to think that a 3 year old doesn't really need a DS. ..

[choufleur]

and if you're going to buy your 3 year old one then you shouldn't allow them to take it to nursery so that other 3 years olds (my ds) then go on and on about wanting one.

my 3 yo ds has one to help with "patch" time. has really helped his eye. was recommended by top eye doctor!
btw it is working.. we also use lacing cards, stickers, etc. so really part of an range of tools to help.

exactly soupdragon

all say at school enough already
let's do something else at home

day

"let's do something else at home "

They do a lot of reading at school too. Best they do none of that at home either.

I think my feeling is that they shouldn't actually need a console for a journey. We have done plenty of very long train journeys with our two, without consoles.

Hospital may be a different thing, sure - but you only need one then - not multiple ones!

YANBU, my 2.11 dd has taken a liking to my ds, no way is she getting her hands on it. So i have to walk my Nintendogs when she is asleep or out of view. To take them into nursery, no way, they are there to lean to play computer games.

I want to broaden my children's perspective not narrow it down to a screen. Of any size.

Of course a 3 year old does not need a DS, but then neither does an adult, or a teenager or anyone else. Just like we don't need Mumsnet, Wiis, televisions or any other form of entertainment. Nothing is essential.

That said, my three year old DD has got a DS, but it becomes a different scenario when they are the younger child. My youngest has to do a lot of waiting around for her eldest sister to do things - swimming lessons, ballet lessons and so on. Usually these places do not have a lot of space for a three year old to run around and let off steam, so you have to entertain them for the 40 min lesson or whatever, quietly so they do not annoy the other parents and children. I have a bag of toys - colouring in, sticker books and so on to entertain her. And in that bag is a DS. I find it a useful tool for entertaining a child when they cannot run around and make noise. Believe me, if you have to do this on a regular basis you too would probably see it as a godsend. I also allow the DDs to play them on long journeys in the car, or usually any situation where they are required to sit quietly for a long period of time.

However, they do not generally play with them in the house at home. Not because they are banned, but because they are in their activities bags and so usually, they don't think to get them out. As such, they can be very useful and I'd have to ask what is the harm in that? Furthermore, my DD has got simple counting games and letter recognition games on her DS, and so they can be educational too.

However, I do not think it is appropriate for any child to take them into nursery. Not because of peer pressure (if you want to say no, that's your responsibility nothing to do with me - just like it is my responsibility to tell my children they're not to eat sweets even though their friends are). No, I think they are inappropriate in nurseries because they are expensive and really need an adult to oversee them and make sure they are used properly. As the parent, I accept that job with my DDS and their Nintendos, but I don't hink it is fair to put that level of responsibility onto someone else. Children should only be allowed to take them off when they are able to take full responsibility for them themselves. That's why I wouldn't let my 6 year old daughter take hers off anywhere either.

My eldest is 6 and I'm totally aware that many of his classmates have their own game consoles. My personal choice is to limit him to a few games on DH's Ipod at the weekends. We're still holdiing out against the DS, Wii, playstations etc but I'm fairly sure that we're in the minority. (BTW, DH is a gamer and I'm a former IT professional and in our minds, it's a slippery slope - once you give in, there is no going back!)

My 3 yr old has a 2nd hand DS. She plays it in small doses and it has really helped improve her concentration/attention span.

Games can be/are educational - as much as puzzles, stories etc. Moderate their playing and they would be fine.

Nursery is not an appropriate place for one but dont judge other parents for this.

I agree you shouldn't allow them to take it to nursery (for one it'll get broken!) I have a DS and have recently bought my ds1 (3.5yrs) the peppa pig game for it, great game he plays it 2 or 3 times a week and only when ds2 and ds3 are napping, I think its like with anything small amounts of it are good along with a wide range of other toys, books and activities - everyone has their take on it, it won't be the last thing you are pestered over and imo 3yr olds have a different thing they want every week - this week ds1 asked for a fish because they have them at nursery and we don't have pets at home... he doesn't think thats fair either....

janeite , I bought them for an 8.5 hour flight to Antigua and I suspect they saved several lives We had no end of fun sending each other messages which wouldn't have worked or been so entertaining if we spoke. Also, I let DS2 kill me regularly when we played Lego Indiana Jones together (on separate consoles) when he was in hospital. One each, whilst obviously not essential, is as useful as having more than one controller for the Wii.

