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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want my first mothers day to NOT be crap

57 replies

mrsflux · 14/03/2010 09:30

I got a card made by nursery. That's it. Nothing else different to normal.
Oh and I got thrown up all over as ds has d and v still.

Today sucks.

Yes I know I'm being silly and unreasonable but I can't help it and I'm pretty sure mothers day gets less and less nice as the dc get older.

OP posts:
Original poster
mrsflux · 14/03/2010 10:59

Well I've just told him that I'm miffed. I now feel petty and guilty aswell as fed up and disappointed.
He said he thought the nursery card was more thoughtful than a shop bought one and our plans for lunch out would have been a lovely day.

Well yes but ds has had d and v since thurs so plans has been shaky fir a while. He could have got something when he nipped into m&s for onion bahjis yesterday but didn't.

Lesson learnt - fathers day will be a non event.

OP posts:
teaandcakeplease · 14/03/2010 11:04

I haven't read everyone's reply but my first mothers day, my hubby didn't buy me a card, chocs or anything else for that matter. Didn't even wish me a Happy Mothers Day, nothing.

He didn't get it, didn't get why I was upset. Our Daughter was 8 months. I felt like he thought I didn't count as a mum as our child was still a baby, but I felt like I more than deserved at least a card, as it's hard work taking care of a baby, his baby

He did apologise and later bought me some supermarket flowers and card but I know where you're coming from mrsflux.

I know its hard but try not to get him back on Fathers day. Here's to hoping he realises his faux pas and corrects it.

Happy Mothers Day from me to you though, hope your ds gets better soon x

Hassled · 14/03/2010 11:25

I've had a nice day so far and even DS1, at Uni, sent a card. DD made (yes, made herself) pain au chocolat.

But I still remember the now infamous mother's day a good few years ago where no one remembered at all (how? how could they possibly all have forgotten? how?) and I was so incensed I actually walked out of the house in a rage.

thumbwitch · 14/03/2010 11:40

BUstle, that is shocking! What a strange book.

My Mother's Day started well, got the card (had pressured DH to make sure I did) and we went to a Da Vinci exhibition that I had wanted to go to - and then it suddenly all went to pot after that. I thought it would be nice to go to a café after for a drink, so I mentioned I was parched and DH said "there's water in the car". So I called him a skinflint, he agreed his first reaction was uncalled for and we started to walk up the street to look for a café. Of course, he ignored the one right next to the exhibition building but I thought, since this is his area, he must know what he is about. So - we walk for ~5 mins and he says "you keep walking to find somewhere, I'll go back and get the car". So far, fine.

I keep walking - in 100m there is a burger joint/café - it would have done but DH wouldn't be by for a while yet so I keep walking. And walking. 10 mins later and starting to get sore feet (wrong shoes for pavement walking) and no obvious café, DH rocks up, parks the car and says "get in, this area's crap, I'll take you somewhere else".

Then it goes to shit. After about 15 mins drive, passing lots of places that might have nice cafés, he takes us to a service station, asks me to go and get a bottle of water and a mars bar or something - and then moans that I am so miserable when I have a strop about it! Ah well.

Original poster
mrsflux · 14/03/2010 11:47

teaandcakes thank you!

And happy mothers day to anyone else who feels like today was a big fat waste of time!

OP posts:
TulipsInTheRain · 14/03/2010 11:47

The kids remembered and i got hugs and cuddles at 8am.

They'd made cards at school and playschool and for the first time ever dd had written the inside herself (barely legible but that's beside the point, she's 5)

dp has failed as usual (my old username was actually a referance to the flowers i bought myself for mothers day when dd was a baby and i was preg with ds1 ) but the others are right, mothers day gets better as the kids become able to do stuff themselves.

dd wanted me to get up and make breakfast this morning so that she could serve it to me in bed so i have that to look forward to in a year or two when she's able

dolphin13 · 14/03/2010 11:49

Ditto hassled I stropped off last year. Took myself out for breakfast and hit the shops with dh credit card.In all honesty I was being a complete bitch because dh had worked overnight and didn't get to bed till 6am. He did mean to get up before me.

