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Original poster

To think that this cartoon really isn't too "graphic" for seven year olds?

225 replies

squirrel42 · 04/03/2010 20:01

Full news story is here: the latest Mail-sponsored "uproar" is over a sex education cartoon being shown at a primary school. Parents were apparently asked in advance if they wanted to view it first, some weren't able to attend the pre-viewing session but okayed it for their children to see anyway. At least one was later angry enough about what their child saw and some other children "copying" what they'd seen (presumbly not completely) that they have removed their child from the school.

I found a youtube link to the cartoon they're talking about here (NSFW obviously since it has cartoon sexual intercourse in it). Maybe it's my wooly liberal side speaking, but I really don't see what the problem is with that clip. You don't see any erect cartoon penises or a close up of "the action" just the general bodily movements, and sex is presented as an enjoyable activity engaged in by adults who love each other. Not quite what the parent says in their DM quote: "It should have said in the letter children would learn how to have sexual intercourse".

I really don't get what is in the cartoon that is apparently so objectionable for seven to eight year olds. Thoughts?

OP posts:
LauraIngallsWilder · 04/03/2010 22:01

I have an 8yo and would be appalled if he saw that video tbh
Yes I think he needs to know how a baby is conceived - he does we have discussed it, but he doesnt need to see a video showing exactly how its done. He would be horrified and terribly uncomfortable.

pigletmania · 04/03/2010 22:01

They can understand what sex is without watching that.

MillyR · 04/03/2010 22:03

I meant that they might not understand what sex is and the parents might want to keep it that way for a few more years.

Rindercella · 04/03/2010 22:04

Having seen the YouTube link, I thought that the video was appropriate for 10-11 year olds, not 7 year olds. That said, it is a bit rich of a parent to not watch the preview, allow her 7 year old to then watch the video and then kick up a stink about it.

MaisietheMorningsideCat · 04/03/2010 22:04

Nope - 7 too young imo, and pretty graphic. We're very open and have answered every question that's been put to us but at 7 neither of mine were remotely interested in seeing adults have sex, cartoons or otherwise. I wouldn't have been happy with either of them seeing this at 7. 9/10 is about right.

FunkeyMonkeyMoo · 04/03/2010 22:04

I wouldnt want my dd to watch that video. At 7 they only need to know the basics. Not to be shown how it all works.

I had less graphic sex ed in year 10.

paisleyleaf · 04/03/2010 22:05

"cities' Milly?

DrNortherner · 04/03/2010 22:10

I am no prude - quite the oppsite actually but I have a 7 year old and I would object to him seeing that.

There is no need for a 7 year old to see cartoon folk having sex, at all. He is also far too immature (as he should be) to handle the information and would spend the rest of Year 3 chasing girls and imitating cartoon sex movemnets at totally innapropriate moments.

LynetteScavo · 04/03/2010 22:11

No, I wouldn't want my 7yo wathcing it...I had the sound off, if that makes any difrence.

DS1 is in Y6, and I think he's be ready to watch it next year, when he's 12.

Original poster
squirrel42 · 04/03/2010 22:16

Pigletmama I really don't see this as a "how to" video. If you really were trying to take instructions you would only know about moving up and down on top of each other - there wasn't even insert tab a into tab b. Don't you think describing it as pornography is a bit ott?

Around the same age I remember being given a book by my parents with cartoons that demonstrated the "special cuddle" that adults did, and that also showed cross sections of what went where even if there wasn't the animated bouncing up and down. I don't recall being particularly traumatised by the knowledge.

OP posts:
TottWriter · 04/03/2010 22:18

pigletmania, it's really, really, not porn. Good grief, you see a couple of bottoms and line drawings bobbing up and down on each other.

It's also a one minute clip which forms a part of a sex ed film. It's not like they then sit down and are grilled on the subject extensively. All it means is that you don't end up with children hitting puberty and actually being able to do stuff but not understand what these urges they're getting actually are. I was hugely ashamed about the fact that I used to imagine what sex was like because I thought there was something wrong with me for wanting to have sex. If I'd grown up thinking it was a normal part of adolesence and that everyone felt the same way, I would have been less worried that I was abnormal, and less squeamish about finding out about contraception when I met my DP aged nineteen and became sexually active. As it was, from a very young age I avoided anything to do with 'romance' like the plague.

I wish people would stop assuming that any pre-pubescent child who watches a sex ed clip will instantly become a sex addict. What a sad world it is when we have to demonise a normal part of life to 'protect' our children. By far the majority of children will never become a teen pregnancy statistic, yet it is the few who do who become the yardstick by which everyone is judged.

MillyR · 04/03/2010 22:18

Sorry Paisleyleaf, I am tired and my post made no sense. What I meant was:

I would be happy for DD (8) to see this. She has seen animals having sex and animals being born. She has seen it out of the window. Children who live in cities would be viewing sex from a very different starting point, so I can see that their parents might not want them to view this film.

Original poster
squirrel42 · 04/03/2010 22:21

LynetteScavo - just randomly picking up on your comment that you think your DS1 would be ready to see it aged 12, but not aimed specifically at you - given that there have been several well-publicised cases of 12 year old girls becoming pregnant don't you think that would be leaving it a bit late? This particular cartoon is just basic facts-of-life rather than contraception, which I'd hope they've had moved on to by secondary school.

