WWYD - ?

[elmofan]

ds's friend is moving house tomorrow , his parents have gone to see how their new house is coming along & left their ds (10) playing outside & told my ds also (10) to mind him , that was at one o' clock today , i only found all this out at 4pm when i called my ds in for dinner , i then offered this child dinner but he is not allowed to eat in any one's house (he is a foreign child) it is now starting to get dark outside & cold , and he is out side with no coat, hungry but every time i invite him inside for food he says no thanks . two years ago his father asked me to mind him while he took his wie to work (30 mins drive away) & i ended up minding the child for 4 hours & it was 10pm when he knocked in to collect him with no explanation what so ever , in fact he did not even speak just smiled at me when i opened the door & yes he can speak very good English as dh has spoken to him before ,the boy says his house is locked up & he does not know his parents mobile phone numbers , not sure what to do now but my ds cant stay out there much longer , any advice please ?

Unfortunately you are now in a bit of a difficult situation. I don't think you should just give him back with a shrug and a smile.

Maybe mention you were considering calling the police/ss when they return as it has been so long.

they are moving...it will go straight over their heads!!

If they have just turned up, which I suspect by the lack of posts, and you haven't said anything, then I would suggest a call to social services explaining what has happened. They are putting this boy at risk and that is unacceptable in any culture.

Are they back yet?

Im parents will do this

poor kid

What's happening now?

I am just saying that there is a cultural issue here that the OP needs to be aware of, but of course she must do what she feels is right. This is a gut decision. But if they are moving...maybe a heads up to his school? They may have a PSA, FALW, EAL advisor that can make contact with the family and talk them through acceptable protocol for leaving a child unsupervised.

I hope they are back now and OP is okay x

sorry for lack of posts , had to get my dd (4yrs) to bed . x's parents are still not back , but x is fine , he knows my family since he was 4yrs old & i think feels safe with us but he keeps saying things like " he is imposing" i intend to have a chat with his mum when they get back but i will not get angry as i would be afraid they might take it out on x iykwim , he is a lovely child & it breaks my heart tbh , as he has told me that he babysits his younger siblings a lot when his parents are working & does all the housework . hope they come soon .

You said they were looking at their new house, how far away is it? Would it take over 7 hours to get there and back?

elmo, I really would call someone.

Becuase IF YOU WERE NOT THERE HE WOULD BE STOOD OUTSIDE NOW HUNGRY AND COLD.

I dont understand why you havent called the police?

Where are his siblings?

elmo - you seems to suspect that he's being mistreated. Can see why you wouldn't want to have it out with them, but you will phone someone, will you ?

OMG he is TEN YEARS OLD and BABYSITTING!!! I think a call to SS is definitely in order, this is against the law.

I am not one to say this lightly but I would be calling the police, if not today then on Monday. At least let Social Services know.

If you had not insisted he come inside then he would have been outside for 7 hours now.

he is moving to the next town away from us which is about 25mins drive , his parents took the younger children with them just left x behind to play with my ds as its their last couple of days together , but i wish they had of run it past me first , & not told my ds to mind x tbh ,
x says he is allowed to eat in my house but no where else , he is laughing & playing ATM so not fretting , hopefully they will be back soon & i can have a chat with them , god I'm a wimp when it comes to confrontation though ,

Elmofan, you do really need to inform someone of this - what about calling one of the helplines like childline or samaritans for advice? Without you a 10 year old child would be outside, by himself, cold and hungry - and not knowing when/if his parents are coming back. This is neglect. What is going to happen next time or when they move house and you are not there to help him?

elmo

Why ask 'WWYD'? then ignore the 99% of posters who say 'call the police/ SS'??

tbh, and 'm not one to involve authorities lightly either, but seeing as he is moving and won't be able to 'keep an eye' i would at least inform the school he will be going to so they can watch out for anything

re culture differences, i think this is definitely what it is here, bearing in mind that depending on where they came from in africa he could be killing tigers at his age!

disenchanted - i dont mean to ignore anyone just dont want to upset x ATM , i am thinking his parents took it for granted that i would look after him as i have done so before , might it just be a case of them making me for a mug ?

There are no tigers in Africa.

Sorry but what's going to happen to this lad when he and his family move?? I think you need to call someone, it's not on to just leave him like this. What if they do this when they all move? Where will he go then??

ooops, well you get my point, there is a massive cultural divide

are you sure? am i that clueless?

they are back , DH has just seen their car pull up .

Yes, Lions Africa, tigers India.

Beyond that, I couldn't say what cultural differences are