Not to send my 6 year old on a residential school trip?

[coldtits]

My 6 year old has a few behavioral and social problems. He's young for his age and I accept that may have been colouring my judgement.

Ds1's school are offering what sounds like a fun residential trip. It's morning until the NEXT afternoon, and apparently a lot of the children are looking forward to it.

Ds1 isn't going. Not a chance in Hell.

If he has an asthma attack in the middle of the nigh, neither he nor his 6-year-old-boy room-mates will know what to do. He would say he is fine with sharing a room but in reality my freak out at not having his own space.

And (and this is the AIBU part) he's 6. I don't think it['s necessary for the children to go residential when they are 6. What the hell is wrong with day trips? If it was a day trip, all the staff would be conscious nd I would let him go, totally. As it is, they don't have the same level of awareness as me and I don't trust them to sleep and be as aware as they may not even realise they need to be..

Have you discussed it with the teachers/TAs? If they can come up with a workable plan, taking your entirely legitimate concerns into account, then I would consider it IIWY - otherwise not.

My ds's infant school takes them away for a week in y2. (Mon am to Fri pm)

Ds1 went last year and loved it. Ds2 goes in Feb or March and is really looking forward to it.

HT sells it to nervous parents saying the only child to ever get hurt in I think 16 years of y2 residential was when they went to a play centre and child broke leg in ball pool.

I don't think anyone has ever 'not gone'.

Last year one boy was adamant that his mum had to come and pick him up on the Mon aft - but changed his mind when he got there and stayed all week.

Some of the children can share with adults if nec.

Will your ds feel any peer pressure to go? Is it possible for him to go for the day but for you to collect him before bedtime? Does he want to go?

My DD went on a full week residential holiday camp for the first time when she was 6.5. She barely spoke to me on the phone when I called as she was having so much fun. Two years later she wants to go on residential camps for practically the whole of the holidays and boarding school asap (I've said no, for now). Depends on the child, not the age.

If you think it's something that he would feel he had missed out on maybe you could ask the school if it would be appropriate for you to help on the trip.
I've done this and it worked out well.

Well, my out going, socialble, very senible. laid back 6 year old wouldn't be going.

Because he's 6. And too little.

Could you let him go but then bring him home for the overnight bit, taking him back the next day?

I can't get to him. I don't have a car so if he went he would HAVE to stay.

Shockers, I'm a single parent with another child - I can't go.

Colditz, my DS1 has never been on residential trips, because blike your DS he just couldn't cope.

It hasn't really bothered him, even though he felt he wanted to go.There were quite a few of the class that were left behind each time. We did go to the same museum on that the'd been to on the trip though, so he didn't feel totally left out.

the majority of schools don't take primary kids on residential trips until 6.

Did you see my other thread before Christmas about soul use accommodation for primary residential trips- something to consider...........

whoops -I meant 'until Year 6'.

I agree with Shockers, I think you should ask if you could go too, and get your other child looked after for the night. I went on a school trip to help my dd when she was in primary school and I really enjoyed it, and she could not have gone without me. My other dd went on a sleepover for the night. The primary school did a 4 night trip in yr 6; three night yr5; 2 night yr 4.

YANBU
I had my first sleepover at my best friend's house when I was six. I was developmentally normal and my friends mum knew me really well. There were no other children, apart from my friend's big sister, so no children from the class who might make things difficult.

I think is too young to invite a class of children to stay overnight anywhere. The issue is just too loaded. There will be children staying who shouldn't be, but their parents just want to take advantage of the free night.

Maybe you could let him stay up late and drink cocoa on the sofa with you and watch tv while his pals are busy screaming the teachers to sleep.

YANBU.

My DD (6) wanted a sleep over at her best friends house. They are family friends and have been in and out of each others houses since babies.

And at 11pm I had to drive to their house to pick her up. She missed her mummy!

I am very laid back but I would not let her go, unless it was within 10 minutes drive of our house! But she probably wouldn't want to go.

But my DS is 3 and he would love to go on a residential trip and it wouldn't occur to him that some people might miss their mummies at bedtime.

Every child is different!