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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

That if this is really true it is one of the worst things i have heard in ages.

42 replies

TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2010 22:26

I met DS1 after school today and he was a bit subdued. As we walked up the road he started talking about an incident that had happened between 2 pupils, I have to admit i was not listening 100%.I stopped dead in my tracks when he said

"and a boy in from other house (their school is split into 3 houses) met up with a girl from my house and he has raped her, everyone is talking about it he has been excluded and the police were in the school today"

I was really shocked and am sat here in a terrible state, ok i know it was not anything to do with me but hell it churned up some of my own shit.

These are a 12yr old boy and an 11yr old girl.

OP posts:

jenduff · 18/03/2010 22:28

OMG that is horrific
TLES I hope you're ok

Adair · 18/03/2010 22:28

Horrible. Poor kids.

MathsMadMummy · 18/03/2010 22:29

OMG!!!

really hope your DS has got the wrong idea somehow? but these things do happen among younger kids these days... horrible but true

sorry you're feeling bad (((theladyevenstar)))

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2010 22:30

I really feel for the little girl if its true.

OP posts:

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2010 22:30

I really feel for her if this is true she is a baby still ffs

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Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2010 22:31

MMM, it wasnt just him who told me, there were other kids and parents around and the others were telling their mums. I really hope it is a mix up

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gtamom · 19/03/2010 09:18

Will the school send a letter home to the parents and offer councilling or anything like that?

ChippingIn · 19/03/2010 10:09

TLE - that is terrible. Poor little girl

Coldhands · 19/03/2010 10:20

OMG!! That really is awful. If it only came from your DS, you might be able to say he may have got mixed up but if there are loads of others all saying the same thing then it does sound like it could be true.

wannaBe · 19/03/2010 10:28

and but why the hell is this in ibu?

kreecherlivesupstairs · 19/03/2010 10:28

That is appalling and, if it is true, I feel so sorry for the girl. My dd will be 12 in three years time

GypsyMoth · 19/03/2010 10:31

i will also feel VERY sorry for the boy here,if this turns out untrue/chinese whispers!!

ChippingIn · 19/03/2010 10:38

wannaBe - does it really matter??

AIBU is the most active board - of course people post here.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 19/03/2010 10:40

Of course threeblondeboys is right as well, I really hope it isn't true.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 19/03/2010 11:17

Sorry for not replying earlier but i did the unthinkable and ventured out into the real world argghhhh and i mean Arghhh as i went out for socks for DS2 and spent £50 on clothes [humph]

Anyway I am not sure if the school will send letters out, tbh as i said i really hope it is not true because that poor little girl.

I guess I posted on aibu as i spend most of my time on here so it kind of made sense...

OP posts:

GypsyMoth · 19/03/2010 11:20

so you are only going on 'gossip'?

very dangerous!

TheWorryMaster · 19/03/2010 11:30

Sadly this could be true. I have a 13 year old relative who was raped by her 13 year old 'boyfriend'.

My DS, the same age, was horrified when he found out. It did, however, present the opportunity to have another conversation with him about girls, relationships, respect, sexual feelings, No meaning No.

I find these conversations awkward at first but believe that it is my responsibilty to teach him how to deal with his changing feelings and how he should treat people and especially in these circumstances, how he should treat any future girlfriends that he has.

It is hard to think of my 'baby' being sexually involved with anyone. And in an ideal world he would wait until he met someone special to him but I'm trying to be realistic. It does worry me that so many images of women/young girls are portraying ALL girls as ALWAYS being up for it and I have talked to him about how RL is different than some of the stuff he sees in magazines, music videos, etc.

I have totally gone of track here, sorry!

YANBU to be shocked by the events at the school but I think it is more common than we know as not all cases are reported.

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 19/03/2010 11:34

Its not gossip it is a group of children who were very upset by what has been said. The little girl in question is friend of my friends daughter and it was her who told me yesterday afternoon and then DS1 told me when i met him.

I am not sure if the school would send letters out to say this had happened, tbh I wouldn't want it in a letter if it was my child.

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GypsyMoth · 19/03/2010 11:39

so have the children all heard this? it can start with one person,then gets passed on and becomes 'embellished' and then a parent adds a comment,and on it goes! its gossip!

the school could possibly hols an assembly to address the issues surrounding it,but the investigation will be confidential....as it should be

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 19/03/2010 11:42

I am not sure how many children know about it, I know DS1's class know about it because the girl is in their class and been off for a week.

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Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 19/03/2010 13:22

have just spoken to the school as this situation ha made ds1 really upset and i have an appt on monday with head. anyway yes it is true and the police are involved.

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smallorange · 19/03/2010 13:25

Victims of sexual offences are entitled to anonymity so maybe don't identify her to friends who don't already know, poor little girl.

What an awful situation for everyone.

thumbwitch · 19/03/2010 13:26

TLES, that is bloody horrible. Sorry for your DS and for you - must be bringing back some shite for you too. Hope you can get some help for both of you. and ((hugs))

EllieMental · 19/03/2010 13:29

oh wow.
My son is 12 and still plays with Lego and likes cuddles and secretly has a teddy at night, while being terribly 'cool' in front of his mates etc. I cannot concieve of a child like him doing such a thing to another child.
Godalmighty

Original poster

TheLadyEvenstar · 19/03/2010 13:55

It is sickening. What are these kids watching/seeing??

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