Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

to wish my mum would stop buying DS toys from car boots/charity shops?

100 replies

cupcakesandbunting · 19/04/2010 21:25

Without wanting to sound really ungrateful, I'm starting to get a little miffed with my mum buying DS stuff from car boots/charity shops. Not because there's anything up with shopping at these places but I think that some things you buy from them, some you don't.

For instance, today she brought him round a Roary the Racing car race track (bit like a mini Scalextric set. She bought it and thought it was good cos she got it for £2 and it was newish-looking and they're £25 in the shops. She totally doesn't get the concept that it's being sold brand-new in box for £2 for a reason Anyway, we spend ages setting it up for DS and without being mean, it's shit. The cars don't stay on the tracks, the wires to the controllers keep coming detached from the battery box etc. It takes forever to set up and DS loves it. He wants to play with it all the bloody time and I don't have 30 minutes to set it up each time he wants to play with it. It's alright her buying it then swanning off and leaving me to deal with this very impractical toy. Sorry, I know I sound like a cow

Aside from this, she takes no notice of whether there is a kitemark on the box with a lot of things or whether bits can easily come off when DS plays with it. DS has plenty of toys without having loads of junk toys piled on top. Today I snapped a bit and said "maybe we can keep this track at nanna's to play with?" and she wouldn't let me send it back with her because she didn;t want to spend ages setting it up at hers! Ha!

I know I sound ungrateful and I expect I'll get told as much but just needed to vent...

OP posts:

Original poster

cupcakesandbunting · 20/04/2010 11:10

Lynnexxo, thankyou. I don't feel like I'm being a mean old bird now They're about £20-25 in Argos/Sainsbury's. I'd be cheesed off if I spent that much on such piffle.

Phoenixflower, DS is two

OP posts:

mangoandlime · 20/04/2010 11:22

RooBear...hahahahaha! No waaaaay!!??!!

Oh I'm so envious! I can still hear the way it spoke too, and I haven't even seen one for about 30 years!

RooBear · 20/04/2010 11:45

me and my sister refused to let my mum throw it out if i ever find another I will send it on to you!

'i'm falling apart ah ha'

mangoandlime · 20/04/2010 11:55

Good for you for holding on to yours RooBear, if it's the real deal you'll have a real collectors' item on your hands!

Talk Up Dolls

lilmissmummy · 20/04/2010 12:04

YANBU my mother does the same - drives me crazy, about 2 weeks after comes I take it all back to the charity shop. How many cuddly toys does my ds need at 9? He has a room full!

bobthebuddha · 20/04/2010 12:27

I'm going to add a bit to my earlier post - MIL buys lots of tat for the kids, my own Mum has bought one solitary charity shop toy for them, a grubby little rabbit which the kids love and I do too, despite its grubbiness. It's a painful reminder that she's rapidly succumbing to senile dementia & isn't really my Mum any more. I'd give anything for her to be capable of buying the kind of crap that DH's mum (and yours) lands us with. So I still say go with it...life is short and you don't know which way it can turn.

MrsBadger · 20/04/2010 12:38

I managed to sidetrack my crap buying bargain-scavenging mother into buying books but mostly clothes for the dc rather than toys

if they are really horrid I sneakily pass them on, the passable stuff is fine for nursery and she does get the odd gem from the charity shop at the smart end of town

and the best thing is they grow out of them so ultimately you don't have to keep them at all.

DorotheaPlenticlew · 20/04/2010 12:42

DP and his sister had that same talking doll! He still mentions it, quotes from it etc, which is how I know it's the same one.

And cupcake, agree w you that second-hand stuff in general is great. It's just you have to be selective ... and when it happens to be tacky, useless space-eating crap, well, pshaw to that!

poorbuthappy · 20/04/2010 12:49

OMG! I have 1 of those talk up dolls...ours says "carry me I'm portable.." mostly...but unfortunately she is slightly chewed around the face area, but it is understandle considering her age.

I am now going to my mums under the pretense of letting her see the twins, and will be rooting round the toy box shortly!

poorbuthappy · 20/04/2010 12:51

understandable obviously...

mangoandlime · 20/04/2010 13:06

Wow!, my sis and me thought we were the only people in the world to have those dolls!

I'm of course expecting commission if any of you sell them and turn into milwonairres, Del Boy stylee. Please update PBH if you manage to find yours!

mangoandlime · 20/04/2010 13:07

I must apologise for the major thread drift here, OP.