McBitchy , my children's perspective isn't narrowed to the dimensions of a screen What an odd thing to say.

i just don't want mine

screens are fine but they spend enough time in school on them as you say...

a bloke in a shop said those words to me dp soup dragon - said he used to work in graphic design but found the majority of his life day was looking at a 12" screen. now he climbs trees

soupdragon - you may find my views 'odd' you are entitled to your opinion

I am entitled to mine

My DS got one when he was that age and loved it. I am not a believer of video games are bad! Both my husband and I are avid gamers and it never did us any harm. But OMG you are so right about not flaunting it in front of other kids. It should be more of a weekend treat, or when there's something really good on tv that you need peace to watch

Well, there's two issues. Firstly, YABU for thinking that one child shouldn't show another their toy because they aren't allowed it. Children will always have things others don't. Although personally, I wouldn't let my children take a DS into nursery because it would cause too much trauma if lost or broken AND because it would distract them from nursery activities.

Secondly, YANBU that a 3 year old doesn't 'need' a DS. No, they don't need a DS, but they won't do them any harm and in fact, I think they can be quite beneficial.

DH and I are both gamers and work/have worked in IT. Our DCs have been into computers, consoles etc. since they could hold the controllers. They're bright kids with a fascination with the world around them.

I personally find playing games far more intellectually stimulating than watching movies, for example. I'm convinced playing games drove my 6yo learn to read so she could see what the animals were saying on Animal Crossing.

How silly to think playing a game of any sort could 'narrow' one's perspective rather than add another element to it.

To those who say screens narrow the perspective of a child's imagination, let me tell you a story.

I heard my mildly autistic 6 year old and his 3 year old brother racing around upstairs, brumming and shouting a few weeks ago. Upon further investigation, I found little piles of lego patterned around the landing, the bathroom and their bedroom, and the children running around a set 'course' gathering them, shouting

"boodley-boodley-BING! Power-up! I'm really big now!"

"boodley-boodly-BING! Well, I just POW-ED you!"

They were playing Mariocart. They were playing Mariocart. And it is the first time I have ever seen my 6 year old lose himself in an imaginative game.

Narrows perspectives, my arse.

I am starting to get very twitchy about this issue

I think that screens are really fecking with children's minds

I reckon teenage mental health problems are going to rocket because of this - because teenagers don't know how to occupy their minds in a normal way

I think we are fooling ourselves

I think we will find that screen-time has an effect on serotonin production

I would put money on it if I was a betting woman

Morning Paper - hell yes.

My 3yo doesn't know what a DS is. As far as I'm concerned he can stick to toys, digging in the mud and cbeebies, which he watches a bit too much of so I'm not adding console games to the mix, can't afford it anyway. I have a Playstation 1 in the loft and he's not going to know anything about that for a long time.

.

morningpaper I think I'm kind of with you on this one - not entirely re the details, but I am at the 'it keeps them quiet on long journeys' school of thought. If people were aware there was a risk that computer games (and TV for that matter) affect brain development and brain chemistry negatively would they still use DSs and the like as pacifiers?

there's a really interesting book, not all of it I buy into but it gathers a lot of research into the effect of TV, computer (and also TV advertising)on young brains.

set free childhood

I got it from the library after observing how TV affected my DD (watching her watch it was freaky and wierd) and it was well worth a read - has helped me decide how to manage her TV and computer use without banning them altogether.

I'd like to see the evidence for these 'theories.'

There's a lot of research to show the positive effects of games. A University of Rochester, US study showed that children were shown a selection of boxes on a screen. Those who gamed regularly could count them more quickly and accurately than others.

They have also been positively linked to problem solving ability in studies.

Anecdotally, I've been pulled out of some moments of depression by a great game. My Bioshock is your Pride and Prejudice.

I think there are worrying trends, particularly among teenagers, and the skills they are losing are concentration, meaningful interaction, a more 'rounded' lifestyle including exercise/daylight, performing normal social interaction which feeds back to increase social confidence...

MANY people with mental health problems can be managed very well with basic things such as exercise/fresh air and eating properly - things that are also (perhaps) part of a normal social network, that is not replicated on-screen in any meaningful way.

Still waiting for the evidence. People have said the same things about punk rock, video nasties, dungeons and dragons etc. etc.

Games have been around long enough now that research has been undertaken.

No-one is advocating spending days in front of the television or computer game, and I wouldn't advocate spending hours and hours just reading or playing monopoly either.

But this all just, "I have a feeling" stuff that buys into the "I don't understand it/it didn't happen in my day so it must be bad" philosophy.

There are some positive trends in teenagers. I could argue that they are faster learners, talented networkers and great at researching subjects quickly and thoroughly, all thanks to new information technologies. They're also more internationally aware.

I'd also question your 'meaningful interaction' - why is Facebook, Club Penguin (or Mumsnet) not meaningful, for example?