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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think BIL was a twat

41 replies

biggirlsdontcry · 09/01/2010 17:10

BIL came over to visit yesterday , he can be a twat at the best of times , recent examples are = his ds is more special than our dc's because he was an IVF baby & our dc's were conceived naturally
he asked what school we are enrolling dd in for September & i told him that she will be going to a mixed school = boys & girls
to which he asked " will i be sending her in with condoms in her lunch box"
dd has just turned four last week , AIBU or is that just a weird & horrible thing for him to say , oh & he didn't laugh when he said it so it wasn't a joke .

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 09/01/2010 17:13

yanbu

the condom thing was horrid...has he usually such a dirty mind ?

I like a dirty joke as much as the next person, but go absolutely nuts when they are applied to children

yuk

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 09/01/2010 17:14

wanker.

TheRoyalty · 09/01/2010 17:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Intergalactic · 09/01/2010 17:20

He sounds really weird. Who on earth would come out with something like that? Is it perhaps a cultural thing that he doesn't think boys and girls shouldn't mix?

SixtyFootDoll · 09/01/2010 17:21

He sounds like a right nobber.
Ignore him.

Original poster
biggirlsdontcry · 09/01/2010 17:23

exactly - i felt repulsed tbh , anyfucker unfortunately yes he can be disgusting at times but he just doesnt seem to know when he has gone too far iykwim .
when our dd was born prematurely he visited us at the hospital & that's when he told us out straight that she was never going to be as special as his ds etc dh just told him she will be to us .

OP posts:
squeaver · 09/01/2010 17:23

How old is he? 13?

Original poster
biggirlsdontcry · 09/01/2010 17:27

mindset of 13 but actually will be 47 in march

OP posts:
SixtyFootDoll · 09/01/2010 17:27

biggirls, now i thnik he is an even bigger nobber.

kinnies · 09/01/2010 17:32

twat

Original poster
biggirlsdontcry · 09/01/2010 17:33

sixtyfootdoll

sick thing to even think let alone say -

OP posts:
SqueezyIsStartinAResolution · 09/01/2010 17:34

YANBU. Twat - him not you.

BitOfFun · 09/01/2010 17:34

Numpty. Don't waste headspace on him.

KimiLivesInStarbucks · 09/01/2010 17:34

Ask him why is he so proud he could not make a baby without medical intervention?
Little swimmers not up to the job? Or just keep a supply of jaffa oranges to offer him

Mishy1234 · 09/01/2010 17:35

YANBU.

What an arse! Why on earth would he even think to make the condom comment, let alone actually think it was OK to say it.

Original poster
biggirlsdontcry · 09/01/2010 17:35

intergalactic not a cultural at all , just a sicko imo

OP posts:
BelleDameSansMerci · 09/01/2010 17:35

What a total arse.

BitOfFun · 09/01/2010 17:36

That would be sinking to his level of being rude, offensive and inappropriate though, Kimi.

Original poster
biggirlsdontcry · 09/01/2010 17:41

i can understand fully that he worships his little ds , & the fact that he is an IVF baby makes him very special , but to come visit me & dh the day after dd was born four weeks premature & tell us that she was not as special as his ds because she was conceived naturally (2yrs of trying) was out of order tbh .

OP posts:
Casmama · 09/01/2010 17:44

ew what a horror - hope you told him you aren't amused by jokes involving sex and children and if he is its rather worrying!

Jamieandhismagictorch · 09/01/2010 17:45

Is a mixed-sex primary schools unusual where you are ?

Is he expecting you to pay privately/ go to a religious school - 'cos single-sex primary schools (I think) are unusual, aren't they ?

How very odd.

KimiLivesInStarbucks · 09/01/2010 17:46

But BOF sometime coming down to their level is the only way for them to get through

bearcrumble · 09/01/2010 17:52

No, I agree with BitOfFun you wouldn't want to stoop to his level of offensiveness.

I think it is truly shocking that he would say one child is more special than another (he can THINK it if he wants to, but not say it to you, and especially not when you're in hospital just having given birth prematurely - the mind boggles) and YANBU at all. He sounds like a wanker saying that stuff about condoms. You need to pick him up on it immediately next time he says anything like that and let him know it is unacceptable language. Honestly, some people are unbelievable.

Original poster
biggirlsdontcry · 09/01/2010 17:52

i actually said "what was that" as i had my back to him making tea thinking i had misheard him & he repeated it out loud to my face ,
then i just turned away & said that's disgusting .
no actually most of the schools around me are mixed schools , the school that my ds goes to is very hard to get into as it is highly rated & that's where dd will be going hopefully in September ,
dh reckons its a case of sour grapes on BIL behalf .

OP posts:
maristella · 09/01/2010 17:58

i really hope you contact this weird old man and make it very clear that such comments are completely inappropriate both about and infornt of children, and will not be tolerated. you could also remind him that your parenting choices, such as schools etc are not up for criticism.
does his wife know what he said?