to think there should be a telephone curfew in hospitals?

[LadyBiscuit]

Why do hospitals allow patients to talk on the phone all day and all night? It drives me bonkers. There was a woman in the opposite bed when I had DS who talked virtually all night long which drove me slightly insane but at least she was talking quietly and of course there were wailing babes. But yesterday I went to see my sister who is in hospital and the woman next to her was on the phone the entire time I was there (nearly an hour) talking really loudly on her mobile the entire time. At 11.30pm she was still at it. So my sister asked her if she would desist given that, you know, they are all (presumably) seriously ill and that. The woman gave her a mouthful of abuse and carried on chatting away.

Eventually my sister went and asked a nurse if she could have a word and the nurse told her that there was nothing she could do. WTF?? AIBU or should phone conversations in hospitals have an 11pm curfew so that everyone can get some sleep (the person on the phone as well as the rest of the ward)?

I think they should be banned on wards tbh.

Some people are ill enough to need to rest/sleep most of the day!

it is unreasonable to insist on a curfew, however if someone woke me by talking loudly on the phone in the early hours of the morning i would have felt totally reasonable in giving them a mouthful of my own.

LB your sister's condition (which goes without saying I'm really sorry about) isn't really relevant. People are in hospital for all sorts of reasons and need to talk to people for all sorts of reasons. Your sister who is very ill may need sleep, the person in the bed next to her also very ill may need comfort and to speak to a loved one. The behaviour of a few ignorant twats shouldn't mean everyone else suffers.

A word from staff or signs up should be sufficient. The knee jerk reaction is always to ban things and treat everyone like children.

You're right, Rockbird, but the trouble is that a section of the adult population are essentially oversized children. They don't have any capacity to empathise and they don't do deferred gratification. Anything they want they have immediately.

As previously said, people used to manage.

What should take priority-someones need to rest or someone´s need to talk?

There should be a curfew for non-essential calls, yes. I had to phone DP at 1am and tell him to get back to hospital as my waters had broken and was about to give birth (he'd been sent home at midnight) and I probably wasn't whispering at the time but I think that's quite justified. People having loud pointless chats is another thing altogether, obviously.

Hope you are OK muggglewump!

I do agree that that there should be a phone/visitor ban in place after say 10pm unless in special circumstances. Mobiles have only been in general use relatively recently - how on earth did people manage before.

I have spent weeks in the children's ward, on and off. It is SO hard to sleep in hospitals, with monitors beeping, the lights on, nurses talking, patients needing attention, and then in the middle of it all, someone has a dvd on all bloody night at a high volume. Or people who visit a sick chold and then turn the ward TV to the footie and sit glued to it at full volume.

I would never mind a frightened ill patient receiving or making calls - it's the visitors and the not-very-ill-bored people who make most noise anyway.

Some people are simply selfish and inconsiderate. When we've been in for longer than a night or two, I ask the nurses to turn off the lights, ask peple to be quiet, and turn off he DVDs of those who have fallen asleep and left Dora the explorer on a loop.

thank goodness dh had his own room the 16months he was in hospital, so his late-night scared-shitless calls to me didnt disturb anyone. especially when he had his 3rd stroke and couldnt remember anythng from minutes ago and was calling me constantly.

Actually I disagree people in hospitals need constant access to phones. My poor old dad spent many weeks on wards in the last stages of his life and was driven mad by the incessant bleeps rings and chatting that went on around him. For every person who "needs" to call someone, there's probably a patient nearby gritting their teeth and waiting for some peace and quiet. Mobile phones have their place but I don't think they should be available 24/7 on wards. Also, nurses are trained to offer comfort in people in distress and there are visiting times.
Like I said, 10.30pm - 7 am curfew. perfectly reasonable.

I have said he before on here and i'll no doubt say it again.

Some people are just arseholes.

Some people are such huge arseholes they will put their need for innane chat above your need for sleep even if you have just had a baby or major surgery.

The best we can hope if that David Cameron eradicates them

I used my phone when i was in hospital, on silent. I'd never have dreamed of talking on it in the middle of the night, I even had it on silent in the day time. Good manners innit.

i know pixie. mind you, his LVAD was louder than his phone

Tidey - in my day [old gimmer emoticon] one of the ward staff would have used the phone in the office to ring your dh and tell him to get back to the hospital.

And Misdee - in said olden days, there would have been more staff on the ward, and more support/reassurance for your dh.

