to think a person should be able to eat in a fancy-pants restaurant with a small child..

[Stannie]

without stage whispered comments and scathing looks ?

I went to a yummy and quite smart Thai restaurant with my Mum and 7mo son on Bank Holiday Monday. We planned a late lunch so we would miss the rush and arrived at 3pm when it was less busy.

The restaurant is child friendly - with buggy parking if required, lovely highchairs provided and a dedicated changing/feeding room (with lovely Burts Bees products for use)

We were seated in an area with 5 tables - a good distance from each other. PFB was happy in his highchair and quietly busy with a rusk and a toy. We ate, he sampled our food (loves duck!) and at no time did he cry/shout/make any real noise bar a bit of cooing.

Another family group with a small girl (10-12mnths ?) were seated near us. Their little girl was equally sociable, making little disturbance etc.

Throughout the meal we were able to hear diners at other tables making comments about children under 10 being out in "upmarket eateries" (poncy or what!) and that "children prevent other diners from really enjoying themselves" (what do they want to do ???)

AIBU taking my baby there ? Would I have been unreasonable to have said something to the complainers ?

YABU to have let them upset you!!

If the restaurant provide all that for children, then clearly they are happy for them to be there - other diners can choose to eat somewhere less child-friendly and that is exactly what I would have been telling them!! (Well, telling my Mum, quite loudly )

Just having re-read your other posts, Stannie - it crossed my mind that there have been posts on here by people who don't like seeing small DC out in the evening because they've come out to get away from the DC and don't then want other peoples' DC "inflicted" on them - but that should hardly apply to "mummies wot lunch", which is who your white-jeaned-cashmere-sweatered cowbags sound like.

I don't think it should apply to anyone, thumbwitch. I despise this (very british) idea that children don't belong in restaurants. or pubs, for that matter.

Mind you, I have been known to tell other people's children off for misbehaving in restaurants!

... and parents for giving their DCs a whole seat each on crowded trains ...

If the restaurant welcomes kids then its tough tbh, people dont like it there are plenty of 'upmarket' establishments that dont.

You may have misunderstood me there GraceAgain - I don't think it should "apply" to anyone either. I have just seen other posters on here complaining about children being out in the evening.

As long as the kid doesn't become my problem, who cares? I don't find the sight of children that distressing.

DS1 has eaten in some pretty flash places and he has rarely been the only baby/child there.

yanbu.

I once ended up shouting talking loudly to one man once and pointing at that we were at an all you can eat buffet at 6.15 inside a CINEMA complex, not the Ivy at 8pm

Ignore them. They were twats.

Of course a well-behaved child should be welcome. I don't even mind noisy children TBH - now I am a parent I just think thank god it's not my problem But for the majority of the population I can see why a noisy whingey child would spoil the atmosphere.

Hmmm quite agree SGM. A loud drunken idiot is much more offensive and bothersome than and loud happy child. I know which I'd rather share space with.

It really is a damn shame isn't it? We took our 10 week old to a restaurant at Fortnum and Mason a few weeks before Christmas a couple of years ago. She was as quite as a church mouse. We ate our meals in peace and she was simply heavenly throughout The people at the next table complained to the manager that our child was at the table (at, not on, not having her nappy changed, not screaming, crying etc). The manager, naturally, did nothing as the chap who complained was clearly a fool. In fact, we had another diner come up to us and say what a delightful child we have and how lovely it was to see such a lovely young baby (proud mother emoticon).

Some people forget that they were children and would like for them to be completely out of sight and mind.

Raymond Blanc seems to choose staff who love children (I think he must like them himself), so his restaurants are always positively welcoming. My kids even liked his version of chicken nuggets and chips with ketchup (some places try to do this healthily but it doesn't taste as nice as the rubbish version, his was lovely).

When DS was about 12 weeks old we had a stop over in Iceland, and ate at a posh restaurant. DS was a pain, so DH and I took it in turns to eat, or be in the separate bar settling DS. Apart from us most people in the restaurant were Icelandic business people. There were a few other British tourists. Guess who were the only people to scowl rather than smile at DS?

yanbu, especially as you went at 3pm! the sods

YANBU I would have totally ignored them and their rude behaviour, they are the ones without any manners or social skills. Across the continent this is totally different, children are welcomed with open arms, and the culture is very child orientated, and guess what the childrens social skills are better too.

YABU
I do think its wrong actually. Not every place HAS to cater for children. Not everyone has children or wants to be around children. Why do children HAVE to be allowed everywhere.
The whole world demands that children be allowed everywhere. But actually I don't agree with that.
I take my sons to lots of places. But I also went for a posh birthday treat , with my mum to a 2 star michelin star place. And I thought it was right that no children were there. Actually, they may well normally welcome children, and there just happened to be none there that day, but I don't feel that everyhwhere should be made to cater for children.
Bet I'll get flounced for this.

but Oblomov - OP isn't saying she think s every restaurant should provide for children she was asking if she was BU to take her childrne to this restaurant...given her description "The restaurant is child friendly - with buggy parking if required, lovely highchairs provided and a dedicated changing/feeding room (with lovely Burts Bees products for use)", it doesn't seem unreasonable to me.

FWIW I agree that not every restaurant needs to be child friendly.

I think you were very unlucky
I have taken DD to loads of very posh places and I have never had odd looks or complaints.

I did ask to be seated away from some children when attending somewhere pretty posh once because it was evening, it was an anniverasry supper and i find small children hugelt distracting. These ones were also shouting and throwing thigs around - not badly behaved but just being toddlers and I didn't want to be sitting with someone elses toddlers on my anniversary.

I am not sure though if you would want to go back to that resteraunt. With women applying lipgloss at the table and denim clad people droning on about school fees and all of them tutting about well behaved babies during a luncheon service - it all sounds totally bizarre.

8pm on a Saturday evening at an upmarket restaurant favoured by cooing romantic couples and I would have agreed with the other diners - but 3pm on a bank holiday Monday is prime family time and I would expect to see families out together at all types of eatery. YANBU.

Point taken Kew. I wasn't actually adressing Op, re 'this' particular restaurant. I was more generally speaking.

YANBU....those people in that Thia place were totally stodgy, stuffy and obviously have no idea what its like to have children. Ignore their comments, and get out as much as you can. Children and babies should be most welcome in restaurants. How dare they make such rude comments. !!
I would have glowered angrily at them !!

What utterly silly comments by your fellow diners! Why, how on Earth would one expect ones precious offspring to grow up a discerning diner with knowledge of fine foods and better restaurants if one didn't introduce the said precious offspring to the finer eating establishments early on. Not all parentials drag their children to MaccieDo-s you know.
Being deadly serious. The only explanation would be that the 'whingey' customers were not used to the decent restaurants themselves and the particular occasion was the 'big day out' for them. Pity....

Children should NOT be treated like Dogs... It annoys me when you see something saying, "No children, or Dogs allowed " gggrrrhhh!
Yes, kids like dogs do make a mess and damage things, but if your a single parent, and no child minder, its a little bit harder to fathom out who to leave your Dcs with , so you have no choice but to take them.
I reckon if people dont want to eat with kids around then stay at home !

"but if your a single parent, and no child minder, its a little bit harder to fathom out who to leave your Dcs with , so you have no choice but to take them." - yes thats me but if I'm invited somewhere that isn;t child friendly (eg nephews 18th birthday dinner) and I can't get a babysitter then I don't go.

So there is always a choice.