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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wonder why lottery winners want publicity?

81 replies

BigMomma3 · 16/02/2010 11:23

Friday's Euromillions winners - names and photos all over the papers and news. Now everyone will know who they are and what they have. DCs schoolfriends will all know.

Just don't understand why they would want people to know. Opens up a whole can of worms wrt jealousy, people trying to get money out of them, potential kidnappings etc. Same with the woman who won 36 mill a few years ago. She said her DS would not move schools so why would she publicise the fact she now has loads of money and therefore create potential problems for her DS??

It would be wonderful to win but I think all the publicity about it will not create happiness for them in the long run. Why not keep it quiet - just don't get it. AIBU??

OP posts:
mii · 16/02/2010 13:20

LOL at getorf

I really don't get how you could keep the same friends without it being awkward.

Do you never talk to your friends about money trouble/a huge bill etc would you not feel guilty or like you had to pay it if that came up in conversation.

Or when you all go out for a meal, you would feel like you should pay the bill for everyone, that isn't keeping everything the same is it?

GetOrfMoiLand · 16/02/2010 13:35

BUY new friends rahaaahaaaar!

Joke.

I would very much like to set up a charity working with the elderly, and I think that with all those millions it would be insane to just spend the rest of your life living the high life.

So, my plan for when this is needed (huh), piss arse around living the life of riley for 3 years or so, rest of time doing something useful.

Actually, I would not want sop many millions really. It would be ok for me in my 30s, I have worked hardf and would appreciate the riches. However, what effect would this have on my teenager dd? Would she bother carrying on going to school and get her A levels etc with the thought of all those millions? It must be a atrange old life if you are a kid of the wealthy.

Clumsymum · 16/02/2010 13:43

"Or when you all go out for a meal, you would feel like you should pay the bill for everyone"

The REAL problem is that your MATES might feel like you should pay the bill for everyone, and that is what would wreck your relationships, if you told folk that you have won.

If you could just go along the "we're doing a bit better these days" route, you could treat your friends/family when you wanted to, without it being expected of you.

Getting back to this couple who have just won, they can now NEVER just pop into the local pub again, because lots of people (many they hardly knew, or didn't know at all) will expect them to buy drinks all round. And if they choose not to (because they just want to have a quiet drink together), they'll get muttered about, and branded 'mean'.

NO WAY would I have my face all over the news for winning a lot of money.

Oh, and while we're on the subject, squirting Veuve Cliquot all over the place is bloody vulgar, whether in front of the cameras or not.

LeQueen · 16/02/2010 14:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EdgarAllenSnow · 16/02/2010 18:13

you are talking about 56 million - even 1 or 2 million could easily vanish and just be 'doing a bit better' (lets see - our immediate family = 8 people (not including babies) - you're talking £120k apx each - not enough for a house apiece, or twice that and everyone can buy a house..they'd still need an income though...) -but 56 million is a very large sum indeed.

expatinscotland · 16/02/2010 18:28

I wouldn't buy flash cars. They just scream, 'CARJACK ME!'

Ditto flash jewellery.

Bobbiewickham · 16/02/2010 18:32

I reckon it would be a total stress to try and keep such a big win secret.

Plus, the press would do their best to find you.

And there would be the worry of family members/friends leaking your secret to the press - amazing how loyalty can disappear when a big cheque is waved.

And you only have to look at the John Terry debacle to see how the press can go to town when they feel they've been denied a big story.

Playing the game a good way to ensure kind press, imo.

shockers · 16/02/2010 18:33

I don't think I would even let on to DH until it had sunk in properly.

tartyhighheels · 16/02/2010 18:34

I know someone who won about 3 and a bit million - his children don't know about it and are now just teenagers. They bought a modest house in spain and a bigger house close to where they live in kent and have nice cars and lots of holidays but the kids don't have a clue - great idea I think. And yes, you do have a choice when you win whether to be identified, I cnanot imagine why anyone would want that kind of publicity.

compo · 16/02/2010 18:40

I watched their interview liveon news 24
the interviewer kept askign them if they had plans for the money, they said friends family etc etc, he had to ask them several times before he eventually said 'and good auses?'
only then did they say they would ehlp out local schools, fab idea. I was gettign a bit until they said that

senua · 16/02/2010 18:40

I heard an interview where the woman was saying that they wanted to give some of the money to their numerous relations (which is lovely of them). There's no way you could do that and still keep it secret. They probably thought that they should make sure that the publicity scrum was on their terms.

traceybath · 16/02/2010 18:41

I'm with expat - we could be wags together .

There was an interesting programme on r4 a few weeks ago about the people who take the calls from lottery winners. The funniest one was a man who was already so wealthy he didn't even bother picking up his chq for several weeks.

expatinscotland · 16/02/2010 18:49

I'd give Dubai a run for its money in the tacky sweepstakes, traceybath.

traceybath · 16/02/2010 18:51

Talking of Dubai - what has John Terry promised his wife to get her to agree to all those photos of her simpering at him??