OP posts:
paisleyleaf · 04/03/2010 22:26

LOL Milly , I did wonder what living in a city had to do with it.

Original poster
squirrel42 · 04/03/2010 22:28

TottWriter thanks for that post - your comments certainly resonated with me. I do sometimes think it's a shame that providing factual information about the world seems to get mixed up with giving permission or encouragement to start doing things. No one would argue that seven year olds should be encouraged to start having sex, but I can't see that explaining what it is and what it is for is instantly going to turn them into young teenage mothers and fathers! Knowledge can be tailored to suit children's emotional development and still equip them with the basic facts that will help them to make sense of the world.

OP posts:
bernadetteoflourdes · 04/03/2010 22:40

The reason for the drive on sex education at the mo is the govt's obsession in target cutting ie the number of teenage pregnancies. So if this is the case what was wrong with the stuff they showed us at 13/14 at school in the old days. It must have worked as teenage pregnancies were deffo lower 1n 1978 when I had our lecture I will get a link to the year on year figs if I can. Also what about balance where is the cartoon for sex with same sex couples? It is badly done, badly thought out and parents have evey right to object. Wwhen ds had his talk last year he said that 2 boys chased a girl around the yard and said they were going to "sex" her. The sex game was the new fave in the summer term. When I was training I was told to look out for signs in young children
of sexualisation such as acting out sexually and touching genitals and referring to them in a sexual way. So WHAT DOES THIS SAY ABOUT THIS FILM? The whole thing is a badly thought out Ed Balls Muddle

LynetteScavo · 04/03/2010 22:54

My 11 yo and my 6 year old do know how babies are made...my 4yo DD doesn't yet. They, didn't need a porno cartoon to learn it. We just discussed it very factually.

My 11yo knows you can take tablets to stop a baby growing,(having seen me take them) or you can use condoms. He learned about condoms in school, and tells me they prevent pregnancy and the spread of diseases. He learned that in Y5, of his Catholic school, and I had no idea they were going to teach it to him, so was a bit annoyed, as I would have liked to tell him first, buy hey.

Yes 12 year olds do become accidentally pg, but so do university educated 35 year old married woman who have already had 2 children.

mayorquimby · 04/03/2010 23:07

I like how they've gone inter-racial to really get the mail readers in a state.

TottWriter · 04/03/2010 23:15

mayorquimby - hehe, that's made my night.

LynetteScarvo - It's great that you have explained everything to your children properly, but a lot of parents don't, which is the sole reason that these sex ed videos exist. Children need to get accurate information(Though I would question the feather. DP and I have never felt the need to wear ourselves out leaping on the bed beforehand!), not a one-sided view that someone passes on because of their own experiences or religion, or to miss out altogether because their parents don't take the time. I have friends who figured out about sex by hearing their parents at it (they came in to school complaining that it damaged their minds), but mine were divorced so it was never something I even thought about. Every family is different.

Alambil · 04/03/2010 23:23

Ds ain't watching that....

he doesn't need to know about stiff penises and "wet and slippery" vaginas!!

FFS what happened to kids being KIDS???!

bernadetteoflourdes · 04/03/2010 23:33

Squirrel24 you admit you dont have kids but do you work with kids in any way or do you just like to play a kind of Devils advocate.
Also I don't know what kind of pg films you have been seeing lately but they aren't like that. Maybe you will feel differently when you have a child, but I still beleive it is a crap film on every level aside from any perceived "moral" argument it looks like the graphics were conceived by the same twatty doodlers who came up with the lONDON 2012 slogan.

bernadetteoflourdes · 04/03/2010 23:42

What does it say to a class of all white children (which we have at dd's school) that only black and mixed race couples have sex? And chase each other round on the bed with a f-g feather it is sooo patronising and it has failed on the diversity level

msrisotto · 05/03/2010 09:26

bernadette - Do you really think kids would look at the couple and think that only black and mixed race people have sex? Or do you think they would think that 2 people have sex. Colour isn't the only thing kids see unlike some adults.

diddl · 05/03/2010 09:39

TBH,I think what is more worrying is that some adults are equating it to porn and saying it is completely disgusting.
No wonder British kids are so fücked up about sex!

Philip Larkin had it right!

pigletmania · 05/03/2010 09:42

Well imo 7 is too young for this, when their about 10-11, a lot of kids will be too immature to handle this type of information, and there is no need to see how people have sex at that age, just know the basics. Keep kids as kids. I am 32 so not that old, and I rmember that if I was shown that type of video I would not understand it and might have been scared by it. DD 2.11 is a bit young at the moment, but if when she is older this was going to be shown at her school than yes we would want to see it first and then if we deem it inappropriate for her, to withdraw her from seeing it.

I am no prude and do want to be open with dd but this, no. I know my dd and what she can/cant understand, and yes i want her to be a kid, just concerned with having fun,playing and learning but not this till she is older than 7. For example dd is going to be 3 next week, some children her age understand about body parts and what they are for, willy, minny, bum,breasts etc, but dd does nto have a clue despite me trying to explain to her, she is just not at that stage and not interested tbh.

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