I couldn't sleep, I wish. Tamazepam that I begged for got me an hour, and nights were the worst, I was so anxious and I knew my BF would have talked me through it. I couldn't get out of bed to go elsewhere and yes, perhaps I was being selfish but my metal health was in tatters and hasn't really recovered. n(I've been home 8 days now)

I do think a universal speak on the phone at anytime, anywhere is unreasonable but it should be allowed on an individual basis.

Fwiw, in intensive care, when I wasn't ventilated and could just talk, it was all private rooms so no possibility of disturbing other patients, and the only noise came from the radio the nurse insisted on having on.

The nurses weren't quiet on the High Dependency Unit either so I really don't see how a quiet phone call would have been worse than them, but as I say, not possible in the hospital I was in, hence discharging myself.

I thought mobile phones were banned in hospitals bacuse of the risk to medical equipment!
When did that change?

misdee, 16 months I don't think anyone would begrudge an ill person a genuine phonecall.

Like a couple of other posters have said, it's the inane he said/she said/'I must get some chips when I go to the shop tomorrow' conversations that people object to.

It's bad enough having to listen in to inane phone calls on the train.

YANBU. When I was in having DS, I was induced and was on the ward for most of a day waiting for things to get going. There was a girl opposite me who was in being monitored and there was a steady procession of friends in and out with their own toddlers who were running about, and then all the 'he said he shagged so-and-so' 'oh the fucker I would chop his knob off' type conversations. When there was no-one actually there with her, she was on her mobile carrying on in the same vein. Hideous.

We paid for me to have a private room after DS was born so I had 3 days of peace and quiet to recover from my section before we were allowed home.

Rockbird - no one needs to talk to their friends and family all day and all night. They may want to but that's different. How the hell did we all manage before mobiles? And phones by the bed FGS? We simply did. And it's frankly a bit ironic for you to say that my sister's illness is irrelevant when that was the whole point of your post!

Greenshadow - the only equipment mobiles interfere with afaik is heart monitors (although when I was hooked up to one when I was pg, it didn't seem affected by the two teenagers sitting opposite me who were on the phone the entire 3 hours). Although I wish they'd carry on pretending they did.

YADNBU!!!

I had an op and was trying to go back to sleep after being woken up from my general. The woman next to me was watching her tv without the headphones which was really irritating.

When I had DS, the woman next to me had her tv flickering all night, even though both sets of curtains were shut I could see it, even when I closed my eyes, then she was on the phone to her DH at 4-5am!!! That was the worse night of my life and I got no sleep. Luckily because I have M.E. and cannot cope with noise etc, I got my own room the next night.

I think these things need to be banned. Its all very well using it in the day but if you are really ill and need to sleep, its far too much to have people around you on the phone all the time.

YANNNNBU. I spent three nights in hospital with PFB, four other women on the ward all constantly on their phones. One even went through all her ring tones at midnight (between calls) and another had a Skype video conference call very, very loudly with her entire family at 22:00.

I had my phone on silent and didn't take or make calls at all. But then I don't make calls on busy trains either.

I can see both sides. Having spent two years in hosptial with DD I recognise the need to use a mobile. The hospital phones are very very expensive to call into and I understand there were moves to make outgoing calls premium rate as well.

If you spend a lot of time in hospital with a sick child you still have to carry on with everyday stuff and you need a phone for that. I had to phone schools, make appts, talk to my other kids, cry down the phone in utter despair, have a laugh with my friends, reassure my family etc.

I did all this as descreetly and quietly as I could. If possible I would go to the kitchen and even hid in the toilets. But sometimes I couldnt leave the ward so had to use my phone there. I wouldnt make a racket late at night but even my whispered chats could have annoyed someone.

I have also had to listen as people excitedly screeched down their mobiles about their minor injuries drunken fuckups as I tried to hold it together and comfort my DD in A&E whilst we waited to be admitted. I have also put up with other parents on the general ward talking total crap for hours on end.

It must be very hard for adult patients with no one to look after them/speak on their behalf.

I ended up discharging myself home early after DD was born as the noise on the ward was ridiculous. The nurses were talking at full volume all night at the nurses station (my bay was next to it as we were the ones who needed more care) and the woman opposite me was on her mobile constantly until 2am ignoring her screaming newborn while chatting away. If it wasn't for the fact I could barely walk I would have gone over and taken her phone off her...

I appreciate that some calls can't wait until morning (I had a text conversation with DH that night telling him that we were coming home whatever!) but nurses coming round and turning down lights and asking for noise to kept to a minimum (and doing so themselves) is not unreasonable. So no YANBU.