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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

in getting annoyed with 'chuggers' at my door?

86 replies

MrsSnoops · 11/02/2010 17:55

This is he second time this has happened recently. Doorbell just went and it is a charity worker asking for donations. I know I am not going to give as I already donate to charity and am happy with what I give, so I politely but firmly say no thanks and he says 'do you not care about children?' WTF??
Firstly this is my house and if I don't want to talk to you I don't have to and secondly don't emotionally blackmail me in to giving money.
Does anyone else get annoyed by this? I am actually getting really fed up with it.
I'm being miserable aren't I?

OP posts:
mrsvwoolf · 11/02/2010 22:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

webwiz · 11/02/2010 22:25

Apparently all my neighbours thought it was a great idea to donate the price of a weekly cup of coffee to the charity and wouldn't I like to be like them. Er no go away.

MIFLAW · 11/02/2010 23:18

A chugger stopped me on Brixton High Street the other week. I SWEAR the only reason I stopped was because he looked like a rough sleeper and I was going to ask him if he thought perhaps AA might be able to help him. (He also had his hand crossed over his heart, "coincidentally" covering the Friends of the Earth logo.)

When I said bluntly that I wasn't interested, he came out with some shit about "don't you care about the planet?" I think Richard and Judy were his scriptwriters.

"Are you a friend of the earth?" I enquired.

He fell for it. "Yes."

"Well talk to the fucking earth then, because I'm busy."

1-0 to MIFLAW.

expatinscotland · 11/02/2010 23:32

Well, I usually get away with telling them I'm only here on 'vacation' because I have an American accent.

But every now and again I'll wind one up for fun and to waste their time .

If they come to the door I usually tell them I'm an escort girl so I don't have a bank account as I only deal in cash.

With a totally straight face.

Or that I need the money for drugs and that I'm new in town, if they know any place I can score?

expatinscotland · 11/02/2010 23:36

DH is such a mug! He lets these people start in on him. He even let some JW's start talking when they came to teh door of the last place we lived.

I told them we were converts to Islam and they scarpered. I said, 'Inshallah' as they lived and then we pissed ourselves laughing for about half an hour after that.

duffpancake · 11/02/2010 23:40

OP he doesn't care about the children either, he is doing it for the cash. I used to have to go through a real rat run of these folks between the tube and work every day and I started to notice that although the charities changed every week, the people remained the same. So either they were all just immensely caring people whose empathy extended to children and animals and cancer sufferers and fair trade and the environment...

...or they got a cut of the cash they raised.

expatinscotland · 11/02/2010 23:42

Why let these people guilt you?

When they say 'Don't you care about children/pandas/the planet?' just say NO, no I don't give a flying fuck about anything but the little voice inside my head.

RedbinDippers · 11/02/2010 23:45

YANBU, Fuck off might be rude but it is very effective.

AvrilHeytch · 11/02/2010 23:54

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Trickle · 12/02/2010 00:01

expat - DH has found the perfect way to scare off JW's, Mormons and the new breed of door knocking evangelicals we seem to have round here. He just informs them I'm a quaker and they can't get away fast enough I'm a bit about this - but ho hum gets the door closed faster.

duffpancake · 12/02/2010 00:01

Yes but it is a job for them Avril. And at the risk of getting all playground, I would say that saying things like "Don't you care about the children?" they started it.

duffpancake · 12/02/2010 00:03

Apart from anything, I can't believe in the history of chugging, this approach has ever worked. Do you suppose anyone, ever, has stopped in their tracks and said, "The children! Silly me, I was being so heartless! I'll just get my chequebook out."

Mmmcoffee · 12/02/2010 00:17

I got a phone call from St Johns Ambulance last week, we give £20 a year by direct debit, not a lot but we have a budget and we stick to it. Anyway the guy said thanks for supporting them, wittered on a bit about some extra stuff they want to do this year, and then asked if I would be willing to increase my direct debit a bit. I sort of hummed and haahed, trying to think of a nice way of saying 'No', and he carried straight on and said "We would like to suggest a payment of £120 per year".

Yes, and I'll just forget the mortgage payment that month.

JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns · 12/02/2010 00:25

YANBU

i dont answer my door to people i dont know anymore!

