I know I'm not!! little brat at ds's school scaring him witless...

[queenoftheslatterns]

dh joins the RAF on Wednesday, he will be doing an admin job but still has to go away for a while to do his basic training, then trade training. he was supposed to go on the 20th Jan but it was put back.

we have been talking to ds about it and the fact that daddy wont be around as much, but he has a new job and its very exciting, we took him to the RAF museum a few times and he was very excited that his daddy would be "driving aeroplanes" (we let that one slide) and is (rightfully) very proud of his daddy's new job.

the other night he woke up screaming, we went in and he was sobbing that he didnt want daddy to go to war, get shot and die. after calming him down I gleaned that a child at his school told him (after ds was saying that his daddy was going to RAF) that in the airforce and army you go to a far away place, get shot and die, so you dont have a daddy anymore or ever again. I am fuming. of course there are risks but a 4.5 year old doesnt need to know that!

OH, forgot to add, most schools (that I know of) have access to child psychologists, they were brought in to our school when DS2's classmate lost his dad, when DS1's best friend's mum died, and also a few years ago when a much loved girl that was in the year above my DD died of leukaemia. It helped the children to process their feelings and upset over these issues. Maybe the school could give your son some time with this?

I think OP is BU for saying the 'little brat' about the boy who upset her DS. However it must of been awlful for OP to see her DS in so upset.

In this current news climate the war and soilders getting killed is all over the news/papers. It is no surprise that the "brat" that upset OP's Ds said these things. It doesn't matter that they are 4 , they do see the world in black and white and pick up on far more than we all realise, it is everywhere atm.

In a situation like the OP has, it is very destressing, however there are risks that could happen to her DS's father and I think it needs to be explained to OP's DS. After all, it is a decision made by the adults in DS's life that could affect him in one way or another, as has happened at school already.