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AIBU?

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Original poster

to think it's ridiculous that children have Facebook accounts

147 replies

WhatNotHot · 12/01/2010 09:01

Whats the point of having an age limit?
I noticed on my DB profile that a child he has connections with, had been asked the question 'would you have sex with ....? The child is 8 ffs

And before anyone comes on spouting about how their 5 yo DD needs a FB account because of them having family that don't live in the same room, then don't bother, people managed to keep in touch before social networking sites were introduced Surely there are sits more appropriate for children, like this one

OP posts:
bruffin · 12/01/2010 11:55

Mine are 12 and 14 and have a FB account, they do keep in touch with their much older cousins who are atniversity and one is the side of the world, which they probably would have no contact with. I do have their passwords and both DH and i keep an eye on whats going on.
Once they get to secondary school I don't really see a problem, even maybe yr6 but earlier than that there is no point really.

ronshar · 12/01/2010 11:57

I think the main issue is the fact that Facebook have stated that it is suitable for 13+ only.
That is because there are strict rules governing the content, tone, availability etc of things on its site. These have been set by the regulating board in the USA.

I do think it is dangerous ground when we so obvioulsy flout the rules in front of our children.
That is the same as breaking a law because we dont agree with it!
The laws are there to protect us.

Also what ever happened to things that are for adults only? Why is it ok now for children to be exposed to all the things that adults do?

lemonadesparkle · 12/01/2010 11:58

I have a 11yr old DSD with a FB account and both dh (her father) and I hugely disapprove. None of our other children (2 of whom are older than DSD) have accounts.

She has in excess of 170 FB friends !!! There is no way an 11yr old knows that many people and many of them are over 18. Her profile pic is a full face shot of herself. From the pictures and chat on her page (and those of her friends) you can clearly work out where they go to school, how they get there etc etc. There is also the issue of her being exposed to conversations, pictures etc that its not necessary for an 11yr old to be part of (drunken pictures, foul language, racist and other suspect video postings etc) which will turn up in her news feed when the 'friends' post or comment on the activity of others.

Dh is deeply unhappy about the whole thing and as a result spoke to her and her mother about it. Mother was not concerned in the least rolls eyes not suprised emoticon and so dh told dsd that he would be reporting her for being under the age to have an account. She's not happy with him, but parenting isn't always about keeping your children happy at all costs. I don't know what safeguards are in place to prevent her from simply opening a new account but we are hoping that the fact her own father reported her and told her why he was doing it will be enough to make her reconsider.

LadyOfTheFlowers · 12/01/2010 12:00

SIL has just opened their kids FB accounts. They are 8 and 6.

I got a request and informed her I swear quite a lot on FB which she said was fine - didn't matter as they were more interested in FV and Fishville.

Ok I thought - but what about the 'Your friends have been taking the 'Which sexual position suits you best quiz' Take yours now!' notifications.

And stuff like 'Would you 'Bang' so and so?' kind of random stuff that appears on my wall from time to time.

Still, each to their own.

claw3 · 12/01/2010 12:07

Ive just had a letter from school this morning warning parents of cyber bullying on FB.
Apparently children have been starting hate groups about other children.

JamesTheCat · 12/01/2010 12:09

I started a thread about this on Sunday, as I am having a problem with my friend's DD having an account and her wanting to add me as a friend (and not understanding why I won't). It's causing friction in our friendship, although the situation should not even be arising IMO.

here

JamesTheCat · 12/01/2010 12:09

I started a thread about this on Sunday, as I am having a problem with my friend's DD having an account and her wanting to add me as a friend (and not understanding why I won't). It's causing friction in our friendship, although the situation should not even be arising IMO.

here

JamesTheCat · 12/01/2010 12:10

Oops sorry, double post

claw3 · 12/01/2010 12:12

Didnt realise the age limit was only 13, i thought it was 18 for some reason.

wannaBe · 12/01/2010 12:24

It is madness.

The rules are there to protect children and yet parents seemingly dont care about that.

The reality is that a large amount of children fall victim to predators on the internet, and the biggest reason for that is that they were allowed on the internet in the first place. Surely if a young child is groomed online the parents should be held partly responsible..

ronshar · 12/01/2010 12:50

Wannabe we now live in times where parents dont take responsibility for their own children.
It isnt my fault my child is fat they keep eating chips
Its not my fault my child was throwing bricks through the old ladies window, they wont stay at home
Why should they police their own childs internet use?

