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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have text dh saying...

70 replies

ihatetinselbob · 20/12/2009 09:45

Dh and dc's in the kitchen with me this morning. Dh is usually at work when they have their breakfast. Dc's want to open their advent calendars.
DH says 'no, not until after your breakfast'.
I said 'they usually have them while I'm getting breakfast.'
DH says'not today, Daddy's here so it's Daddy's rules'.
I say 'you can't just change the way we do things just because you're here'.
Dh says 'my rules and my rules over-ride all other rules'.
I ignored this as I didn't want to kill him infront of the dc's.
He's flounced back off to bed for a lie in and I just sent him a text saying 'please don't do that again, you're rules are not more important than mine and I don't want dc's thinking that they are'.
I'm so with him.
AIBU?

OP posts:
littleboyblue · 20/12/2009 10:30

FWIW, I also would have gone to the bedroom and told the cheeky sod that if he thinks he can make the dc's live by his rules when he's at home, then he can be the main carer today and I'd have a day off, I'd then go shopping, and then to the pub and leave him to it until bedtime.
(Have done this once or twice)

lockets · 20/12/2009 10:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
ihatetinselbob · 20/12/2009 10:34

Littleboyblue- that's a good idea, that really would be revenage as ds1 is at a party this afternoon and he'll have to go and endure enjoy the party too!

OP posts:
littleboyblue · 20/12/2009 10:36

haha
Go on, do it. Let him get himself all wound up when ds1 wants cake before the sandwiches

ChippingIn · 20/12/2009 10:37

Is there even a slight chance he was joking??

If not - what a knob...

You showed much more restraint that I would have, kids there or not.... fucking cheek... I would have said something for sure and there's no chance he'd be snoring in bed right now.

MrsMorgan - they weren't arguing about it, he said not before breakfast, she just pointed out that it's not the way it's normally done (the other 4 million mornings he isn't there!!)... then he got all macho wankerish over it being his rules....

funkyanna37 · 20/12/2009 10:39

your hubby was well out of order... especially if you think he was actually serious and meant it...
But seems wierd to text - a conversation would be a better way to let him know you're not happy. Unless thats how you always communicate but just seems a bit odd...

Brunettelady · 20/12/2009 10:41

Do what Littleboyblue said, then he can use his own rules and you get a nice day out!!

Original poster
ihatetinselbob · 20/12/2009 10:43

lol at cake before sandwiches
Thanks ladies, I'm feeling much better now.

OP posts:
diddl · 20/12/2009 10:48

Why couldn´t they wait until after breakfast for once?

littleboyblue · 20/12/2009 10:50

Glad your feeling better. I have also text my dp when we've been in the same house to tell him I'm pissed off with him. Sometimes just doing that is easier than having a big barney, or more so in my case having dp roll his eyes at me so I want to beat him with my slipper! By texting, I can tell him exactly what I need to tell him without really losing my rag.

FabIsGettingReadyForXmas · 20/12/2009 10:52

YANBU

No way should he speak to you like that. who does he think he is, the fucking boss?

Orangesarenottheonlyfruit · 20/12/2009 10:52

I think I would have just laughed at him and told him not to be a numpty if he ever wanted a lie-in again!

mistletoemulledwinemoodlum · 20/12/2009 10:53

"Daddy's here so its Daddy's rules" - I don't think so... YANBU. I would be Mad.

FabIsGettingReadyForXmas · 20/12/2009 10:57

diddl - why they should they wait when they haven't had to up to now just because arse he wants to play the big man?

thelunar66 · 20/12/2009 10:58

I'm afraid I would have just roared with laughter at him.

Am highly amused at the thought of texting someone who is in the same house though - it would never cross my mind.

diddl · 20/12/2009 11:00

Well it might not have started out as him playing "the big man"

I agree that followed was awful.

But if the children asked their father & he said after breakfast, I can´t see the problem tbh.

Original poster
ihatetinselbob · 20/12/2009 11:01

diddl- they could have waited and as i said earlier, i would have agreed with him, if he hadn't have played the my rules card.

OP posts:
diddl · 20/12/2009 11:05

The thing is that as soon as you said they usually have them at breakfast you undermined him.

AnyFuckerForAMincePie · 20/12/2009 11:06

he is a tit

and I am loving princesstoadstool's no-nonsense approach at the moment!

FabIsGettingReadyForXmas · 20/12/2009 11:06

No she didn't. She was pointing out what normally happens as he is never there. HE was undermining HER by not going along with the normal routine.

littleboyblue · 20/12/2009 11:08

I don't think the OP undermind her dh. It reads like the dc's were going to open their advent calenders (not that they asked, that they were doing what they normally do) and the dh said no and OP just mentioned they normally do that and tbh I think that should have been fine and the whole thing dropped there, the dad just saying "oh ok" and that's that

Original poster
ihatetinselbob · 20/12/2009 11:08

I don't think I undermined him, I was simply stating a fact.
If he believes I undermined him, then i'll apoligise.

OP posts:
littleboyblue · 20/12/2009 11:10

DON'T APOLOGISE.
You didn't do anything wrong. If anyone needs to apologise it is him for how he spoke to you.

Original poster
ihatetinselbob · 20/12/2009 11:13

Thanks for all the replies, i appreciate them all.
I'm going to go start cooking dinner now and I may well have a chunk of chocolate while I'm going it.

OP posts:
ChippingIn · 20/12/2009 11:13

If you apologise I will slap you with a wet fish!!!

"Daddy's here so Daddy's rules" pft - who the hell does he think he is??