To bar my child from seeing her cousin as she has been infected with head lice at least 4 times from her now.

[Katyathegringa]

My husband's niece has had head lice for at least 2 years now (seriously), the reason being that although her mum throws a treatment on every now and again, because her hair is so long and thick they are never 100% successful. The suggestion that she cut her hair a bit to make it more manageable and easier to get rid of was greeted with scorn due to the fact that she doesn't want cut the "beautiful curls off the bottom of her hair".

So, each time my daughter (20 months) and her are together within days sure enough she is scratching again, and 5 minutes after so am I. We then have to go through the rigmarole of treating ourselves - until the next time they get together when the cycle starts all over again. We have got to the stage now when DD's nursery is complaining that the staff and children are being infected.

I have tried to have a word with DH, whose response is "well what do you expect me to do about it!", and "you aren't seriously suggesting they don't see each other any more?!", the only thing he did suggest is that we treat DD's hair after each visit - I have nor the time nor the money to doing head lice treatments every week or so.

So, any suggestions? Or am I being totally unreasonable.

its free for kids on prescription - so you could in theory build up a stock so when there is a visit you could do the girls hair

i think it must be horrible for the girl - she must have sores in her head, and she will end up being excluded y other people just as you are doing - becuase her mother is a twunt

You're right - it is horrible and she does have sores, and the last thing I want is to bar them from seeing each other, for a start it means that one of our babysitting resources is out of the window (totally selfish I know)! but I don't see how else I can get through to the mother.

I could build up a stock, but pouring chemicals on my daughter's hair (and mine for that matter) is not something that I want to do long term.

Has anyone used those head lice repelling shampoo's (i.e. the prophylactic treatments) and if so, with success?

Asda's do a lice repellant shampoo & conditioner and spray (i think it's just tea tree) but also hairspray is a good repellent, My DD has long hair and used to get lice alot at nursery, in the end, I used to do her hair in a tight ponytail sprayed with Elnett and then the pony tail plaited, it seemed to do the trick.
Feels a bit strange spraying a child with hairspray, but she used to feel like a grown up and I'd just just put leave in conditioner on once a week to revitalise her hair.

You've made my head itch now!!!

Mine too - and pretty sure I don't have them at the moment

Unfortunately I can't yet do the hairspray and tie back thing as he hair isn't really long enough yet - and she wails when I try to even put a clip in it, but will definitely try the ASDA stuff. Thanks.

we just condition heavily and then nit-comb - even on the long hair of dd1. as long as you do it frequently it's effective, and no chemicals.

only had lice twice (scratches) and youngest is 6 now. the trick is to do it often so that they don't get a chance to get comfy [yurk]

we used the chemicals and stuff with the first lot, but it was so horrible that we just condition/ nit comb now.

i did buy some nitty gritty at one point, but it was pretty awful. tea tree shampoo etc is just not moisturising enough to deal with long/ curly or tangly hair - nightmare.

conditioner and nit comb. horrid to deal with long-standing cases, and is v tempting to cut the lot off. doesn't always work though - a friend used to shave her boys heads regularly

don't stop seeing them, just arrange a day for a hair combing party

if it helps, my mil bought me an electric nit zapper thing (that won't actually go through either of my dd's hair) as her other grand-daughter was suffering quite badly from repeat cases at school, and she thought it might be useful at some point i think it went to the charity shop

oh - and everything in front of the tv for littlies - it was the only way mine would sit still long enough to be combed...

it is really important for her to get used to having her hair tied up though - maybe a bit later for school lol, but again - i always did my girls when they were eating thier breakfast and sitting in their highchair/ at the table. not particularly hygienic lol (hair with your taost anyone) but it got it done with the minimum of wailing...

tying it up for school/ nursery is pretty much the only way of attempting to steer clear...

The nit comb I think is the best way to keep them at bay, wouldn't be without mine! My dd has thick hair ok it can be a bit of a ball-ache sometimes but if you do it regularly it works.

Ah, glad you mentioned the nit zapper thing as I was thinking of buying one - don't think I will bother now

I bought a nitty gritty comb yesterday, and I guess I will just have to make sure that when she has seen her that I go through hers (and my) hair with it and conditioner. I have just seen that they do a repellent spray too - so may invest in some.

I feel awful as DD and her cousin get on so well - but being a full time working mother with little enough time and money on her hands, these recurrent infections and treatments are becoming somewhat of a bind.

How about inviting the cousin for a sleepover/makeover - then you could do the nit thing on her!!!

I could try - I have done before actually, but is is so incredibly long (almost to her waist) and thick it is almost impossible, hence why I've suggested cutting it a bit shorter until they have been totally eradicated (not an option apparently!)

how could you possibly have them for 2 years. if you dont treat them they just increase daily. so i would have thought with in 2 months they woud be intolerable?

someone i used to know had a child who had nits pretty much constantly for years, treatment was never quite 100 % consistent or effective, so always a few lice/eggs left behind and he would never be clear of them.

denitting a very nitty head is absolutely boaksome, i helped once, it was revolting

so uncomfy for the child to be so itchy too

WE have a similar problem with a family member. I now only ever use tea tree shampoo on my girls (It's called a headlice repellant) and also the same conditioner every 3 days along with a Nitty Gritty comb (£10 over the counter or free on prescription), I also spray tea tree leave in repellant on their hair in the mornings and so far we've been nit free for approx 6months, even after spending an afternoon with the nit-ridden relative!

as per my OP kylesmybaby - they are treated - but ineffectively

Will she keep a hat or bandana on?

She wears hats on a daily basis - not tried a bandana, but maybe I'll give it a go. Am going to get some of the lice repellent and start using it as a matter of course.

Yes, why not just have your DD wear a hat.I'm nor sure why you think cutting your neice's hair will solve the problem.The lice surely live near the scalp where they can get at the bloodstream,not down at the ends near her waist!
The reason she has had them for so long despite treatment, is more likely to be that she is being reinfected than the treatment hasn't worked because her hair is too long.

You need to get assertive here. Tell your DH that DD is not going to visit until all lice are gone.
Tell your SIL the same.
Stand your ground on this, it isn't fair for your niece to suffer nits for this long, and not healthy for DD to keep having chemicals sloshed all over her little head.

YANBU and I wouldn't tolerate this either.

my child has long thick hair and it's really not a problem getting de-loused if you do it properly (esp if you use hedrin, imo). she was reinfected many times but now she's older (9) it's calmed down a bit. I think the peak age for her was 6, when girls stand in huddles v close together

No brassband, the reason she has had them for so long is because they are't being effectively removed from her hair in the first place - hence the suggestion that to have a successful eradication her hair needs to be more manageable. I have on numerous occasions seen eggs and live lice still in her hair immediately after a treatment.

So, absolutely nothing to do with whether the lice or eggs are close to the scalp or ends - think about the logistics of removing all lice and eggs from very long thick hair compared to those of trying to successfully remove them from a child with a long bob for example.

To be honest - I couldn't care less whether the solution to the problem is by cutting her hair or her mother being more careful when doing the treatment - as long as they are gotten rid of and as a result don't infect my DD or I as often (I do know that you can't stay away from them at all times)

If you're not allergic to the saliva then you don't itch.

However to have an infestation of nits for 2 years to the point of sores then that is neglect......

I would slap a load of thick sensitive conditioner in her hair and leave it in while they are playing together, then wash it out when you go home. The nits won't be able to get a foothold and your baby will have fabulous hair!