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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want to write christmas cards from ds to his pre-school 'friends'?

57 replies

Eddas · 07/12/2009 14:36

DS is 2.6, he goes to pre-school twice a week and this morning i've received lots of cards to him from the other children. That's great but he hasn't got a clue what they are or who they're from as he's 2!!

We got a letter home listing all the children's names and I think it's made people think they should send in cards

I have enough to do atm without writing cards on his behalf for people he doesn't even know really so AIBU to just pick a few kids he mentions and send them?

Is it me or is this a bit OTT, surely parents have better things to do?

Also, I overheard some of dd's classmates mum's talking this morning, saying they'd be writing cards for their dc(year 1 children) I'm making dd write them all she's 5.6 and once I tell her how to spell the names she'll be able to write them all herself won't she?

OP posts:
CMOTdibbler · 07/12/2009 15:45

Actually, last year DS (who was 2.5 at the time) really liked taking in his cards and giving them out. He's already asked me about doing cards.

I certainly have enough to do with my time, and would rather do cards for DS than send to my assorted relatives for whom my only contact is a card at christmas, since he gets some pleasure from it.

pennyrain · 07/12/2009 15:50

A boy in my dd's class donated money to charity and the parents sent in a sticker for each child stating the same....brilliant!! think stickers were homemade though so still a bit of work there!

cat64 · 07/12/2009 15:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Adair · 07/12/2009 15:54

pennyrain, that is UTTER wankage, no?

Dd gave them out to the 7 or so kids in her playgroup last year (she was 2.5) and enjoyed getting them too. But she LIKEd doing it and found it fun. I am sure we will do some for her friends coming to her xmas party too.

I like teaching her some of the rituals and traditions we do.

cece · 07/12/2009 15:57

No, mine do them if they want to and if they are willing and able to do it themselves!

InMyLittleHead · 07/12/2009 15:58

YABU, I am writing Christmas cards from my cat to everyone he knows, including other cats. It's basic good manners. Then I will dip his paw in pritt stick and glitter to make a print. You are a scrooge!

lol SCargot!

Original poster
Eddas · 07/12/2009 16:02

shit. I forgot cards from the cat

OP posts:
Georgimama · 07/12/2009 16:22

Oh God, cards signed as from pets are my personal Christmas hate.

notwavingjustironing · 07/12/2009 16:28

I would tell the cat that if he can't be arsed to write his own, then you are not doing it for him. Be firm. If you do it this year, next year he will expect you to do all his Christmas shopping, and wrap it all. You've got enough to do.

YANBY - HTH

CheerfulYank · 07/12/2009 16:28

YANBU. I personally like to send something (like candy canes with cards on them saying Love, DS) to daycare with my son, but if it's not your thing, definitely don't do it! Or go with the glitter festooned monstrosity that was previously mentioned.

AgentZigzagDoingAYuleLog · 07/12/2009 16:34

Oh my goodness inmylittlehead!! My cats friends! I'd totally forgotten them, thank you so much for reminding me lol

InMyLittleHead · 07/12/2009 17:00

Yes, I've already sent cards to Steve the farm cat, the builder's dog whose nose my cat scratched during the summer and the kittens whose food he regularly stole for a period of maybe 3 months before their owners complained.

reservejudgement · 07/12/2009 17:49

They have outlawed this at ds3's school now. Tis a relief!

mathanxiety · 07/12/2009 17:59

Don't even think about it. They all go straight to the bin.

And don't send glittery cards to cats unless you want your cat sparkling like a Christmas tree and the litter box turned into a glitter box.

2rebecca · 07/12/2009 18:50

Have never put any xmas cards the sprogs did get when little in the bin, that sounds really mean. The ones written by mummy always seemed a bit pointless though, especially when the whole class got one.

pollywobblebauble · 08/12/2009 00:31

hmm, i succumbed to social pressure when dd was smaller but now am breaking free;

dd has a pack of cards to send to whoever she cares to write them to

i have put in this year's cards from dh and i that i won't be sending any in future and will make a donation to charity instead....feels quite freeing really!

2rebecca · 08/12/2009 08:10

I suppose I don't send that many cards and only send them to people I usually write a short note to to let them know how we're getting on. Bloke sends his own cards to his relatives and friends, we got together late in life so do have distinct groups of friends. Neither of us writes over 20.
It's one of the few letters I do write to distant friends.
I don't bother at work, we all just wish each other merry Christmas, except a couple of women who seem to enjoy sending everyone a card, and addressing it from their whole family which seems odd when I've never met them.

littledawley · 08/12/2009 08:12

Eddas - I have no doubt that your daughter can write her cards it was just that this, "Also, I overheard some of dd's classmates mum's talking this morning, saying they'd be writing cards for their dc(year 1 children) " made me think you were being a bit judgey about children who can't.

Original poster
Eddas · 08/12/2009 11:30

I am not judgey I can assure you. The was as to why they bother writing them for their dc. If dd couldn't/wouldn't write them herself her classmates wouldn't be getting them written by me. That's the whole point of this thread!!

OP posts:
JemL · 08/12/2009 11:39

I wrote cards for all 45 kids in DS1's pre-school and it only took about the same amount of time as reading an AIBU thread (a MIL or Benefits based one, say) . Cards cost £1.

DS1 is 3.5 and very excited about posting his cards in the little box at school. He loves getting them too. Frankly, I'd rather do his than mine!

lovechoc · 08/12/2009 11:50

YANBU - why not just write ONE card to all the children in his class and it can get tacked to the noticeboard at pre-school??

DS is the same age as yours and not at pre-school til next year, so that's one less thing to worry about. what a load of nonsense. Fair enough when they are at school and have a better understanding, but pre-school??

littledawley · 08/12/2009 19:14

Although I totally agree with your take on the pre-school thing, my DS is in year one and really wants to be involved in the card giving and receiving but would struggle to write them all. That's why some parents write them for their children.

hazeyjane · 08/12/2009 19:19

I don't know dd1 (3.8) is giving cards to all the kids at preschool, and she is very excited about it, they have a little postbox, and we spent the afternoon making cards. Dd2 (2.6) isn't at preschool yet, but is pretty excited about cards and loves making them and opening them and so we made a few for the children we do singing and stuff with. I thought it was quite a normal thing to do

nickytwotimes · 08/12/2009 19:20

I got a letter asking that we NOT send cards for everyone and just one to the whole nursery.

I never KNEW there were people who sat and wrote out such a crazy number of cards!

Insanity.

Yanbu.

Original poster
Eddas · 09/12/2009 12:43

whenever you post something on mn there's always someone who takes offence and reads things the wrong way. I once started a thread moaning about the fact that my dd talks non-stop, there were people telling me to be greatful as their dc don't/can't/won't speak. That wasn't my point.

My point on this thread wasn't really about dd and her year 1 friends, that was more an add on. I know she isn't the same as everyone else, she can't ride a bike but I bet alot of the others can. As it has turned out she has got bored of writing her cards, I shall not be writing them for her, i've said she doesn't have to do it, but if she wants to she can. Maybe i'm just mean?! I really don't have time to do it and frankly I don't want to. I don't remember my mother ever writing cards for me.

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