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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to want my DP to go to work today

38 replies

lucyellensmumagain · 07/01/2010 07:13

you know, because of the SNOW!!!!! Yes, he is self employed, YES we need the money - but I need my DP in one piece not wrapped around a fecking motorway barrier or suchlike

OP posts:
MrsSawdust · 07/01/2010 07:22

Yanbu but try not to worry as the motorway will be clear.

mummag · 07/01/2010 07:23

i completely and utterly agree, i am sooooo worried about my dp cos it is treacherous out there, how do you know if a journey is essential? He is a teacher, so is it essential that he travels to get to work???

Original poster
lucyellensmumagain · 07/01/2010 08:02

We should have national snow holidays!! everything should stop - no one is allowed to get sick either so the doctors and nurses get to stay home and build snowmen!

OP posts:
ajandjjmum · 07/01/2010 08:11

For the last two mornings my dc have gone off to school, with ds driving, and my heart in my mouth! A level modules next week for both of them, so they really need to be there. Doesn't stop me worrying though, and phoning dd for a progress check every ten minutes!!

FimBOW · 07/01/2010 08:15

I don't want dh to go out either, our street always looks a 1000 times worse than it is as we live at the end of a tiny cul de sac with not much traffic movement. He has just gone off to the local Tesco Express on foot on the pretext that everyone will be stockpiling like they did in London! But I know him well enough to know it is a ruse to see what the main roads are like. Bets on for him coming back and saying he is going, despite the local radio/tv saying not to travel unless necessary.

robino · 07/01/2010 08:23

Same here. I know that really, once he gets out of our road he's straight onto motorway and there's only about a mile of non-motorway at the other end but it's a 70 mile journey and I just wish he didn't have to make it. I did manage to persuade him to stay off yesterday by throwing one of his own quotes back at him; we have a friend who was still trying to persuade his wife go mountain biking in north wales in the snow and OH had said to me "I don't understand why he wants to put his life at risk when he has two kids at home..."

Original poster
lucyellensmumagain · 07/01/2010 09:47

what annoys me, is when DP looks out of the window and says, oh, no more snow then (no more than we already have) And just assumes it will be the same 50 miles away! Because we notoriously miss out on the weather around here as we are in a dip - its idiotic, just about to ring him to check he got there in one peice

OP posts:
robino · 07/01/2010 09:48

am still waiting for my "I'm safe" text - he should have arrived by now. Probably just got caught up in work and forgotten about poor me panicking......

paranoidmother · 07/01/2010 09:51

My DH has decided to walk to the bus stop (3 miles away) to catch the bus to work. So i've sent with a shopping list of essientials as the dc's and I are going no-where till the weather improves.

I am also waiting for a 'I'm safe' message from him.

corriefan · 07/01/2010 09:59

I panic too, dh has to go through country roads to work. Have just phoned him and he got there ok but it took him ages to move the car off the hill this morning with the ice, plus he only passed his test a couple of years ago and still sin't very confident.
I had a little morbid session last night, couldn't stop imagining him skidding and getting him killed.
I did skid into a ditch once too, when I had ds as a baby and was pregnant with dd. It had only just started sleeting and I lost control because I pressed the brake too quickly. We were all fine and a few other cars did the same but it was scary.

corriefan · 07/01/2010 10:00

getting himself killed I meant! I'm not about to murder my husband!

Original poster
lucyellensmumagain · 07/01/2010 10:07

its properly snowing again now - have phoned DP who said the roads were ok but its snowing there too - i want him to come home, but he wont, of course

OP posts:
corriefan · 07/01/2010 10:10

Is he there though? Or still driving?

ChilloHippi · 07/01/2010 10:12

I tried to talk DH into staying at home today because I heard of crashes on the news and roads closed etc. He gets the bus to work, but buses crash too! He wouldn't listen and went anyway. Bloody men. Anything to get away from the house.

claw3 · 07/01/2010 10:13

Oh for crying out loud, these are grown men and a bit of snow we are talking about here, not children! Bah!

ChilloHippi · 07/01/2010 10:15

Ok, I admit, I wanted him here to play with DS in the snow. Surely making memories with DS is more important than work!

mummag · 07/01/2010 10:16

my dp got in safely, said the worst bit was actually getting on to the playground cos of the ice and skidding, apparantly all the cars were doing it. I am now ok, but will be very very worried till he gets home safely tonight. i hope there are no flash snow storm things and he has to sleep in his car, he is only a wee skinny thing (unlike me) he would not do well in that situation ( i think i am sounding like i am overly precious about him)

ImSoNotTelling · 07/01/2010 10:28

Claw that's a really unempathetic comment.

Roads round here have not been gritted, DH has to drive to work and is driving around in a van all day. Of course I worry about him.

claw3 · 07/01/2010 10:54

My own DP went to work today too and as a grown man i let him use his own judgment to gauge the weather conditions and whether he should travel or not. Not saying whether you should worry or not.

ImSoNotTelling · 07/01/2010 11:00

Yet on the other thread you say that mums are very sensible not to drive their children to school even if schools are open.

Do you think that men are better drivers than women?

Or that they are more expendable?

I find your approach inconsistent and a bit unpleasant TBH.

A load of people saying they are worried about their spouses who are having to drive in dangerous conditions. Your comment is not to the women not to worry, their OHs will be fine, but that the men themselves are being pathetic for being concerned. Nice.

claw3 · 07/01/2010 11:09

I didnt quite say that on the other thread. I said 'i wouldnt bother, as the school could close a few hours later, as my own ds's school did yesterday' or words to that affect.

My comment on this thread 'they are grown men, not children' was implying that they can take care of themselves and you shouldnt worry.

Not sure where all men are better drivers, more expendable etc has come from. Perhaps you are reading into it a bit too much.

ChilloHippi · 07/01/2010 11:17

Men aren't better drivers, but are more expendable

claw3 · 07/01/2010 11:25

Chillo, LOL dont try to lighten the mood whatever you do!

ImSoNotTelling · 07/01/2010 11:26

My DH has to leave for work in about an hour. He is just a normal man, an averagely good driver, in a normal small car. He doens't want to drive, I don't want him to, but he has to go to work. He will then be driving all day at work, but that doesn't worry me so much as it'll be on main roads and in a larger vehicle.

"Oh for crying out loud, these are grown men and a bit of snow we are talking about here, not children! Bah!"

I don't think he is pathetic for not wanting to drive, which is what your post suggests. It does not seem to me to be implying "don't worry". It is disparaging of men who are not keen on driving in this weather.

Unempathetic and tactless on a thread like this.

claw3 · 07/01/2010 11:44

Imsonottelling, I didnt imply men were pathetic for not wanting to drive, quite the opposite in fact. I was implying that men are not helpless and can make up their own minds.

Ok I give up, i wasnt trying to lighten the mood. You win, my approach is unpleasant, disparaging to both men and women, unempathetic and tactless.

I shall seek counseling and see my GP!