Original poster

cupcakesandbunting · 20/04/2010 13:10

No need to apologise, Mango

I hate it when threads never veer like a normal conversation. I treat them like normal conversations because I am a sad cow, heh heh

OP posts:

NordicPrincess · 20/04/2010 13:36

i think we might have the same mum! i try to explain to her that a child has no concept of monetary value, he asks can we go to nanas so shel buy me something? or nana what have you got for me? its turning him into a spoilt brat and everytime hes out with me hes asking for things because nanas always getting him stuff, things i cant afford. its all a load of junk and i make her keep it at her house. shes so controlling, she buys him clothes or changes his outfits for clothes she got him at her house because she prefers what she braught. cash rich time poor. really really dont like her

Original poster

cupcakesandbunting · 20/04/2010 13:49

Wow, Nordicprincess. I wouldn't go so far as to say I don't like my mum although she irritates me like no-one else ever could

My DS also is constantly asking visitors "what have you got for me?" when they come to our house because he is so used to my mum turning up with some piece of junk in her bag. He also expects it of his other two nanas. It's really frustrating when I made it clear before DS was born that I was determined he wouldn't be a spoiled kid that that's exactly what he is becoming.

OP posts:

PhoenixRising · 20/04/2010 13:55

YANBU - I can see how this is frustrating. Talk to her about it

CuppaTeaJanice · 20/04/2010 14:06

I have a solution.......

You need to plant the seed of an idea in your Mum's head (and possibly your son's) that your DS really likes books. Make a big deal of reading with him whenever she's around. Get him to proudly show her his book collection. Rabbit on endlessly about the lovely books in the library, how expensive books are at Smiths etc.

There are just as many secondhand books on sale at boot sales, charity shops etc as plastic tat, and unlike crappy toys, they are usually in pretty good condition. They are also small, flat, quiet and easy to store!

If she's busy searching for books, then she won't notice the piles of broken plastic shit that would otherwise be so enticing!!!

everythingiseverything · 20/04/2010 14:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

cupcakesandbunting · 20/04/2010 14:19

Cuppatea, I am so trying that

OP posts:

Curiousmama · 20/04/2010 16:14

Great idea CTJ

poorbuthappy · 20/04/2010 20:49

cupcakes...more apologies for the threadjack...

Mango, I can confirm that "our family" own a silly talk doll (that's her name apparently!!)...I have to say "our family" because suddenly there is a lot of talk about who the doll actually belongs to...

It was bought for my sister in 1971 and whilst she has survived being played with by 7 children over the years she is definitely looking slightly worse for wear. The faces of these dolls are paper stuck on to the plastic and quite a lot of it has been gnawed off over the years.

Ooooo off to do some research I think!

mangoandlime · 22/04/2010 09:52

poorbuthappy.

Ah yes, I remember the paper faces! Did you have a lok at the link I posted? I've often thought about my lost doll but I didn't know what they were called.

''Here comes my bodeee'' ''Ooops, I lost my head for a moment'' ''wow, that's quite a stretch'' Ahh the nostaligia! Mine had a white dress (quite plasticy with a sort of clear plastic covering?) with a large orange or pink flower on the front, my sister's was orange.

Let me know what you come up with!

2rebecca · 22/04/2010 11:27

I wouldn't have wanted my kids to associate a visitor coming with getting toys, especially if they are a frequent visitor. For me toys are bought for xmas, birthdays or a special treat. They aren't a weekly occurrance.
I would ask her to cut it down. If kids have loads of stuff they don't value it as much.
If she lives locally I'd say she can buy extra stuff to keep at her house but no more stuff at your house.

GeekOfTheWeek · 22/04/2010 12:05

My gran does this and although i'm not a fan of plastic crap, I love her too much to hurt her feelings by telling her its unwanted. And it would hurt her feelings.

Better to graciously accept, offer thanks and then bin/charity shop. Happy all round.

Omarlittlest · 22/04/2010 12:53

I agree with 2rebecca. I think they should be glad to see grandparents without a present in hand and this is a good argument to use; that you want your DCs to be happy to see grandparents for themselves ...

In all honesty i think OP that YABU. Yours is IMO a luxury problem ... far better that you have such attentive relations than the other way around

Flip

1 2 3 4