Am I a miserable cow or actually quite reasonable?

[Callisto]

So I was in DD's classroom this am putting her bookbag and lunchbox away and wondering where her teacher was so I could ask a (dumb) question about WBD when another mother who I have exchanged exactly 1 sentence with since Sept, asked if DD would like to come for tea one day.

I was quite suprised so said (and I quote exactly) 'Oh gosh, I've no idea, I'll have to ask her'. Other Mother seemed very put out and muttered something along the lines of 'Oh well, if she ever does...' as she turned away.

Now, firstly was my reaction unreasonable, because that was the impression I got from Other Mother?

And secondly, am I unreasonable to be a bit suprised at the invitation, bearing in mind that I don't even know who Other Mother's DD is and am pretty sure that my DD has never even had a conversation her (OM, that is)?

I have been left feeling a bit curmudgeonly about the whole thing, though I'm not sure why. (I'm not a joiner-inner and I'm not really interested in socialising with the other parents tbh). So other opinions on this would be welcome.

Callisto I didn't think you were especially rude - but it sounds as tho the other mum may have taken your reply as a bit off.

But I think you are doing what Custy says, ie making a job out of being different - when you say you "struggle with all the bullshit that greases the social wheels" - ah yes, by calling it bullshit you rise above it and then you don't have to do it.

Fair enough - but then you leave yr DD without a social life at school.

In reception it is easy sometimes to hold on tight to other friends etc; but you and yr DD I suspect will come to realise that these school friends are the ones you will see in years to come. My DS2 used to name his best nursery buddy as his best mate, and still at almost 7 we do see him - but less than we did, logistically it is just harder.

FWIW I certainly have let my DC go round to the house of a parent I barely know - and I have invited DC of unknown parents here. The kids are friends at school; that's good enough for me. None of us are axe murderers, the chances are. Am I hopelessly blase/naive??? Sometimes you just have to make a leap of faith. I hardly think it's the greatest risk is it?

Have you actually asked your daughter if she wants to go yet? If she does i cant really see what the problem is let her go. I have always been really pleased when my son is invited for tea and they can tell i am but i always say Thankyou i will ask him !