Bathing isn't *me* time, it's a basic necessity

[OprahWinfrey]

Do you have any Me time, and what do you do with it?

I hate baths.

And bubbles, they get in my hair when I lie down.

Me time is overrated IMO. Sharing on the other hand is not.

Not always Expat. I co-sleep with DD and one of us goes up with her. The other one tidies and washes up etc. Not much space there. Except for the three days I am at work, she is pretty much tied to me.

I hear you bumpybecky!

We also have a dd that is nearly 12 which means later bedtimes and less of us being able to watch things that arent suitable for young girls.

We also have a DS that is 7 months old so early mornings and late evenings with children, the worst of both worlds..

My baby does'nt go to bed until I do (she is usually asleep on DH or my lap)

THere's been a lot about this on here recently.. and I think the conversation tends to always fall into the extremes..

Why can't we just be sensible about it?

Yes, the kids will only be small for a short while..

No, I don't have any outside help..

No, my DH is very rarely home to be involved on weekdays

No, my kids don't sleep all that well so I can NOT totally relax at home after they've gone to bed..

No, I Don't need 15 hours a week down the gym, thank you..

But maybe to just read a book in peace? Go for a brisk walk on a nice evening? Do something for me?

I don't think it's anything to be ashamed of..

same here, we havn't had a bath since DS was born, all showers since then, baths used to be US time though

Don't your children sleep?
I've never had a problem with having time for hobbies etc. With working I was often happy to spend time with the kids, but if I wanted to do something then my husband looked after the kids or I got a babysitter. They went to bed at a sensible time and I then had the evenings for baths, reading etc.

i have about 2 baths a year - dh points me in the direction of one when I am not feeling well, it always works and I never seems to think of it myself.

I am currently mumnetting while dd is at preschool, I normally do my paperwork for work but today I didnt have much. Feel a bit bored actually.

I don't get people who have to have set slots of me time where they "escape", BUT I do have a husband who shares the parenting and as a result I go out with friends occasionally, I go to an exercise class once a week and we take it in turns to do bathtime/bedtimes. If I had a husband who refused to do any parenting jobs then (liek my friend in that situation) I might feel the need to have set slots of time when I knew I was able to do something I chose.

ooops misssed the OP entirely there

bathing/washing is a necessity of course, long bubble baths with candles and choclate biscuits, whilst nice are not essential

LOL at Paisleyleaf .

My sister (you know who you are) always brings her 2 DSs round my house and then has an urgent need to use the loo for ages.

She thinks I don't know she's taking sneaky Me Time, but I do.

I personally don't find baths relaxing - i'll shave my legs quick and get out. Maybe it's because i like the water practically at boiling point.

Time in my studio is obv very much me - time although it is work too.

That's not 'me' time, mamsnet. That's sharing a load, his doing his fair share.

My eldest is 6, my youngest is 1.

I don't go out, don't work outside the home at present, have outside help, spare money, etc.

When DH is home, he does his fair share, same as I do mine.

I bath for one hour, every evening, when ds2 is in bed. It's the same hour that ds1 is allowed on the xBox and the same hour that DH plays some long-winded game on the laptop without me tutting/rolling my eyes etc.

I also have two mornings when I go to the gym when ds2 is in the creche and one morning when his gps take him out for a couple of hours.

Then I do two evenings at karate, putting the bath back to afterwards.

I really really don't care whether other people find this excessive/nowhere near enough- it's what I am comfortable with and feel is essential to my sanity, health and well-being.

I will add though that I am not and never have been the kind of person who needs or likes 'company' all the time so as far as the bathing is concerned, that solitude is a necessity.

I am looking forward to getting back to work. That will be my "me" time

I am not keen on the phrase "me time" either.

It's having a break, isn't it.

I love 'me time'...

On a saturday morning I spend at least 2 hours bathing, shaving, plucking, exfoliating, conditioning, face masking and generally faffing around at my leisure.

I had a bath this morning and told both dc to go away and play somewhere else because I wanted peace and quiet.

They didn't and I shared my bath with iggle piggle, upsy daisy and makka pakka as well as an assortment of plastic bath toys.

Then ds needed a poo and I had to wipe his bum, then dd needed a poo...and lying in a bath scented with poo was not appealing so I got out.

That is why I usually bath at night when they are asleep-at least I stand a chance of enjoying it then.

Lol at paisleyleaf

I never knew before ds that bathing was a selfish act. I thought it's something everyone does. Yes, even if that means you feel like a 1 hour soak with bubbles and candles to relax. You would only do that because you need to relax after a stressed day. So again, it's a necessity! Me time for me is lunch with my friends. NO TODDLERS ALLOWED. Again, something you need to do to remain an adult in a toddler shaped world.

I keep reading about me time in the papers and mum books. I think I know what they mean but ideally, having a baby is a shared responsibility. I never hear fathers needing any ME time?? They just go down the pub, or watch football no matter how much the baby is crying!

I say bay-thing Su (SouthEast)

I have one DS aged 5, so once he is on bed at 19.00, it is all 'Me time' as he very rarely needs attention after that.

Ans I take my baths very hot with a drink and a book. Tends to get run about half hour after DS has gone to bed. Bliss!

Saying that, if I bathe with him about, I get my back scrubbed as he is adamant he wants to help!

I like a bath I do. Except I now have a cunning ruse when I make it so hot that the kids can't share it AND the bathroom gets so stuffy that DH won't come in for a poo while I'm wallowing

I'm not keen on the concept of formal 'me time' as an essential part of the day/week. But I do sometimes need time to be somwhere when no one is talking to me or at me. That may mean 5 minutes in the bath or it may mean an afternoon walking by myself. DH needs to be surrounded by people all the time -I need solace sometimes otherwise I get narky, stressed and a bit claustrophic.

oh Expat, sure you believe.

I have a 'me' time bath, or a need to have bath. there's a difference dependant on what OH is working

I get to have a 'me' time bath once a fortnight.

I literally submerge my head (only nostrills protuding)

I get 'me time' cinema /afternoon once a week. but we wont go into that

Sassybeast - I remember the 'DP/DH poos'! Thank goodness I don't have to suffer that any more!