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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed that cleaner gave my house key to her friend?

85 replies

MumNWLondon · 23/01/2010 18:51

I have had my cleaner for 6 years, and although she can be unreliable she is a very good efficient and good cleaner. Occasionally she had asked if her friend can come with so she can do the work in half the time, I have always said that was ok.

Over Christmas she went back to Poland and asked if her friend could come instead. I said that was ok only if I was actually in and she shouldn't give the friend my key.

Friend doesn't speak a work of english and after cleaning asked for £10 a hour I pay cleaner £9 and friend is much less efficient and I can't tell her what to do. Tried to tell friend after 4 hours it was enough but she didn't understand. I didn't have much choice put to pay her the £10.

Anyway cleaner texts me to say her father had died and she has gone back to Poland for a few days so can't come (fair enough) but can her friend come? I said ok but she needs to come before I leave for school run at 8.15am so I can let her in or after 8.45am. She didn't show so I did school run camback and then at 10am went out to do some shopping. When I came back at 11am and friend is there - cleaner gave her my key and alarm code!

Again she said she was there for 5 hours (normal cleaner would only do 4) and demanded £50.

So I am annoyed about cleaner giving her the key... also this morning when I went to get DS dressed I noticed that one of his shirts missing, also DH complaining one of his shirts missing too. Spend all day looking and can't find either. So now worried about friend stealing from me.

AIBU to be annoyed???

OP posts:
FabIsGoingToBeFabIn2010 · 23/01/2010 18:53

Seriously, are you asking?

Get shot of all of them and change the locks.

Tell them if the shirts aren't returned you will be calling the police.

bruceb · 23/01/2010 18:53

YANBU....personally I would change the locks, alarm code and say that this wasn't part of the deal.

Unfortunately I doubt you'll get the cost re-imbursed by your insurance company.

clam · 23/01/2010 18:53

Bloody Hell! No, YANBU!!!
Ask (or point!) for the key back and don't let her come again.

Portofino · 23/01/2010 18:54

I'd look for a new cleaner I think.

OpheliaPayne · 23/01/2010 18:54

I don't get why you didn't shunt her out the door after 4 hours and say 'no, I pay £9/hr, now be off with you!'

What are you going to do next?

I'd be annoyed about the handing over the key thing. And I would assume the original cleaner isn't coming back and has handed the job to her pal.

tiggergirl · 23/01/2010 18:56

you have right to be annoyed and i would just this is what i usually pay the cleaner this is what you get and just insist her friend does not come anymore it your right

thisisyesterday · 23/01/2010 18:56

no , you are not being unreasonable at all!

is the original clear via an agency? if so i would complain to them, and if possible charge them for the cost of replacing all your locks and the stolen shirt.

i would also inform the police

Original poster
MumNWLondon · 23/01/2010 18:59

Didn't shunt her out of door after 4 hours as didn't know how long she had been there.

Feel sympathy for normal cleaner as she has been through a lot over last 5 years - although she has been separated from her EX for a few years when she first started cleaning for me she used to not come or come with black eyes as he got drunk hit her and locked her up.

The original cleaner who have have had since 2003 has only gone to Poland for 3 days as her dad died (don't blame her for wanting some time off) just annoyed she gave key to a friend.

OP posts:
RichardGereandtheGuineaPigs · 23/01/2010 18:59

Fire her.

Original poster
MumNWLondon · 23/01/2010 19:00

no not an agency.... i trust the original cleaner, she babysits for me too, just don't trust the friend. also i know everyone cleaner cleans for - my MIL, my friends mum, my SIL.

OP posts:
CreditCrunchie · 23/01/2010 19:03

Seriously - P45 - that's just not on at all

flowerybeanbag · 23/01/2010 19:07

How can you trust the original cleaner? Didn't she give someone your key and alarm code after you very specifically said not to?

EcoMouse · 23/01/2010 19:10

YANBU. Get rid of both. The original, who went against your specific instructions and the second, because she's obviously intent on taking you for a ride.

Paolosgirl · 23/01/2010 19:13

You've checked all your valuables and papers are still where they should be, I presume?

Get your locks changed, and fire your cleaner. Seriously. I am the biggest wimp when it comes to this sort of thing, but even I would be livid.

YA definitely NBU

littlemissfixit · 23/01/2010 19:16

i would fire her. everyone goes through tough times, thats no excuse to be giving out alarm codes and keys after you have told her not to, i wouldn't stand for it. if you let the go on imagine how many other things in your home will magically disappear

onlyjoinedforoffers · 23/01/2010 19:18

£9/10 an hour? ill come amd do it for you!!!!

mummyofexcitedprincesses · 23/01/2010 19:41

Are these cleaners paying tax? It all sounds a bit dodgy to me- how do you know second cleaner is above board even if the first one is?

LucyEllensmadmummy · 23/01/2010 19:53

I would get rid

Are these cleaners paying tax?? why do you care?

Original poster
MumNWLondon · 23/01/2010 20:02

I know my cleaner pays tax, although I don't deduct it. I have helped her fill out tax declaration as she found it hard to fill out the forms. I am not that bothered, both from Poland - would only really worry about someone being here illegally and those from Poland have right to be here.

OP posts:
vixma · 23/01/2010 20:10

Bloody hell, I'm in the wrong job....I am a Teaching assistant and get £7.55 an hour...You should get rid if they are not doing as you ask as it is your home and you should decide when and who has your keys. I am sure many would jump at recieving 9-10 pounds an hour for cleaning...man, even I am considering.

Original poster
MumNWLondon · 23/01/2010 20:13

I have put my facebook status asking what is going rate for cleaner in NW London - responses so far around £8.

I didn't mind paying my normal cleaner £9 (before this happens) as she is super efficient and speeds around, but confirms the friend who is a CRP cleaner is taking the PSS.

OP posts:
almostreal · 23/01/2010 20:14

YANBU sack her ASAP.

hf128219 · 23/01/2010 20:16

Her friend also seems to have a selective understanding of English! 'But I want £10 per hour, so that's £50'. Nothing wrong with her maths either!

WashwithCare · 23/01/2010 20:21

Oh dear... but lets not cut our nose off to spite our face... a good cleaner is hard to find.

I think other posters are a bit harsh.

She's worked for you for 5 years. She has made a bad error of judgement in handing over the keys, but presumably she is not thinking that clearly at the moment. If my Dad died, and my employer sacked me after 5 years for making an error, I wouldn't be overly impressed.

Generally, I think the whole cleaning issue is a nightmare. Alhtough it is obviously your personal space, it is somebody else's workplace - and therefore things which may seem obvioulsy disrespecful and insensitive to you, may not have been intended to be so.

I seem to have a domestic army (gardener, nanny, cleaner, cat sitter) and have lost count of who has keys, or whether the nanny let in the temporary cleaner or not... Inevitably, I often fume about something that one or other has done. It's gnereally not worth sweating the petty stuff...

Are you sure the shirts are really missing - fabulous is you are so organised you can really tell (I wouldn't be able to!) Just remember, when are you feeling a tad violated, it is easy to jump to conclusions!

Have a glass of wine, and don't do anything too hasty!

WashwithCare · 23/01/2010 20:24

By MumNWLondon Sat 23-Jan-10 19:00:33
no not an agency.... i trust the original cleaner, she babysits for me too, just don't trust the friend. also i know everyone cleaner cleans for - my MIL, my friends mum, my SIL.

Oh - you didn't say... she babysits as well....

Good grief - send her flowers for her bereavment... tell her you'd rather her friend didn't come again though.