Hulababy · 12/01/2010 12:52

I thought they weren't allowed one til they were 13y.

No way 7y DD is having one, she knows what FB and has seen mine - and had a go, etc. with quizes and games - but that;s enough IMO.

gr8kids · 12/01/2010 12:53

Sad but true!!

jellybeans · 12/01/2010 12:55

YABU My older kids have it but are not allowed to do those quiz's and are very well watched. I have passwords etc and check regularly their accounts and am friends with both so can easily monitor everything they post/others post to them.

liamsdaddy · 12/01/2010 13:56

PoppyIsApain

I have all the PS2 versions of GTA and enjoy them - but I still wouldn't let a 12 year old play them.

My DW only actually lets me play then when DS is asleep, otherwise I'm too keep to the speed limits, be courteous on the road and stop at signals

LesbianMummy1 · 12/01/2010 14:12

www.myplaycity.com/magic_farm/?utm_source=GAdwGames024top18&utm_medium=googleadw004top18&gclid=CN3Nu u6Cn58CFUYA4wode3mEIA here you go free farm game without needing facebook

Nanga · 12/01/2010 14:14

OMG, I can't believe everyone's so po-faced about this! My son, 4 yrs, has a facebook page. It's just a bit of fun. He's only friends with immediate family, and with my sister and her kids living in New Zealand, it's a light-hearted, informal way of keeping in touch. It's usually me who does his status updates - just silly stuff he's done that day - more like an online diary. Not every day! Just if I'm on there anyway. It's not like I force him into it!

His grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins all love it and are always making comments and posting photos of themselves and sending him little messages. I didn't realise this was such a reckless leisure activity! And, yes, we do speak on the phone to the family, and even, gosh, see them occassionally too. It's just a fun way of keeping in touch. Lighten up people

gr8kids · 12/01/2010 14:41

thank you les

Original poster
WhatNotHot · 12/01/2010 14:42

But the point is Nanga, the rules on FB state you have to be over 13.

JamestheCat- My dds friends are on FB too, although they haven't added me. What a psoition to put you in! Just tell your friend you don't want children on your account.
DD age 9, is desperate for an account but she hasn't got a chance, seriouls its bad enough getting her to do any exercise as it is, I don't want to give her anything else to keep her sat on her bum.

OP posts:
Original poster
WhatNotHot · 12/01/2010 14:43

LM1-was going to try and find an alternative! That looks quite fun too [blush

OP posts:
issysmilkbottle · 12/01/2010 16:03

as the rules state you have to be 13 to have a Fb account I assume parents and children are lying about their date of births when registering. they are saying its ok to lie and yet I am sure if the kids tell a lie to them they'd tell them off? Double standards...

Children do not need Fb, there are alternatives that are suitable and no matter how tight you are with settings you'll still be exposed to inappropriate ads and postings....

Sunshinemummy · 12/01/2010 16:42

I find it very odd. DH's goddaughter has an account at the age of 7. Yesterday I saw a post from her replying to a post of her dad's with lots and lots of swearing in it. I was really quite . She seems to be on it a lot too.

onagar · 12/01/2010 16:49

I'm old enough to find some of this stuff odd too and perhaps there should be a FB for kids or something, but the whole "people managed to keep in touch before social networking sites were introduced" just doesn't work. People managed before telephones and before there was a postal service, but I imagine no one wants to go back to not having them.

On the plus side, despite the constant worrying about the dangers online they are at least at home doing it. Not hanging around on street corners talking to people who have not been vetted.

wannaBe · 12/01/2010 17:00

"His grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins all love it and are always making comments and posting photos of themselves and sending him little messages." at four I doubt he can even read yet so wtf is the point?

I don't get this need to give children access to everything adults have. facebook/mobile phones etc.. it really isn't necessary.

wannaBe · 12/01/2010 17:02

I do agree re facebook being the next means of communication (well social networks), but I don't see why children need to have access to it. I don't imagine many of us had our own phone line when we were children which essentially amounts to the same thing.

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