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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not really want to give my toddler a cup of tea?

92 replies

goandshowdaddy · 02/04/2010 18:08

My MIL is always asking me whether I've given my DS (22 months old) a cup of tea yet. I haven't and don't really feel the need to!

AIBU to not give him a cuppa every once in a while? I'm not really sure why I don't want to - don't have any hard facts about whether it's good or bad for him but just don't feel like he's missing out by not having it.

MIL says she used to be given tea with a bit of sugar in it to make it taste nicer...

OP posts:
pranma · 02/04/2010 22:44

dgs likes a cuppa with grandma-I put about a cm of tea in his cup and add a bit of water topped up with cold milk.He is 3.6 and loves it but he prefers very diluted earl grey with lemon or home made lemon and ginger with a bit of honey.

ouryve · 03/04/2010 00:07

YANBU, since it's not good for toddlers.

I do, however, occasionally give my 6 year old a cup of weak tea when he's under the weather. It does a good job of perking him up.

pinkiepunksmummy · 03/04/2010 00:07

My three DC (6, 7 & 10) always start the day with a nice mug of tea (no sugar)....as do my whole family. Sometimes they have one in the afternoon too. When we go to a cafe/restaurant, they always ask for a pot of tea to pour themselves, and love the novelty of it (and the sachet of sugar!!) ....they don't drink Coke/Fruitshoots/bright coloured pop etc., never have. Surely tea must be less evil??

Am wondering what the other posters older children, who don't drink tea, drink first thing in the morning, as I can't imagine having anything but tea!!

ouryve · 03/04/2010 00:22

My kids drink plain water for most of the day. DS1 has the odd drink of weak squash with meals.

MangoTango · 03/04/2010 00:26

YABU. Toddlers absolutely must be given cups of tea!

porcamiseria · 03/04/2010 09:37

!!!!!!!!!!!

strange MIL, just ignore or LIE, or say they only like lapsang souchang

wedlocked · 03/04/2010 11:41

Tea is definitely not a bad drink! My son has always had unsweetened weak tea or water as drinks (only fizzy drinks if he got it outside home) and he has beautiful teeth with no fillings (he's a teenager).
Tea is a million times better than Ribena or all that other sweet rubbish.

cheezcurl · 03/04/2010 11:59

Yes, my dd regularly asks and she gets given rooibos, which has no tannin and no caffeine and is high in antioxidants and quite good for you. But personally I would never give normal tea or coffee to a small child.

cheezcurl · 03/04/2010 12:01

Although agree that given a choice between tea and fizzy drinks or squash etc I would go with the tea every time!

ooojimaflip · 03/04/2010 12:01

Tea does not have sugar in it. Or milk come to that. You can have your sweetened, dairy diluted tea based drinks if you like, I'm sticking to tea.

My daughter (2y 3m) hasn't had tea - but she hasn't had any other hot drink yet either.

bambipie · 03/04/2010 12:09

I don't think it matters either way! They don't have to have tea, and I wouldn't think strong tea with two sugars would be sensible. My dd is just two and loves to have the last bit of my tea, I have it very weak and milky with no sugar. She generally asks for it in social situations so she can join in, otherwise she has only tasted water or milk.

CrankyTwanky · 03/04/2010 21:05

Monty, you capitalist bastard. Don't you know all proper tea is theft?

Dominique07 · 03/04/2010 21:14

I do NOT think tea is a good idea for young babies or toddlers and would hope not to see my DS drinking this addictive substance for a while yet. I personally LOVE tea, whilst I think it tastes horrible, so I guess its just the addiction that tells me I want it. I know that some people really do give their babies and toddlers tea in a bottle, but I just don't think they know what they are doing!
Herbal tea however, must be ok.

snigger · 03/04/2010 21:21

Mine have Rooibos tea, since very early on (South African dad) - it's caffeine free, high in anti-oxidants, and very very good for the digestion.

Aged 7 and 9 now, they have theirs with milk and honey or just honey and I think they enjoy the comradeship of an early morning cuppy with Mum & Dad without any of the side effects for them, or guilt for us.

Start them early though, I can't get my head round the stuff, tastes foul to me, but DH and the junior section love it.

DreamsInBinary · 03/04/2010 21:24

I spoke to my doctor about the iron absorption, and he told me that you would need to drink it very strong and in enormous quantities to have any adverse effects.

If you don't want your DS to drink tea, wouldn't the simplest solution be to just tell your MIL?

Lizzylou · 03/04/2010 21:28

Funny, My Mom (who hates tea, never drinks it herself) started asking when DS1 would be having a cup of tea from when he was about 3mths old.
He has never had tea as far as I know,
just hasn't happened, no conscious decision.

It is your choice what your child drinks.

diddl · 04/04/2010 08:59

Well I always used to feel sorry for children who were given tea as I thought their parents were too poor to afford juice.

runnybottom · 04/04/2010 10:19

Some of you need to get a grip, its TEA, not crack.

helyg · 04/04/2010 10:23

YANBU.

My 3 are 4, 5 and 7 and none of them have ever had tea or coffee.

They like hot chocolate, and the eldest occasionally has a fruit tea. They also like a babycinno (frothy milk in an espresso cup) in Costa

It's a personal choice, but I'm in no rush to give mine tea or coffee.

helyg · 04/04/2010 10:26

pinkiepunksmummy: my three have pure fruit juice with their breakfast, if it is really cold they might have hot milk or hot chocolate.

wedlocked · 04/04/2010 12:01

Pure fruit juice is really bad for their teeth - hot chocolate is full of sugar. Can't really understand why it's preferable to give your children these drinks and not tea.
But hey - give them what you want, just don't feel superior about it!
As Runnybottom says tea is hardly a class A drug!

MisSalLaneous · 04/04/2010 12:14

YANBU.

If however you consider it in future, you could try a caffeine free alternative.

I see it's mentioned already, but if it got to the point where ds wanted to join us when having our morning coffee, I'd give him Rooibos tea. It's caffeine free, full of antioxidants, low in tannins compared to "normal" tea, and good for digestion. Some benefits here.

I have given ds cooled black rooibos with a little honey when he's coughing a lot and milk makes the phlegm worse.

For now, I'm not giving him a hot / warm drink in the morning solely because I want him to be careful of our hot coffees. He is 2, btw.

MisSalLaneous · 04/04/2010 12:18

Not that I think "normal" tea would be the worst thing in the world - not at all - but at the same time, I don't think not having it is bad.

helyg · 04/04/2010 12:28

Hot chocolate isn't full of sugar if it is made with milk and cocoa powder, any more than tea is full of sugar if it is made without it!

Mine have one glass of fruit juice at breakfast. The rest of the day they drink mainly water or sometimes milk.

I have been drinking fruit juice with breakfast since I was a child and have no fillings. All three of my children have very healthy teeth too, so it doesn't seem to be doing them any harm.

HopeForTheBestExpectTheWorst · 04/04/2010 12:37

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