to ask a question and not be flamed about the victims

[pissinmy2shoes]

I can't imagine I could do it on the thread in the news topic, so will try here.

I have read the thread about the boys who nearly killed 2 others(or was it 3) and have a question....
will the victims get support. or will their poor parents have to fight like mad fo everything?

the victims?

as in the boys that were attacked?

because IMO the boys that have been locked away for these crimes, are victims too.

All support will have to be begged for, just like everything else in this country.

The kids who did the attacking will be looked after for the rest of their life. The victims....well,they did not die.
Really sad situation in this country.
IMO, the parents of the evil kids should be put in prison!

If you suspect you might be flamed and don't want to be, perhaps AIBU? is not the right place to ask your question.

They'll all get support of some sort.

I really hope so

I agree - you arent really asking 'Am I being unreasonable.....'
You are asking a specific question

So I would have started another thread in IntheNewsor elsewhere and asked the specific question

But yes they should get support - whether they will get enough is another matter

2shoes, is this you saying:

"I bet those two horrors will get x thousands spent on them in therapy and support etc while their poor victims get nothing. How is this fair?" ?

Because if it is, then say it.

I haven't heard anyone saying anything about the perpetrators being more deserving and worthy of support than the victims.

Only people saying that if we are a decent society then we must ensure that we attempt to rehabilitate those two boys.

No-one is saying that is more important than helping the victims. They are separate things.

what I am asking is if they will get support,
if you have ever tried to get anything of SS you will know you have to fight and fight for it, so will it be the case here, will they be left to fend for themselves?

isn't the talk of rehabilitation all a bit too soon though?

I agree that in time these boys should be rehabilitated, but by talking about their rehabilitation now there is a danger that what their victims went through will be lost in the outrage over how two children could do this/how their parents should be held accountable/how they are victims too.

this is why I wanted to start a seperate thread to ask about the victims, not the boys who did this, they have been talked about loads
do you think the victims will be able to put it behind them, if not where will the support come from?

I really hope the victims get as much help and support as they could possibly need to be able to go on and lead normal and happy lives. They should not have to fight for this.

That said, I also think the perpetrators need as much help towards rehabilitation and that it is our responsiblity as a forward-thinking society to provide that.

Why are the evil kids who did it 'victims'? They and their parents are the lowest of the low. It should never have happened.

but they will get help(I hope) as they will be in a place that is set up for that. the other lads won't be, it will be down to thier familys to fight for it, and it won't be easy

I think the only help they will get is emotional from thier families and god willing they will get over this.

I hope the victims don't have to fight for anything. In a way I hope the attackers get help so they don't damage anyone else, but if it were my boys who were attacked I'd wish nothing but hell for them TBH.

but surelt they will need intensive therapy

very good question 2 shoes, I would have hoped that they would be able to get some sort of psychological help from their local CAMHS, but obviously with shortages of services it's always easier said than done. I suspect the main help will be from their family and hope school is helpful.

Sexual assault, torture, near death, their lives are ruined

I imagine they will get help but children are resilliant. This was a horrific, horrific incident. But it was a one-off incident, they both survivied and they both saw the perpitrators be brought to justice, quite publically.

Sometimes the best help is to allow someone to get on with their lives without constant reminders of what happened.

Imo one of the best ways to do this would be for the media to stop going on about how the perpitrators were failed by everyone - their parents/social services/society.

yes something must have gone horribly horribly wrong for these boys to turn out the way they did, and perhaps they can be rehabilitated.

However, lots of children have tough lives, and the vast majority of them don't go out beating up the local kids.

I think that rehabilitation should happen quietly and behind the scenes, while public sympathy should be reserved for their victims.

TotalChaos that is what I thought, it takes so long to get any of these agencys(is that the word) to help, and I can imagine that this will really affect them when they hit thier teens, just when schools are no help at all.
wannabe I aggree that it would help if they were the victims iynwim

The victims will probably not get much support.

Two friends of mine were brutally attacked a some years ago. You can still see the scars on their faces. One scar is in fact going from ear to ear, from one of the perpetrators trying to cut open his throat. This was after his head was jumped on repeatedly. In addition to the usual kicking and punching.

They were just walking home to the flat they shared in east london, before midnight. They were not drunk.

They both moved, one moved out of London. Their relationships of both of them broke down under the strain, their friendships with eachotehr broke down as seeing eachother is reminding eachother of what they experienced together. They barely survived.

They were targeted for being gay. The police said there were little they could do, and they did not want to alienate the local minority community, or some shit.

I think these were older boys though.

that is so sad