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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not change the sheets

83 replies

chandellina · 10/02/2010 12:19

My MIL is coming to stay tonight and has already advised me that she is bringing a sheet and pillowcases so that I won't have to change the duvet after she leaves! I assured her it was no problem, but now that I think about it, the last person to stay was SIL (her daughter) and SIL will be staying again in a week.

Since I wouldn't mind sleeping on my mother's sheets and vice versa, AIBU to leave them in place?

Or should I just get her bloody son to take care of things and change the sheets twice? ;)

OP posts:
emsyj · 10/02/2010 13:20

I like my sheets to smell of washing powder, so I would always give a guest clean sheets. The only exception for me has been when my sister stayed with me for 2 nights, separated by another night when she went to visit a friend (so she came, stayed, went, stayed away one night then came back and stayed another night). I didn't change the sheets in between.

I went to visit a very heavily pregnant friend this weekend and took my own towels and linen with me to save her washing. Have I committed a major faux pas and suggested to her that her hygeine levels are unsatisfactory????

preggersplayspop · 10/02/2010 13:21

I stayed at a friend of my DHs once and they hadn't changed the sheets, and it was really obvious they hadn't. Bleeuurrgghh, still makes me want to vom thinking about it. I change after each visit even if they have only been for one night. Poo particles, leg hairs, skin flakes urgggh.

I love my mum but I haven't lived at home for a long time and I wouldn't want to use her second hand sheets -I could only do this with my DH or children's bedding.

When I had just given birth my sister offered to bring her duvet so I didn't have to change everything, which I thought was really sweet. So maybe she is just being nice.

PlumBumMum · 10/02/2010 13:35

Can we please stop refering to pooparticles and bottom crumbs, its lunch time

If they changed the colour of the confused emoticon to green it could be a [vom] as reality puts it or a [boak] face

GrumpyOldHorsewoman · 10/02/2010 13:42

Hmmm. I'm definitely on the side of fresh sheets for each guest because I'd hate to think I was sleeping in someone else's bedding. If it is close family, I wouldn't mind, but I always change for different guests and usually prefer to leave the bed stripped in between to rid the possible fustiness (and because I like a nice clean smell on the sheets). DH and I stayed at BILs house for a few nights once and we definitely had unwashed sheets on bed (in generally skanky room, too). Not an impression I would like my houseguests to leave with. I do think it's slightly odd for guests to bring their own linen - pillows, perhaps because we all like a particular type of pillow, but sheets/duvets? I think not.

DorkTurnspit · 10/02/2010 13:44

My inlaws always bring their own bedding. I thought it is very kind of them, they have seem my enormous laundry pile after all. I had assumed it was not becauae they thought I was too hopeless to do it for them. Now I am not so sure

RockbirdandHerSpork · 10/02/2010 13:44

Has anyone said poolet yet?

I would imagine MIL is only bringing her own stuff to save on the washing. If she was coming straight after the SIL then I can see your reasoning but as there has been a gap I'd say go mad and change them.

DorkTurnspit · 10/02/2010 13:46

OMG what is a poolet

Feelingsensitive · 10/02/2010 14:00

Poo crumbs!

Another MN enlightment for me.

Am rolling about laughing at that one.

RockbirdandHerSpork · 10/02/2010 14:26

About halfway down the page

DorkTurnspit · 10/02/2010 14:32

I couldn't find it, but oh my eyes what a thread ! I think I might be sick.

lilylu22 · 10/02/2010 17:35

How ridiculous!!! Her daughter is the only other person who has been in them - FOR ONE NIGHT!!!!!

LeQueen · 10/02/2010 17:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StealthPolarBear · 10/02/2010 17:43

Keep looking at DD who sleeps with me and wondering if i'll ever feel this way about her won't miss lying in the milky drool mind

agedknees · 10/02/2010 17:44

What about anal dropout???

LeQueen · 10/02/2010 17:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

clam · 10/02/2010 17:51

Poo crumbs!!!!!????
What??? Don't any of you people wear nightclothes? Or undertake adequate personal hygiene in the loo? Or shower/bathe daily?

I feel quite ill.

MummyDoIt · 10/02/2010 17:52

I stayed at BIL's last Christmas. I knew they'd had visitors for two nights in a row before me so I offered to take a sleeping bag or clean sheets as I thought they might be overloaded with laundry. They said no need. When it came to bedtime, I discovered I had to sleep in niece's bed which MIL had slept in the previous night and SIL the night before that and that the sheets hadn't been changed at all. So THREE different people had used those sheets before me. I was not best pleased!

MummyDoIt · 10/02/2010 17:54

Oh yes, and I remember staying at my sister's years ago when my niece was young. I was given her bed to sleep in, she had a bed-wetting problem, and the duvet was rank. Either the cover hadn't been changed or the urine had soaked through the cover onto the duvet but it stank of stale wee. I ended up sprinkling perfume on it to try and mask the smell (it didn't!).

Stinkermink · 10/02/2010 18:05

My mums best friend (since departed this world) very sweet in every way, never changed sheets in between guests. It used to make me feel icky as a child and makes me shiver as an adult!

This is making me feel sick but I have to tell you....my uncle stayed at my parents one night and left behind a used (very, very used) complete with green crusty bogies on, cotton hanky UNDER THE PILLOW!!

Imagine if he had remembered it, retrieved it in the morning, then my mum had let the next guest sleep on that bedding......boak....

RoseWater · 10/02/2010 18:12

LeQueens post is all you need to know - although can't resist the opportunity to say poo crumbs

LeQueen · 10/02/2010 20:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BessieBoots · 10/02/2010 20:53

Well is your sister-in-law the type to deposit cack crumbs on her bedsheets?

(Sorry. Couldn't resist it.)

By the way, I wouldn't mind sleeping on sheets any close family member had slept in for one night before me. Except perhaps my brother, but he's nineteen, so the pillow would be all hair gel and the sheets all fake tan...

ninah · 10/02/2010 20:57

put your mils sheets and cases on OVER the existing sil stuff, then rip it off again afterwards
bingo

Species8472 · 10/02/2010 21:12

When my SIL stayed with us a few months ago (very soon after the birth of our DD), she told us not to bother changing the duvet cover as the last person using it had been her mum, my MIL. Her actual words were "it's OK, I'm sure mum didn't poo the bed" !

mummytowillow · 10/02/2010 22:26

Ewwwwwww .... change the sheets, I'd never let anyone sleep in a bed that hadn't got fresh sheets on it!

I once stayed at my now ex SIL's when we went on her hen night, I was sleeping on the settee and she threw this quilt come blanket to me and it was rotten, but what else was I supposed to do, I had to use it?

Her MIL was sleeping in the double bed used by her son and DIL to be, SIL decided she was too tired to change the sheets so MIL and FIL slept in a bed that they had been shagging in! Disgusting