12 year old wearing 3 inch stilettos?

[BigMomma3]

DD went shopping with her friend yesterday and bought some flourescent pink stilettos (cost 4 quid in Primark) and she is over the moon with them and insisted on wearing them to a birthday party tonight.

As soon as I saw them, I said she could take them back to the shop cos they are too old (and tacky) for her but DH said they were fine and to let her wear what she wants to wear as long as it's not indecent.

So she's gone to a 13th birthday party in skin tight black leggings, a black sparkly tight top with slits in the arms and bright pink stilettos and she looks a lot older than her years!! AIBU in worrying what her friends parents will think of us??

**being

bright pink stillettos

Make sure you take pictures so she can cringe over them in a few years time!!! I was an eighties child and i dread to think what i put on my feet.

lol at the emo comment, thats probably true.

I have to say though, my hamstrings are buggered from wearing high heels all the time when i was younger, im sure they shortened permanently.

I still dont understand how going to a childrens party in a pair of pink stilletoes is going to make her promiscuous? Surely that would be down to a lack of education and self respect due to bad parenting and not from bad choices in footwear??

Spikey shoes doth not a woman make.
YABU.

They only look like latvian hookers because we have forgotten what its like to be a teenager(thank god!!). However i still remember "borrowing" my sisters suede stilletoes for a youth club disco when i was 12,didnt do me any harm.

I have not forgotten (technically i am still a teen) and can i tell you how disturbing it is to see a young child walking around in a similar outfit you wore on a friday night out??!!

IT'S DISCUSTING!

It totally horifies me that these CHILDRENs' mothers could have ALLOWED their children to walk around like this!

It is NOT normal for a 12 year old to look 'sexy'. Why would you allow your DD to wear something that would attract attention to her (in more than a friendly way)? whether or not she acts on it... In only a couple of years she will get actual offers and don't be so niave to think your little darlings will not even consider it then.

SICK!

oooops that sounded REALLY bitchy....

Apologies for that ladies... it is just something i feel strongly about....

"I think it depends on your DD. Is she sensible? Is she aware of how men might see her and know how to deal with it? What are her friends like - will they look out for her if some dodgy bloke starts trying it on?"

Reading that made me feel quite sad. This is a 12 year old we're talking about. How men might see her and how she deals with it? Will her friends look out for her if some dodgy bloke is trying it on? Maybe I'm on another planet but a 12 year old shouldn't have to be worrying about these things, these are issues that adult women have to think about. YANBU OP, I'm glad that there are at least some parents out there who look out for their children by making them dress age-appropriately.

"YANBU OP, I'm glad that there are at least some parents out there who look out for their children by making them dress age-appropriately."

But the OP was overruled by her husband, so she wasn't looking out for her daughter very effectively.

Yeah, stand up for yerself woman!

Perhaps they could reach an agreement, BigMomma could dress in skin tight black leggings, a black sparkly tight top with slits in the arms and bright pink stilettos and amuse him if her daughter goes out without her hooker shoes.

Fastest way to put a girl off the entire outfit in fact.

Totally agree nothing

I think it is so sad that OP's DH has over ruled her when she is unhappy about it.

My DH could try.... but he would fail. We have a 'if one is happy and one isnt, then the one who isnt gets their way' rule (of course that is generalised and not true of all cases but is normally the way)

Ach, what's the harm in a pair of pink stilettos? Young girls love to express themselves through fashion. I'd advise her to take some flip-flops or trainers to come home in though - they'll be killing her by home time.

I don't think any grown women judge these children, only their parents perhaps.

My daughter is nearly 5 and I have complete control over what she wears. I'm not looking forward to her teens at all, if this is what's in store.
I would probubly tell her to take them back as they make her look like a hooker.
Weather she'd listen to me is another matter.

IMO, telling a young girl her outfit 'makes her look like a hooker' is more damaging than letting her wear high heels.

When I look back at pictures and videos of the clothes I spent my pocket money 6n at that age am mortified that I ever went out looking like that.
I did ask my mother why she never stopped me and she was of the same thinking of your dh OP. And I actually think she was right, the things she put her foot down about I sneaked and did anyway half the time. I went to a school with a strict uniform yet all us girls at 12/13 still rolled up our kilts and wore inappropriate shoes and make-up.

Leaving me to it didn't turn me into a hooker os make me sleep around and get pregnant at 14 it got it all out my system I looked like every other teenager even the ones whose parents forbade it as they did it anyway they just changed their shoes and added make up in the toilets at the school discos.

Ok bright pink stilettos are not ideal and not particularly appropriate for her age but she will do it and so will they all.

Why are all 12 year olds apparently wearing high heels? In dd's class (12/13) high heels are def not the norm.

I would have banned them.

lol at the snidey sarcasm, secondcoming.

I cant believe that so many people seem to think that pink stilettos are okay for children.

Deffo not the norm round here, not even for 14 year old dd1 and her friends.

MamaLazarou I couldn't agree more.