MrsC2010 · 16/02/2010 18:51

I've often thought this sort of thing through, for these hefty amounts. (Ever hopeful!) But to be honest, I think £56M is just silly money, too much really.

I would tell f&f we'd won a little, enought to cover what we were making obvious if you see what I mean. Which would be:

  • A lump sum to my parents to have a chilled retirement with. They don't have a mortgage, but life can still be costly.
  • A house for my sister. Not flashy, just a reasonable first house.
  • Pay off any outstanding mortgages for Dh's family. I think they're all clear but you never know.
  • A house or portion of for my best friend who is desperate to come home and settle and have babies.
  • A trust fund or similar for my neices and nephews for when they reach a suitable age etc. Not life altering, but house deposit or whatever.
  • Figure out some way of paying a portion of the money to Cancer Research, some to Age Concern and some to Oxfam or similar. On a yearly basis, some hefty amount life the interest on the money etc.

Selfishly:

  • Pay off our mortgage/debts
  • Get new cars. (By new, I don't mean new new. Just respectable cars that suit our purpose.)
  • Move house, just a bigger house we never have to move out of!
  • Have a bigger family than we think we can afford right now. (Only pregnant with DC1 at the moment, so this is thinking right ahead!)
  • Buy a holiday home somewhere. Even in the UK.
  • Buy a rib or a small yacht we can pootle around in. Again, not huge, but we both love sailing and grew up around yachts and boats and would love our own.

That's it so far!

teamcullen · 16/02/2010 19:10

Expat Your back (I think youve been off MN- at least I havent seen you on here) How did your move go last autumn? I hope it worked out well for you and the family

Sorry for hyjacking

I wouldnt go for publicity either Or just get them to print, Teamcullen, MN member since July 09... Prefarably in the Daily Mail

chickbean · 16/02/2010 19:29

There's a good novel called "Rich deceiver" by Gillian White about a woman who wins the lottery but doesn't tell her husband - she basically gets someone to give him a great job to boost his self esteem, but then it all goes pear-shaped.

Morloth · 16/02/2010 19:32

expat I think you have to be orange to be a WAG, are you willing to go that far?

expatinscotland · 16/02/2010 19:53

'Expat Your back (I think youve been off MN- at least I havent seen you on here)'

Oh, I've been back for a few months now! Here everyday! I'll be away for 3 weeks in April, though, to go abroad. Move went okay. Place is a dump, though .

Morloth, that is so true! I can't really go orange because I take a very good tan. I'd be brown from the Spanish sunshine, though. I'd hire Rafael Nadal as my personal trainer, to work off all those tapas.

Rockbird · 17/02/2010 11:42

But there is no law that says you have to give to charity compo. Their money, their choice so not really fair of you to . Of course you hope that people will but it's not your place to judge what they do with their money. And wby should they tell you anyway?

Besides, they probably don't know their arses from their elbows at the moment.

MorrisZapp · 17/02/2010 12:37

I'll never forget watching a young couple on Location Location who were looking to upgrade to a 'lottery winners house' after having a big win.

They were clearly just doing it because they felt they had to, and in fact they obviously liked the house they were living in already.

The houses K&P showed them were awful, vulgar monstrosities and you could almost see them thinking 'oh god please don't make me live here'.

I think that most people, when it comes down to it, would like to live a slightly more comfortable and luxurious version of the life they already have, rather then changing their tastes and ideals entirely, just becuase they are 'rich'.

My ideal home would be just around the corner from my current flat. My ideal holidays would be in the same places I've always gone to, but I'd go first class and stay in better hotels - etc etc.

bunjies · 17/02/2010 13:13

I completely understand about the no-publicity thing but I do think if you are rich you have a responsibility to share the wealth, by employing people. If I won £££ I would definitely let it change my life and hopefully others around me. I would employ people (gardeners, chauffeurs etc) wherever I could and pay them a decent wage thus enabling them to support their own families. I agree with the statement that if you're not going to let it change your life why are you bothering in the first place?

HinnyPet · 17/02/2010 13:24

I know a couple who won and it totally changed their life for the worse, sadly.

He discovered she'd cheated on him previous to the win, so was snogging other girls and had a fling in front of her, it certainly hasn't made them happy, in fact I could say it affected her quite badly. They still live in the same house and he gives her an allowance but won't split the money with her as they are not married.

Clumsymum · 17/02/2010 16:11

"I know a couple who won and it totally changed their life for the worse, sadly.

He discovered she'd cheated on him previous to the win, so was snogging other girls and had a fling in front of her, it certainly hasn't made them happy, in fact I could say it affected her quite badly. They still live in the same house and he gives her an allowance but won't split the money with her as they are not married. "

Hmm, it wasn't the win that changed their lives for the worse tho' was it?
It was the infidelity.

MrsC2010 · 17/02/2010 16:17

I saw that one Morris, interesting watching. You could see that the guy was desperately trying to stay sensible and she just wanted to blow it all.

Phil just made me laugh, he was showing them hideous houses that you knew he hated because they were the "sort of houses lottery winners should live in".

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