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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

make up for kids

65 replies

knickerelasticjones · 28/02/2010 19:56

DDs birthday recently - and she was given TWO make-up kits. She's 5.

Seriously.

I'm horrified (and the kits are in the bin - sorry people who gave them to her, generosity appreciated etc. but no way is she having them)

AIBU?

OP posts:

dayday · 28/02/2010 22:39

my DD is only 5 and is obsessed with make up and the mirror. it was a bit of fun at first but now she constantly applies her lipstick and mascara.
But since watching 'Jo Frost' dealing with an image concious 12 year old ive thrown all the make up away. She also thinks shes fat.

Ive got three other kids and told them all to constantly praise her and tell she looks beautiful.

Its weird really because her other two older sisters arent like that at all!

Nellykats · 28/02/2010 22:41

It's wrong to encourage little girls to wear make up, only reinforces the idea that women need work done to look good. The way make-up works is by emphasizing youth, the cheeks and the lips made to look more red, the lashes longer etc. So a child with make-up is ridiculous. It's fine as a game, but I find it revolting as a gift. Girls shoudl be allowed to remain that, not turn into little women too early.

Give them back and explain you don't agree, to avoid future embarassement

pigletmania · 28/02/2010 22:42

YABabitU imo, children learn from role playing and dressing up and putting make up on is a part of play as long as its done sensibly. I would let dd wear make up at home but not out in public. Its like face paints, would you ban them too

pigletmania · 28/02/2010 22:45

Of course if it got out of hand and my dd was displaying worrying behaviour like those of dayday, then yes in the bin it would go. But if my dd treated it as a bit of fun and part of dressing up then yes fine, but if it got to an obsession.

MrsChemist · 28/02/2010 23:03

YABa little bitU. I had play make-up as a child. At the time I just wanted to put on make-up like mummy, and she didn't want me ruining her expensive make-up. So I got cheap dress up make-up and everyone was happy.

Although no mascara. I distinctly remember my mum telling me that I wasn't allowed mascara because it stung when you put it on. No bloody idea where she came up with that one.

Nowadays I never really wear much make-up, and couldn't care less how I look, so I haven't been affected by my experiences with Tinkerbell eyeshadow.

Ellokitty · 28/02/2010 23:30

Get her a Girls World.

I don't like my DDs to dress themselves up in make up, but they have a girls world that they can tart up to their hearts content. Then I wipe it all off with a wet wipe. Simples, they get to play and explore, just not on their faces!

Minshu · 28/02/2010 23:43

I'm surprised that the reaction to this is so negative. I have bought a child's make up set for a 5 or 6 yo before, but checked with the parents first. I don't think I'll have an issue with my DD (now 5 mo) using make up in dressing up games in the house when she's older. The girlsworld sounds like a good compromise.

Adam Ant was a great influence on me and my brother for a little while when we were kids. Mum wasn't always too pleased with the results, I seem to remember

piscesmoon · 01/03/2010 07:07

Children have lovely skin and they have their whole life in front of them for makeup-why would you want to start so early? It also takes away the fun of first experimentation as a teenager if you have already done it. Some things should be saved for later-too much too early isn't usually a good thing.

MrsWobbleTheWaitress · 01/03/2010 08:31

YABU

It's just like dressing up. My girls love putting make up on and it looks completely crap They go through a few phases of doing it several times a day, just like they go through a few phases of dressing up several times a day, and then they forget about it and go onto another game. It's not real make-up - it's just playing.

And YABTU to throw away one of their presents. How would you like it if your DP threw away something you were given because you disapproved of it?

aluvss · 01/03/2010 08:32

I also hate seeing little girls with makeup and nail polish on, its good that some school in my area have banned girls from wearing makeup and nail polish in primary and secondary school.

I hate makeup myself so my daughter isnt really into it but she does like to dress up as a princess. I think there is a difference between role play and wearing makeup.

worldgonemad72 · 01/03/2010 08:40

I think its ok for dressing up games at home, id rather my dd use kids stuff than my proper makeup tbh.
I definately wouldn't let her wear any out though (she's 8 now)

thisxgirl · 01/03/2010 09:05

I think YANBU - make-up has a different purpose from face paints.

Make-up isn't designed or marketed simply for fun and experimentation with different looks - it is there for women to use to enhance their features/make them 'prettier', whether or not the ultimate aim of that is titillation or to compete with other women or to simply 'feel better' when they look in the mirror. Women are thus made to feel 'naked' or 'plain' or less attractive in their natural state and are compelled to spend huge amounts of money and time on these products and processes.

The message is that you are not quite good enough without enhancement - and that is potentially a very dangerous message to project on young girls.

fernie3 · 01/03/2010 10:04

My daughter loves little glittery makeup kits!. She and her brother have loads of fun pretending to be mummies and daddies (my son wears makeup too so we have a slightly unusual looking daddies!). I dont see it as being a sexual thing at all, how can a 5 year old girl and three year old boy with pink glitter lipstick across most of their cheeks be anything but two little children playing at being grown up. I wouldn't buy them a full adult makeup kit but a little bit of glitter lipstick? YABU.

Original poster

knickerelasticjones · 01/03/2010 15:59

Thanks for your many replies.

I'm quite surprised actually that so many of you think I'm being unreasonable, but then I did ask so I just have to accept that many of you disagree with me!

I'm quite though, by a couple of posters who have decided to pass comment on my personality based on my views on make up (I'm uptight, have too much time on my hands and am controlling what my daughter thinks and does apparently......)

but thanks all the same, it's been very interesting to read everything.

OP posts:

ButterPie · 01/03/2010 16:15

I would do the same as you, I am constantly having to edit my DD1s presents. She has dolls, a tiara, etc, but I find the tide of pink sparkly tat a little disturbing.

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