I have never understood the 'your mum has had her children and is now living her own life' attitude
Personally I will never stop being a mum to my ds and dd. I will want to carry on helping, supporting and nurturing whatever their age or life circumstances. Of course I will have limits and boundaries and will always need time to myself and a life of my own, but that can incorporate help for my dc. Much the same as now when they are little
Mothering to me is not a finite concept - here I birthed you and raised you now run along and let me have a life of my own. You should always be a mother
Naturally what follows should be a close and nurturing relationship with your grandchildren who might grow up a little happier and more secure because their mum/dad had great support from the older generation. Then in turn they might mother/father their own children well. It is an investment of love that stretches across generations.
So no it is not unreasonable to expect support from your mother but then I expect the very fact that you are rasing this question means there are dysfunctional dynamics to the relationship which might be hard to face up to. With a proper mother/daughter relationship and mutual respect the support needed can be ascertained naturally and freely without jeapordising anyone's need for free time and individual space.
I feel this is just one of the many factors which underpins the many damaged and dysfunctional family relationships. The many responses that stated it is unreasonable to expect help from ones mother higlights this. Out of interest do those of you who hold this opinion expect to take a back step and selfishly life your own lives when your own children are grown?
And lets face it having a baby is one of the most difficult, vulnerable and trying times a person will face. I for one will be there for my children during this time offering support and love as always and in any way which is helful (which of course will be to back off at times as well!)
Just as now when at times I feel drained by my children's needs and demands and silently scream for just a little more time - I am not a perfect mother who is endlessly patient, giving and kind. So in the future I will at times struggle with these feelings too. But that is also the glory of being a mother, this battle in which hopefully the unconditional love for the being you have created wins.
The lack of comfort and joy of a close extended family is to be found in such selfish principles I think