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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

little boys weeing in the park ...

41 replies

pamelat · 10/05/2010 17:03

Am not annoyed by this, more 'amused' in a kind of 'is that normal' way.

DD is 2. We were on the park with her yesterday.

Park was quiet. 3 little boys, aged about 6-8ish with a woman.

One little boy, about 6 says to her, "need to wee" she says that he doesnt. She turns her back and reads her newspaper.

The toilets are 100m away and quite nice ones

Boy proceeds to wee on the park on the grass.

Older boy laughs, about 8, and also wees on the grass

The woman ignores them!!! Now I know they are kids and I know I dont hve a 6 year old but surely she should have 1)taken them to toilet and 2) they could have gone themselves?!

DD was quite surprised ......

OP posts:

2shoes · 10/05/2010 17:06

i think she should have taken them to the toilets
imo that is a little bit to old to be just going in the middle of somewhere(even in a bush would have been better)

SloanyPony · 10/05/2010 17:07

If there were toilets then they should have gone there. The mother ignoring them might well be something to do with them doing it for attention not because they need to, and it might be her way of trying to nip it in the bud.

Original poster

pamelat · 10/05/2010 17:09

the first boy, the younger one, I felt quite sorry for him. To be fair, he had said!! After that it was just a free for all, very odd.

I guess you never know how bad a morning someone had had.

Its just its a nice little park with a cafe attached, so there we were having our cup of tea and cake .... mmmmmmm.

Am due with a boy in 2 days and was worried this was just "boy" behaviour?!!

OP posts:

paulaplumpbottom · 10/05/2010 17:11

She should have taken them. Surely at home is when to stand your ground

PrettyCandles · 10/05/2010 17:11

I think you're being excessively and over-generously non-judgemental, SloaneyPony. This seems to me utterly wrong behaviour from the mum. Of course there may be valid reasons why she behaved this way depression for eg.

mememe30 · 10/05/2010 17:12

No it is not boy behaviour. If there are toilets I would expect my 6 year old to use them if not then he would have to go behind a tree not all over the grass in front of everyone.

cyb · 10/05/2010 17:13

I dont mind my boys weeing behind a tree in the park if there are no loos nearby, after all dogs do it all the time. Boys do love to pee al fresco though

PrettyCandles · 10/05/2010 17:14

Pamelat - yes boys enjoy peeing freely . But they can also learn apprpriate behaviour.

ChasingSquirrels · 10/05/2010 17:17

both my ds's would MUCH prefer to pee up a tree than in a toilet.

and with some loo's...

But if they are nice loos, and he asked, and the loos were just there - then yes they should have used the toilet.

QSBooooo · 10/05/2010 17:18

You can wee freely when mountain trekking or walking in the woods, not when you are in the park.

Even at 6, I would expect my son to be able to walk over to the toilets himself and find his way back again, if it was in sight.

SaliMali1 · 10/05/2010 17:19

I have one for you the playgroup leader where I work let a little boy pee all up the wall! The loos are round the corner in the school building now to me that is unreasonable.

waitingforbedtime · 10/05/2010 17:22

My sister would let her 4 year old do this, he has been known to pee anywhere. I have never let me ds do it, not even when 1st toilet training (within reason obviously!) - if there's a toilet we use that, if there isnt we go to a secluded spot! Ds is 3 and often says when he sees people doing this 'youre nto allowed to pee outside!'

Morloth · 10/05/2010 17:23

Exactly what mememe30 said.

NoahAndTheWhale · 10/05/2010 17:25

I have a 6 year old DS and if the park we go to most often had toilets, he would use them. Sometimes we have been there and he has needed to wee then we find a bush and he does it discretely.

No way would I let him wee just on the grass - if that happened we would leave the park immediately.

SloanyPony · 10/05/2010 17:59

"I think you're being excessively and over-generously non-judgemental, SloaneyPony"

Can I have a badge, please?

sheard · 10/05/2010 18:03

ha!! i used to have a long bus ride home with my young son and i had to make sure he had a pee before he got on abus but if there where no toilets id at least take ;him out of sight!!;)

fruitful · 10/05/2010 18:07

I'm toilet-training ds2 (2.4) and I take him behind a bush or away from people a bit.

Ds1 (5) was a bit miffed when I let ds2 pee in some weeds the other day, but said that he had to hang on till we got home!

mumbar · 10/05/2010 18:12

I agree with other mn ers with no toilets both boys and girls may have to go behind a bush but IMO not if there is toilets.

belly36 · 10/05/2010 18:40

My mum let DS pee in her garden one day. Now he always wants to pee in the bloody garden!

getthewineinthefridge · 10/05/2010 18:45

my MIL taught DS to do al fresco wees and for quite some time he would just drop his keks and wee before I could stop him.

He now knows (nearly 6) that if there is no alternative, behind a tree/sand dune etc is probably fine, but he knows not to just whip it out any old place especially on an area people are going to sit on/play on!!!!

But if there is a loo, and time to get there, then one should at least try....

MrsGravy · 10/05/2010 18:46

Well I wouldn't let 3yo DS do this - not with toilets just there!

I remember when DD was in nursery class the teachers had problems with little boys weeing in the school yard - apparently they were allowed to just wee in the garden/park indiscriminately and, understandably, didn't understand the difference once they were at school!!

sallyJayGorce · 10/05/2010 18:48

Depends on the state of the toilets. When we were in London our nearest park had no toilets and the next nearest had toilets scattered with used needles. I went for the by the hedge option.

acebaby · 10/05/2010 19:19

DS1 (4.10) says he prefers the toilets, but unfortunately his willy prefers the trees . I'm afraid his willy tends to win most of the time, but if there were toilets 100m away, I think DS1 (and I) would probably prevail

pigletmania · 10/05/2010 20:37

This is a bit old to be just going anywhere, they are hardly toddlers toilet training are they. If they are desperate they should be able to hold on a little till they find somewhere discreet.

wonderingwondering · 10/05/2010 20:41

There's no way I'd let my 6 yr old (or tbh, an 8 year old) use male public toilets, in a park, unaccompanied. And if I had three kids, that were too young to be left unsupervised in a park, not sure I'd drag them all over to the ladies. Esp as some children wee constantly, so with 3 I could quite possibly spend all afternoon trolling backwards and forwards to the loo.

But I would make them go to a bush out of the way. Not on the grass.

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