I always get caught by the ones in town i think they target mums thinking we are soft, After a few years of being polite, save the children approached me yesterday, 'would you like to save the children' My reply, 'you can these pair theyre doing my head in'

Funnily enough he didnt respond and i wandered on quite happily!

LazyJourno · 12/02/2010 00:35

I like to say when they're trying to sign me up to a children's charity:

"Sorry, I'm already sponsoring a child"

I just don't add that it's the one in the buggy I'm pushing...

Vallhala · 12/02/2010 00:41

A friend of mine is the daughter of a vicar. She once told me that when one day the JWs called at her father's door he asked them, "Am I not right in thinking that you believe that come the end of the world there will only be room in Heaven for 40 thousand?"

"Yes", the JWs replied, seeming pleased that ttheir subject knew their faith.

""Well, why on earth are you trying to limit yyour own chances by attempting to convert me then?"

They never came back.

deaddei · 12/02/2010 07:34

My dad used to tell Jehovahs Witnesses he was a blood donor...that got rid of them!
I work for a charity and HATE chuggers- I too seem to attract them when out and about.

nikki1978 · 12/02/2010 07:41

I had a man approach me a couple of evenings ago as I was getting out of my car on the drive. He showed me a card saying he was deaf and had no job and was selling his art to make money. I said I had no money on me sorry so he shoved his portfolio thing towards me so I had to say no more firmly. He looked pissed off and tutted then left.

The sad thing is due to so many dodgy people around nowadays my instant thought was he is probably not even deaf.....

catwalker · 12/02/2010 08:34

It's quite simple, just say you only give direct to charities. If you sign up with them, they will be taking commission.

As I get older, I'm getting quite skilled at saying 'no' and resisting the urge to follow it up with an explanation or justification. You don't have to. "No", or "No thank you" is enough. Chuggers are trained in how to manipulate people. The more you say, the more material you are giving them to work with.

I never ever give to people who are in my face. I will always put money in the tin of someone who is standing quietly - never the loon who rattles their tin in my face.

LittleAngelicRose · 12/02/2010 08:49

I've got a peep hole on my door so I can check who's there before opening it.

I don't get many people coming to the door but I do get accosted on the street, when I just say 'no thank you' and walk away. On the doorstep I simply do the same and close the door. If they then persist, and they haven't yet, then it is time to call the police.

minxofmancunia · 12/02/2010 09:00

YANBU, since moving and now I'm on Mat leave I get them every single day. We lived on a v busy road before and never got them. Now we live on a quiet avenue away from the main drag they call all the time. Creeps me out a bit tbh as I feel a bit isolated when they won't go away.

We get people called "hawkers" they are offenders who've just been released on licence and usually have a bag of stuff they are trying to sell. It's some sort of scheme apparenbtly, they have a laminate explaining who they are and what the scheme is but I am a bit nervous of them. I also feel a bit sorry for them when i say no thank you and close the door. One time though I closed the door and he stood in the front garden for ages.

Feel even more vulnerable as I'm usually holding ds (4.5 months) when I open the door. The Police have stuck a flyer through recently about increased incidence of bogus callers in the area so I don't open up now before cecking their identity, postman, workmen and window cleaners only now!

bellissima · 12/02/2010 09:07

If its a decent charity I offer a cash donation. When they inevitably demand direct grabbit details instead I tell them that I'm in financial trouble and my bank won't let me set up any more.

Either that or I tell them I never give out my bank details on the doorstep (true! - same holds for utilities switchers). In London I resorted to a notice saying as much.

Morloth · 12/02/2010 09:42

That would be fine Avril if "No thanks" actually worked. IME it doesn't and they are quite aggressive, does them good for some people to be aggressive right back, maybe they will have a think before harassing people next time.

AvrilHeytch · 12/02/2010 09:45

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Morloth · 12/02/2010 09:48

Not in the minority in SW London.

They appear to think that as a heavily pregnant woman with a small child along I am a prime target (funny how DH is never approached). They are wrong. They will literally follow you along the street and trying to step in front of you, one guy even tried to grab DS's hand in an effort to get me to stop.

Not a fucking chance, I am being polite at that stage.