To hope,when peopletalk about the jobless/ benefits claimants etc and how awful they are, they don't mean me, and cares like me?

[Peachy]

So many threads lately where people talk about how lucky benefits claimants are compared to them, and how much better off they should be than the welfare dependant.

Well I worked right up until ds1's diagnosis, Dh worked right up until redundancy in a demanding FT job and is a FT student and has a PT job now (I am a PT student as well a registered carer, for ds3 who is also now diagnosed autistic).

I got my degree in 2008 hoping to train as either a teacher or SW afterwards, caring has taken both options as I can only be away from the house 9.30 - 12.30 becuase of childcare and SN transport. I look daily for jobs fitting that, but even when they do come up I don't even get an interview.

I consider myself far from underclass,and hate feeling that I am part of one just becuase I am ATM reliant on a welfare state.We can't try any harder,we are doing our very best with a batch of bad luck.

I am sort of sorry for posting this but it is easier to get out of my system than post it daily upset which is happening atm. I am also taking most threads out of my active threads area so I can't be upset again, but it seems sensible ATM.

Well, tbh, after this whole banking bullshit and MP expenses shite, I couldn't really care less about people doing a few hours of cleaning on the side.

And again, the royal family feels perfectly justified taking millions in taxpayer funds every year, living in state-owned housing and, until recently, not even paying any tax.

So, fuck it.

You lead by example, and the government's isn't a very good one.

People who've had hard times are much more understanding and emotionally intelligent about these things. The judgers are probably the same people who think the homeless are lazy buggers who should get a job.

What i think is funny is that people call those on benefits or in council flats 'lucky'. Then the same people can have a nervous breakdown because the neighboor plays music once a year on his birthday and disturbs their perfect life. Somehow i think they wouldn't be very happy in a large council estate.

Perhaps they are not angry at people on benefits but are angry at themselves for not coping with life and not enjoying life. And then they see a family on benefits who manage to budget and manage to have lots love and lots laugh and bright and polite children and it pisses them off. Judging reflects their own unhappiness.

Peachy and others who are on benefits because they need benefits is totally different to people who are committing fraud!

My mum was a single mum, we lived in a rough council estate, she had me and my younger brother no support form our dad (pre CSA days!) and had to have benefits, we had a great time as kids we had quality time, meanwhile she was studying at night to get qualifications (left school with little as she had me at 17 unplanned), started doing childminding to earn money did that whilst doing more college in the evenings....

Then started working full time in an office(we were both at school then me senior my brother junior) and has never looked back, we moved out of the estate we lived in when I was about 7 as it was being destroyed were rehoused, then we did an exchange moved form London to Swindon, then my mum saved and bought her own house and has never been on benefits since.

People like my mum and others who use the system to help them move on and get to a better place is totally different to those who choose a benefit lifestyle...and the only time I've been out of work for 1 month I never bothered claiming as I couldn't be bothered and didn't want to go through with the hassle of it all! Fingers crossed I never have to claim benefits, its not a plesant place to be, but if its needed then it has to be done!

But choosing a benefit lifestyle isn't always a choice anyway iykwim? I have a friend who was better off working 2 days a week than full time because she would loose the help with her benefits/tax credits etc... she wanted to work, had a friend helping with childcare so was fully able to but financially it didn't add up! She was better off not working when they made some changes to the tax credits system than doing her 2 days a week in the end! Despite wanting to work! her children are older now and she works full time...

Its all well and good being judgy about people but each persons situation/circumstances are very different, there are always going to be people who geniunelly have no intention of working sadly these are the people reported on the trashy tabolids/magazines and people make sweeping statements/generalisations about all people being on benefits being "skum"/lazy....well they are plain stoopid and ignorant imho.

I understand why you feel the need to justify yourself Peachy even though you shouldn't have to, as a couple of others have said walk in someone else's shoes before judging....I think you have to do what you have to do to get by and if it means using a system that is in place to help you get where you want/need to be then you need to do it. Life is too short for regrets, it must be very demanding and stressful for you all xx hugs

'Somehow i think they wouldn't be very happy in a large council estate.'

But they'd know many lyrics to pop and rap tunes, be able to sleep through a tornado (with the help of earplugs) and learn to be light on their feet (from dodging all that dog shit and broken glass) .

Laquitar, your posts are always so wise!

The dog shit would come from staffie and pit bull backsides too which they'd really hate

I 've been called 'wise' by one of the wiser people here!

at the dog shit! 'lucky' you, you get free exercise when others have to pay for gym!

I also get the chance to learn new Scottish swear words.

Now you are showing off too much and people will get envious and furious

PMSL

I was raised on a cuncilestate, apaprenlty one of the worst in the UK deprication-wise (probably partly as zsemi rural- no jobs and no services either). I never noticed tbh.

Although Mum does indeed have 3 staffies next door to her (and the occasionalpolice raid). However, my mate lives on a fabulous village new build area and her soon-to-be-XH has just ben arrested for sex trafficking (rude words abound but as I am not reaidng all threads I dont know what the consensus of latest be nice plea was) and DS1,here in our noice village has a definite ASD thing about the complete works of Aqua. Stylish, non?

from your op it sounds like both you and your DH are working.

my objection is to young able bodied people claiming jobseekers. there are jobs - they are shit jobs - but there are jobs. this is the reason i would introduce workfare.

Jobs does vary on where you are though- we happen (according to new yesterday) tolive in one of the three worst hit areas in the UK (typically LOL), and what used to be 7 pages of jobs in the localrag has shrunk to maybe half apage of mainly those dodgy work at homethings.Mum'spaper otoh has still got a fair range.

However,I do agree with workfare to an extent; aslong as it allows time for looking forjobs (DH attended over 200 interviews to get the last one, and that meant a lot of time just doing job search work) and as long as it allows for exisitng rioles- probably through being an ex volunteer manager I can imagine vast parts of the workforce of the third sector vanishing.

Dh has an internet shop, just start up but his degree gets him a licence a year for a different aspect of his field- in June he will be able to practice as an electrician, june after rigging and june after pyrotechnics (!) so he can expand it more each year.

Peachy we can't all be thinking that- or we'd all be chucking in our jobs to enjoy the luxuries of a council flat on benefits.