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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to get the hump with the creche taking DD's teething beads off??

87 replies

RGPargy · 29/11/2009 22:27

DD is almost 2 years old.

I'm not sure whether or not i should be peed off! I took DD to the creche at the gym today. I dont normally take her on a Sunday but she goes there regularly once or twice a week and DP was working so i didn't have much choice. Anyway, when i signed her in, the lad and girl that were on reception are normally there during the week so i knew who they were etc. But when i picked her up, there was this woman in there who i haven't seen before who said to me "Oh we took her necklace off because it's quite close - just while she's playing......" I pointed out to the woman that it was an amber teething necklace and that DD wears it 24/7 so is used to wearing it. I then made sure i put it straight back on her while i was there, in front of the woman. She then went on to tell me how good she is with her speech and how well she knows her colours and shapes etc etc (like i didn't know that!!). But anyway, the more i thought about it, the more peed off i was at her taking her necklace off. AIBU to get the hump about it or am i just being sensitive about it??

It's the first time i've EVER had anyone say anything about it, to the extent where they have actually taken it off!! GGRRR!!

So, AIBU??

OP posts:
MistergodthisisSal · 29/11/2009 23:17

Yes, of course YABU.

She clearly didn't know it was safe, and was just trying to do the best for your child. She obviously doesn't / didn't know you, so she wasn't judging you, just assessing a situation and reducing any risks (or perceived then) to your child. I would have thought that's a good thing!

Sorry, but I think it's also a bit childish to "put it straight back on" in front of her - as if to "show" her. Poor woman must have been embarrassed. She sounds lovely.

lockets · 29/11/2009 23:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

AnyFucker · 29/11/2009 23:27

wtf is a teething necklace ??

Op, you sound like a loon

or a show-off

I haven't decided which yet

SecretSlattern · 29/11/2009 23:28

I'm more inclined to think "show off", AF

AnyFucker · 29/11/2009 23:30
Grin
JustAnotherManicMummy · 29/11/2009 23:32

OP

giraffesCannaeFlingPieces · 29/11/2009 23:36

YABU she was being cautious and also she was praising your dd and trying to make conversation/be nice to you - but you sound like a charmer

Hando · 29/11/2009 23:40

I a bit confused OP.

Firstly, it sounds like the creche worker was very sensible in removing a necklace from your childs neck. Perhaps they have a no jewellery rule?

Also, how on earth can amber beads be used as a teether? Can you chew amber beads then? Also, if the beads are tight to your dd's neck how does she get them into her mouth to chew on them?

bruffin · 29/11/2009 23:52

All the advice online says that babies should never be allowed to sleep in teething necklaces, so she should never be wearing it 24/7 in the first place.

MoreCrackThanHarlem · 29/11/2009 23:56

Hando Amber teething necklaces have healing properties apparently, and are often used by middle class faux bohemian types in conjunction with CDs of whale song to soothe babies in new age style

not suggesting for one second op is middle class faux bohemian type

MoreCrackThanHarlem · 29/11/2009 23:58

Not to be chewed, btw, the oil from the beads heats from childs skin and is absorbed into bloodstream

Ninks · 30/11/2009 00:00

Teething necklace

Someone got me one for DS once, bollocks did it work. The stones are quite chunky there was no way I thought he'd be comfortable in that all night and I was too chicken to even try, wouldn't have slept a wink.

But that's just me. I'm sure your DD is absolutely fine with it, and they look better on girls too I expect

YANBU to not want to be put into the category of uncaring mother who sends her child to creche wearing something dangerous. YABU to expect the creche worker to know about the safety features or to disregard what is probably policy and if not, common sense.

MrsGokWan · 30/11/2009 00:01

YABU for all the reasons veryone else has mentioned.

Also I think for the necklace to work as you intend it to the amber should not have a knot between each bead, they should be touching each other.

nothingofthesort · 30/11/2009 00:07

Err do you even have to ask? YABU and sound a leetle bit deranged.

fragola · 30/11/2009 00:28

A bit of info on how they're meant to work here:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amber_teething_beads

frazzled74 · 30/11/2009 00:40

whats wrong with a biccipeg ? If i had been creche worker, i would have removed them,.YABU

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 30/11/2009 00:54

I followed Ninks' link, and it seems "3. The necklace should not be chewed by baby."

WTF is the point of a teething necklace baby can't chew?

[confused Old Lady emoticon]

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 30/11/2009 00:57

(less confused after reading fragola's link )

Still wouldn't buy one though.

Jamieandhismagictorch · 30/11/2009 06:34

OP came back a while ago to acknowledge she had been a bit over-sensitive.

Calm down ladies ......

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 30/11/2009 06:43

Has all been said before but thought I'd add - not only are amber necklaces so much new age nonsense, and of course they could be a risk when playing or sleeping, why do you keep your DD in it 24/7? Either it has become a comforter for her in the way of a blankie in which case you will have a mare getting it off her, or you are way too gullible about the properties of amber, and relying on its 'calming' properties far too much. I think she might need some time without the necklace...

Jujubean77 · 30/11/2009 07:17

YABU

and you and your "teething necklace" sound awful

Skegness · 30/11/2009 07:18

Oh poor you, RGPargy! I think you must have gathered by now that the mumsnet consensus is that you were over sensitive on this occasion. I expect you're right that you felt criticised and were therefore defensive- happens to the best of us, imo/e. Sorry that you've been so roundly abused in the process of being told that you were unreasonable. I guess it's the nature of the AIBU beast but it can hardly make for easy reading.

I love amber so think the necklace sounds very nice. And personally I don't think it matters whether it "works" or not, in the scientific sense. It's like a dreamcatcher or cranial osteopathy or weaning your baby onto organic pears and millet. I actually like the fact that I'm more susceptible to that kind of thing when it comes to my babies. There's nothing wrong with a bit of poncy faux bohemian middle classness, when all is said and done.

Oblomov · 30/11/2009 07:46

Christ, some really nasty comments here.
And some of you don't even KNOW what a teething necklace is. WAKE UP.
I am not keen on them myself, but atleast I know what one is.
Or more to the point, even if I didn't, such nasty comments are unwarranted.
Yes Op was BU. She knows that. the nasty comments that followed are just bitchy.

GibbonInARibbon · 30/11/2009 08:08

The OP acknowledged she was BU.

But once again it seems to be the law to be as nasty, bitchy and scathing as one possibly can when posting on an AIBU thread.

comewhinewithme · 30/11/2009 08:17

I think everyone should calm down she said she was BU.

Maybe the teething necklace is more a comfort thing for her dd now she is older like some toddlers have a blanket or toy.

Some comments on here are just nasty and there is no need to be so vile.