to consider myself a feminist whilst also liking to wear makeup and be attractive (to men)?

[kittycat37]

I was watching that BBC 4 'Women' programme and it was suggested that considering oneself a feminist and wanting to wear makeup/wear clothes that emphasise femininity were somehow contradictory.

I honestly feel I can be a feminist and also want to emphasise my feminity through makeup / clothes. AIBU?

Realised I've just contradicted my OP completely - I'm just confused.

Anyfucker - yes they do and sometimes I think that's a good thing and sometimes I don't.

dunno why I posted that twice

Re the socially conditioned part that Kittycat refers to - does anyone know when women in the western world started shaving their legs, underarms etc? I too would love to never bother again but .....

I'm guessing the 1920s when skirts started going up but that's just my guess. I'd love some info on it.

Kitty, I think your list is simply personal preference and has nothing to do with feminism, as I think you've said.

And another thing I'm confused about.....

I don't actually care if my DH watches porn. But I'm still a feminist. I know that doesn't wash with many other feminists. It's just the way I feel.
I'm willing for others to try and re-educate me.

There was a very recent and long thread on porn. You could read that.

You seem to be saying that you want to appear feminine, but draw the line at being sexy (from the comments on your list). I think that most people don't think of one as being more negative or extreme than the other. I don't think it is anti-feminist to look sexy.

people have been making themselves attractive to the opposite sex since time Adam and Eve's time

or since we were all amoeba's

or whatever is your preferred notion of how we all came about

the species would die out, would it not, without sexual drive

what I find difficult to reconcile is the plastic fakery of how some women abuse their bodies...when most men of the non-twat variety seem to like how a woman's body is naturally made a complete turn-on

kitty, could I make a very gentle request that we don't steer this down the porn route

it's kinda been done a lot recently and I am tired of it

however, I am happy to be outnumbered if necessary, and will happiy skip off to poke some trolls or summat

*happily

I find it interesting that you want to "emphasise" your femininity. Why emphasise it?

Men have as many different sexual tastes as you can imagine. Some do like the plastic fantastic. My chap has a marked preference for small, mad, goth girls .

Most of the pressure to look a certain way comes from other women and gay fashion designers.

What is "emphasising femininity"? Isn't it feminine enough just to be a woman?

Come and read my Nightmare Parcel Incident thread in Chat if it goes porn-y, AF

I agree that there's nothing wrong with wanting to look attractive, but also that making it all about sex-appeal is a bit dodgy. That's a good balance, imo.

thanks BOF, will hold that in reserve (the parcel thingy)

think am ready for bo-bo's though

So maybe 'emphasising' was a bad choice of words - it's a question of degree I guess. I suppose to me 'emphasising' my feminity means wearing a top that demonstrates that I have boobs rather than one that shrouds my shape - to others that might not be 'emphasising' at all, or it may be over doing the sex appeal according to one's take.

Fair enough to avoid the porn question AF....I might review some of the old threads t to see if answers crop up.

sorry kitty, don't mean to hector, you can talk about what the heck you like

I just thought this thread was interesting enough without that old chestnut of porn sullying it

and the porn threads always get really polarised, heated and often rather nasty (IME)

there is a very long one somewhere...it covers just about everything

it ain't pretty though

I'm a bit of a MN virgin AF so I'm yet to experience the joys you describe. Hmmmmmm.........has anyone heard that Samantha Cameron is pregnant? (speaking of old threads)

really kitty ?

must be a slow news day week

So you see your breasts as emblematic of your femininity? Or your femaleness? When you say femininity, what do you mean?

what about looking good for ones self?

I do think the waxing thing is rank but as for the rest - wear what you want to wear - look how you want to look

But I dress for NO MAN

Ooh - a bit hectoring there perhaps. Sorry .

I'm a feminist and I wear what I bloody well like regardless of what anyone else thinks.