This year they got it right. Tea in bed, pressies, flowers dh is cooking roast for 10 people bless him.

Far to many hubbies out there not making the effort kick some butt ladies.

TulipsInTheRain · 14/03/2010 11:53

BigWeeHag... i took a lie in while the kids trashed their rooms this morning too

sarah293 · 14/03/2010 11:53

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junglist1 · 14/03/2010 11:55

I'm happy with pictures from my boys and good behaviour. Don't understand how cards and a lunch isn't good enough TBH.

TulipsInTheRain · 14/03/2010 11:59

good behaviour

mine sitting on the couch battering each other and shrieking... all i asked for was good behaviour!

junglist1 · 14/03/2010 12:01

Just because I asked for it doesn't mean I've had it all day . They did go shop for me though.

cluelessnchaos · 14/03/2010 12:05

My first mothers day was utter crap, not a card not a flower not even a bar of chocolate, my dd1 is now 12, dh is workiing away and my 3dc got up at 7 even though dd1 was feeling ill, made me smoked salmon with toast and a pot of coffee, they were going to make me boiled eggs but the gas cannister ran out half way thru. I dont need anything else to feel appreciated, we are having pork pies for lunch and then off to the supermarket, it means much more to me because the kids are doing it not dh or teachers.

fernie3 · 14/03/2010 12:06

well i had two very excited children jump on me at 6:30 waving a card that the oldest (5 year old) had painted, then ate toast (admittedly my husband DID make the toast) and tidied the kitchen - it has been a thrill lol. He is now watching F1 and I am trying to relax and find some new recipes to try but it is hard when my 3 year old is standing next to me saying "what you doinnnnnn"and "can i do puterrrr". Having said that this has been the pattern since my daughter was born 5 years ago so no surprises and you know it could be worse!

sarah293 · 14/03/2010 12:08

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fernie3 · 14/03/2010 12:10

riven - I know my husband has just asked me "whats for lunch!" he was really pleased with himself this morning because he put the toast on a plate when normally he just hands it to me lol - bless hes lovely really.

catastrojb · 14/03/2010 12:23

I got some lovely chocolates from dd - apparently - but dh has hidden them because I have given chocolate up for lent (mostly). Humph. A gorgeous hand-print card from dd though.

Last year, when dd was 2 days old, the clever little thing got me a huge wedge of cambozola as I had been missing it so much while pg!

I don't expect more, just love being a mum .

sarah293 · 14/03/2010 12:27

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OrmRenewed · 14/03/2010 12:27

IME Mother's Day is a shortened version of the real name, "Mother's day to do everything as usual".

With a card thrown in!

And with 2 grannies in the family there's that little bit extra to manage as well.

junglist1 · 14/03/2010 12:45

at the dh hiding the chocs. Not hiding them in his stomach, is he??

catastrojb · 14/03/2010 12:48

I hope not. There will be serious words if he is! I am expecting a sick-making Easter day...

lovely74 · 14/03/2010 12:50

I dropped massive hints so got brekkie in bed, a card from my baby (who cleverly scribbled in it, he's 5mths old!), choccies and a plant. And we're going out for lunch. All wonderful and lovely. except the shine is taken off slightly by the fact that we have to go to MIL's later. What's wrong with that some of you may ask? Well we seen her all the bloody time, she's got lots of other kids and grandchildren who live near her (we don't) who'll visit today, we had a minor fall out last week over her being stupid and insensitive so she's not my fave person at the moment, and THIS IS MY DAY!!!!!!!!

junglist1 · 14/03/2010 12:56

Couldn't your H take the kids while you stay home and chill? Or is it a pressure thing?

Bonnyandborris · 14/03/2010 12:56

Hmmmmm?..tried lowering my expectations but today is still shit. Next year I shall just cancel it completely. What a lot of bollocks.
(sorry to rant)

KatieScarlett2833 · 14/03/2010 13:38

The secret is planning. I did MIL and my Mum's yesterday so today is all about MEEE. I directed my DC to the exact books I wanted in Waterstones yesterday and bought all the ingredients for DH to cook my preferred lunch and evening meal. Incidentally, I got up at 11am, DH has just handed me a bacon, brie and cranberry ciabatta......