in-one swimshort suity thing. Hat with visor and neck cover. The rest of his skin was covered in suncream. I use factor 30 now (UK) and he never seems to change colour but I wouldn't use less just in case.

I do not have the attitude NO SUN OMG you can't tan a baby/child etc BUT I wouldn't deliberatly encourage a tan for my child. If he's in the sun very well etc.

Think 8 months is a bit young to be perpously putting your child in the sun. YANBU

No, you weren't being a nosy cow but sadly it can be difficult to educate some people to the dangers of burns in children, it't the same with other burns, from black coffee, trailing kettle leads, fireworks etc. It's young children like these that can sadly end up in A & E / being admitted to hospital with burns / dehydration.

Don't be too quick to leap to conclusions. My children's Dad is mixed race. They are I suppose also mixed race but you wouldn't think so if you saw them. You might just think that they 'shouldn't have tans'. lol I have been asked if my son "went to Spain without you"

BOLD the OP isn't questioning a child with a tan but a mother using only factor 8 on an 8 months old and sitting her in the sun to get a tan as she can't find any baby tanning lotion!!!!

BTW I'm jelous of your children as I went to spain and got a few extra days thanks to volcanic ash an you'd never of know the colour I came back!!

yes, mumbar, I saw that after I'd posted. I must admit I leapt to conclusions because I have blue eyed children who have a black grandparent, so people don't think that they are anything other than "tanned". dykwim? Sorry OP.

I am sensitive perhaps!!

This whole nonsense about never letting a child see the sun and slathering it in Factor 1000 cream is patently ridiculous.

Silly over protective, paranoid yummy mummies who voraciously read every new baby manual that's published, irrespective of whether it's written by some moron like Jools Oliver, and then go an put humungous hats and all in one swim suits on little children and keep them out of the sun entirely. It's pathetic and all down to scaremongering and a moral panic which is created by the sun cream industry who feed off this panic by charging over vastly inflated prices for creams so that they can pay their shareholders handsome dividends!

A certain amount of sun exposure is good for a human being and also vital to health. There's no harm whatsoever in monitoring a child's exposure to sun and using a decent cream to enable them to enjoy the sun. As long as you are mindful of there risks and act accordingly there is no harm - being mindful of the risks needn't mean acting like some of the women I'm reading about here do.

What about that story the other day of that woman who slathered on Factor 50+ all her life and stayed out of teh sun and then ended up with rickets due to lack of vitamin D?

Actually, I think the OP is one of the yummy mummies I'm talking about who more than likely took grave exception to seeing a baby in the sun. I expect the mother of the baby, who is now being cyber character assassinated, made the comment about baby self tan in jest but I find these earnest yummy mummy types seldom have a sense of humour so it comes as no surprise she took it literally.

hi your message has upset me genevievehawkings.

background - I was born in the seventies can remember being regularly sunburned - sun safety not promoted as much as it is now

fast forward to two years ago - diagnosis of malignant melanoma - and left literally scarred as the melanoma was on my face

So I think your comments are rude and misguided as well as potentially very damaging

You should be ashamed.

some-one seems to be having an attack of the grumps GH

I don't really see why you should be getting quite so het up about this, and also quite why you would attack the OP personally. An unnecessarily vociferous reaction I would say.

I'd go for the sun cream any day of the week. LO is covered and will continue to be.

I noticed tan lines back in March so think LO has had enough protection free sun.I was advised by the consultant who removed my little skin cancer to cover him up. So I do and I cover myself up as well - and I was never a sunworshipper btw and I'm mixed with olive skin.

Never be complacent.

I keep my DC covered and creamed whenever they are outside on sunny day.. more for me though.. DH turkish.. spf 30 and even 10 minutes of sun for them and they are browner than i would ever turn in a lifetime.. I want them to look like my DC too

On a more serious note.. it would take alot for them to burn but it is the hidden damage i am always careful about.

If this friend is so concerned about her childs appearence then sun damage is not the way to go about it.. she will look as old as her mother in 20 years time.

Long sleeves, trousers etc is the way to go.

Yeah great for park garden etc and when children are very young. My DS 5 gets too hot. I went to the beach today with a friend and our 3 DC's. They all had hats, swimwear and factor 30 on. We stayed about 3 hours, had lunch etc and paddled. We DID take a tent - just a cheapy play one not a sunscreen one for if the children wanted shade.

They are not burnt, have got a tan tho and had a great time

My DS gets a heat/nettle rash if he gets too hot and from some sun screens so yes I would pay more for one that doesn't do this. (however the cheapy supermarket one doesn't but expensive brand one does)

I have had a non malignant cancerous mole on my cheek so would not take the risk or burning or overexsposure.

IMO it's all about the balance - the sun isn't something to be avoided but you need to be sensible in it.

(says the woman sporting a great burnt chest )

I told DP about this thread and he told me he got sunburnt when he was 15 at an outdoor pool place. Never put any lotion on, and had a big blister on his shoulders/back, which now look like freckles, 20 years on.

DP, Tom and Erin had it on today. I didn't as we just went food shopping, but DP took Tom to park and I wasn't risking 5 month old Erin getting burnt.

YANBU in this instance - aside from the dubiousness of wanting a small baby to get a tan so she looks 'pretty', it's dangerous for small babies to get overheated, as well as burnt.

But I do get a bit tired of the sun lotion police - I don't think DS (2) has ever had a sun burn, but he has naturally olive skin (a mix of my Portuguese heritage and his dad's even darker olive skin) and tans very quickly. Yes, I do cream him up, but not obsessively, and I do also worry about the chemicals. People with more mediterranean skin have better natural defences against the sun, so it can't be one rule for everyone.

I do make sure he wears a hat though - I'm mostly worried about him getting overheated.

GH - it's thinking like your that has led to Australia having appalling skin melanoma rates. Stupidly ignorant.

And Reshapewhiledamp - that may be the case with your DC but for most people in the UK it isn't and it's better that people play safe. And you can still get burned when you're olive skinned

shineon Don't your DCs get hot wearing long sleeves in the blazing sun though? And what about their legs do you keep those covered too?

People in really hot countries regularly wear all covering very fine cotton clothing. It isn't any hotter than thick fabric shorts and tshirts

Well yesterday I wore linen shorts and cotton vest top. Today I wore linen trousers and linen kaftan thing and was much more uncomfortable.

Total, complete and utter overreation to my post - people reading only what they want to read and totally ignoring that I said people should be responsible and monitor exposure /use cream etc but why would I expect anything less here...?

Probably because 90% of your post was ridiculing people who take sun damage seriously genevieve?

mumbar my ds has the same thing... looks like he's been slapped iyswim.. the only one that works for him is avons childrens suncream, i usually buy loads around now when its on special offer