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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

MN Jury - am I being unreasonable or is DH?

89 replies

Lovecat · 25/02/2010 23:37

So I am doing menu planning in an attempt to cut down on the ridiculous amount of food bought and wasted in our house, and everything I now have in the fridge is purchased with a meal in mind.

There are also snacky things like cheese, ham, yoghurts, fruit etc.

Came in from swimming last night, wanted a quick tea for all as I had a rehearsal to go to afterwards, had planned quiche and salad.

Go to fridge, remove box containing quiche, feels light... open it up, find that all but an eighth of it has been eaten.

"Oh" says DH, "I got hungry last night, I didn't know it was for anything in particular"

I remonstrate that of course it was for a feckin' meal, since when do I buy quiche for him to snack on?

He replies that I didn't specifically tell him that it wasn't to be eaten, therefore he's within his rights to help himself.

I feel
a) I'm not his mother, why the hell should I have to inform him in minute detail of what he can and can't eat?
b) Neither are we students in a shared house, I should not have to label the food!
c) Why can't he eat 3 meals a day instead of saving himself for just once a day and then raid the fridge and cupboards for whatever he can cram down his mouth that evening? It's not like I'm not buying him things to snack on, but he always goes for the other stuff!

OP posts:

Krugerellie · 26/02/2010 11:37

I think YAB a bit U if he didn't know your plans. I have started menu planning as like others fed up with throwing out food. DD has an obsession with sell by dates! I am quite happy to use stuff well past its best, but there are limits. I went away at half term with DD, and DH said on the phone "Thanks for taking all the food out of the fridge with you". All I had done was throw out the mouldy stuff before going away! My DH likes to snack on marmalade sandwiches, which is fine as I don't like marmalade and don't eat bread. Never send him shopping as he spends all his time on the phone seeking clarification of my list. And comes back with giant packs of McCoys!

neversaydie · 26/02/2010 11:37

At least he can't complain in future that he doesn't like quiche!

2old4thislark · 26/02/2010 11:46

YANBU

What he did think the quiche was for, if not a meal? Who snacks on quiche?

There's very little to snack on in my house as my husbnad can be a greedy pig. (Eldest and a largest of a family of four kids - enough food for them all but you had to be quick!).

I used to get peed off with him eating the lunch box treats. Plenty of fruit or bread etc if he needs a snack, and yoghurts.

Original poster

Lovecat · 26/02/2010 14:28

Hmm... it seems pretty equally divided between BU and NBU (the quiche debate is another matter entirely - of COURSE we eat it warm, Bonsoir, is there any other way? )

Anyway, I'm off to Morrisons today and will put the list on the fridge when I get home.

Although, as he rang me from Paris at 3 this morning to tell me how drunk he was and therefore I shouldn't expect anything of him when he gets home tonight, I may well staple it to his forehead instead when I see him....

OP posts:

stealthsquiggle · 26/02/2010 14:47

Lovecat - I would go with the stapling. What kind of drunk is he that he calls to make excuses for the following day, FGS? My DH calls me when he is drunk - to tell me repeatedly how much he loves me and to get stroppy when I don't actually particularly want to talk to him for hours on end when (a) it is 3am and I was asleep and (b) he won't remember the conversation in the morning. If he rang to tell me how useless he was going to be when he got home he really would get short shrift.

stealthsquiggle · 26/02/2010 14:48

(above post meant to be lighthearted, BTW - I missed off the )

Joolyjoolyjoo · 26/02/2010 14:54

Phew- he can't be my DH then, as he was definitely here and not in Paris! Although maybe he's just telling you he's in Paris, while working his way through the contents of my fridge

Morloth · 26/02/2010 15:00

All food in our house is there for the eating. The only "rule" is that if you want it outside of meal times you get it yourself.

If there is something I need for a specific recipe/meal I will tell them so they can leave it alone.

Original poster

Lovecat · 26/02/2010 15:17

He does go away on 'business' quite a bit, JJJ... perhaps I should have posted this in Relationships!

OP posts:

crankytwanky · 26/02/2010 15:53

Hmmm, don't know. I'd be livid if I had earmarked an ingredient, which had then been quaffed. If he had time to eat 7/8ths of a quiche, he could have cooked you something else for you to re-heat.

Don't have this problem at mine much, as the only "snacky" food I buy, apart from crisps especially for DH (when I'm feeling nice), are mini scotch eggs left over from when DS &I picnic in the car. And they're fair game.

Incidentally, quiche is a picnic/buffet food imo. Not a supper fit for a February night!

SpringHeeledJack · 26/02/2010 19:30

quiche:tea

pork pie:snack

tell you what OP, mn is going soft- not long ago you'd have immediately got 20 posts calling him a "cocklodger" and telling you to divorce him

ChippingIn · 26/02/2010 19:37

SpringHeeledJack

Lovecat - stapling is too good for him after that phone call - does he have a nail gun??

crankytwanky · 26/02/2010 21:36

Does anyone else fancy a quiche now?

Surely a pork pie is a picnic food too? TBH, I can think of no gastronomic situation that would call for a pork pie.

MmeLindt · 26/02/2010 21:45

Quiche is a proper meal, served warm of course, with salad.

Eating most of a quiche that would feed a family as a snack is definitely unreasonable.

As is phoning you drunk at 3am. Even if he was in Paris.

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